Is it rude to bring food if you are asked 'just to bring yourselves'?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I can’t believe you are complaining about 5 beers, half a log of goat cheese, and some fresh fruit in your fridge. The goat cheese would have been gone immediately because I’m a goat cheese lover and I would have tossed the pasta salad right away. This is not something to think about for more than 30 seconds.

Well...YOU'VE devoted more than 30 seconds of your life to thinking and typing about it, so there's that.

[Anonymous]

I was raised that it was rude to show up empty handed. Growing up in my small town every said to not bring anything and everyone showed up with food. It would be rude to not come with anything.

DCUM taught me that some people here take me unplanning very seriously. Now I bring wine. It seems safe no matter what. Different areas and different cultures do things differently.

[Anonymous]

That should read take menu planning seriously

[Anonymous]

can you package a bunch of it up into say, 10 lunch bags and hand them out to homeless people? That would kill two birds with one stone...feeding someone hungry and clearing out your fridge.

[Anonymous]

If you don't like the food, toss it. Otherwise, just be happy for the excess and the fact that you can enjoy leftover party food for a few days - aka, no cooking!

[Anonymous]

As a host, I find it annoying. If it is more of a potluck style, yes. We also have food allergies and dietary preferences so I don’t want to worry about what my kids can and can’t eat in their own home. I will always be gracious about it but really on the inside I wish you hadn’t.
I think if you feel you need to bring something you should bring a hostess gift instead.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I can’t believe you are complaining about 5 beers, half a log of goat cheese, and some fresh fruit in your fridge. The goat cheese would have been gone immediately because I’m a goat cheese lover and I would have tossed the pasta salad right away. This is not something to think about for more than 30 seconds.

You and I think similarly. No wonder so many people are over-stressed and overwhelmed in life. This is the type of thing that should require 0 mental energy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I can’t believe you are complaining about 5 beers, half a log of goat cheese, and some fresh fruit in your fridge. The goat cheese would have been gone immediately because I’m a goat cheese lover and I would have tossed the pasta salad right away. This is not something to think about for more than 30 seconds.

You and I think similarly. No wonder so many people are over-stressed and overwhelmed in life. This is the type of thing that should require 0 mental energy.

Then don't give it the mental energy you just did. See how that works?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:can you package a bunch of it up into say, 10 lunch bags and hand them out to homeless people? That would kill two birds with one stone...feeding someone hungry and clearing out your fridge.

5 lunch bags, each with some grapes, some blueberries, some pasta salad, some goat cheese and crackers, and a beer. Um.

[Anonymous]

I don’t think your guests did anything wrong, but they did go a bit overboard.

Personally, I always take non-perishable food or something that doesn’t need refrigeration. I put it in a disposable container. That way the host can choose to put it out or save it for later. I often take muffins or something the host family can enjoy the next morning.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I was raised that it was rude to show up empty handed. Growing up in my small town every said to not bring anything and everyone showed up with food. It would be rude to not come with anything.

DCUM taught me that some people here take me unplanning very seriously. Now I bring wine. It seems safe no matter what. Different areas and different cultures do things differently.

Also safe - flowers, olive oil, balsamic vinegar, muffins for breakfast, bread and jar of nice jam, a cooler with popsicles that you take home the extras.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I was raised that it was rude to show up empty handed. Growing up in my small town every said to not bring anything and everyone showed up with food. It would be rude to not come with anything.

DCUM taught me that some people here take me unplanning very seriously. Now I bring wine. It seems safe no matter what. Different areas and different cultures do things differently.

Agree that reading these responses has me thoroughly confused on what, if anything, to bring when invited to someone’s house. No don’t agree that wine is a safe choice because we have many friends who don’t drink or who are particular about the wine they drink (and I’m no oenophile!).


I think I should just decline every invite!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I can’t believe you are complaining about 5 beers, half a log of goat cheese, and some fresh fruit in your fridge. The goat cheese would have been gone immediately because I’m a goat cheese lover and I would have tossed the pasta salad right away. This is not something to think about for more than 30 seconds.

You and I think similarly. No wonder so many people are over-stressed and overwhelmed in life. This is the type of thing that should require 0 mental energy.

Then don't give it the mental energy you just did. See how that works?

Stop. You don't get to tell people what they can post or say or think.

There is a difference between having an opinion on how people react to a situation and getting upset at the situation the OP describes.

[Anonymous]

Bring it to work or throw it out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was raised that it was rude to show up empty handed. Growing up in my small town every said to not bring anything and everyone showed up with food. It would be rude to not come with anything.

DCUM taught me that some people here take me unplanning very seriously. Now I bring wine. It seems safe no matter what. Different areas and different cultures do things differently.

Agree that reading these responses has me thoroughly confused on what, if anything, to bring when invited to someone’s house. No don’t agree that wine is a safe choice because we have many friends who don’t drink or who are particular about the wine they drink (and I’m no oenophile!).


I think I should just decline every invite!

Flowers.