Smirk Given My Son at Carpool Line

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My son this morning struggled with his backpack in carpool line. The girl that was the patrol who was supposed to help gave him the biggest mean girl smirk to a friend as he entered the building. I wanted to roll down my window and say STOP...

This is just a rant but I just don't understand why kids feel the need to be mean.

Gave him the smirk or to the girlfriend? If she smiled at a friend, perhaps you misinterpreted. If your son didn't see it, doesn't really matter. If she smirked at him, ask him about it.

Regardless, he has to handle it himself.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:LOL. Your son won't be any better when he gets to her age. Let it go OP.

What? No - you’re supposed to raise your children, not ‘let everything go’ and release self absorbed useless assholes on the world.

this just shows how clueless you are...

[Anonymous]

Unless there's some pertinent info missing here, it doesn't sound like anything to get worked up about. I coach hundreds of 4th and 5th grade girls in a sport and this is what they do. There are mean girls in the group, but there are twice as many hormonal, insecure, little girls that want to fit in. They are the masters of smirking with their friends and trying to look cool and the vast majority of them are really not out to hurt the feelings of younger children.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Unless there's some pertinent info missing here, it doesn't sound like anything to get worked up about. I coach hundreds of 4th and 5th grade girls in a sport and this is what they do. There are mean girls in the group, but there are twice as many hormonal, insecure, little girls that want to fit in. They are the masters of smirking with their friends and trying to look cool and the vast majority of them are really not out to hurt the feelings of younger children.

Oh my goodness yes. My 9 year old and her little friends (all good, kind, kids with parents who keep them on a short leash) have just discovered eye rolling and sarcasm and it is a CONSTANT battle to get them to understand that other people will think they are rude if they take that tone.

[Anonymous]

Ok, so I spoke to the girl and she tells me that she wasn't smirking at your son. She was actually smirking at you and your 1992 haircut. So, you don't have to worry about your DS anymore. He's fine.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP something similar happened to me in middle school. The cheerleaders were outside greeting carpool one morning and when they saw me getting out of the car they stopped waving their signs and turned away (small school- I was the only person getting dropped off). I was so busy staring at the ground and walking around the back of the car to avoid them I didn’t notice, but my mom did and then called the school. They got read the riot act (to the point of tears) by the principal and had to personally apologize to me. I was pretty embarrassed that my mom did that at the time, but now I’m glad they were told off. They were awful to me for years.

Point being, it’s not in your head. And it’s mean and kids can be mean.

Great story! If you are from here, I'm sure some of those girls grew up to be those playground moms!

[Anonymous]

OP,

I am the mother of a child with some special needs. If either he or I had gotten upset over every little eyeroll or giggle in his direction, we would be severely depressed. You have to understand that not every incident needs to be magnified and fought over. Some people are jerks, we know this, and we move on, self-esteem unaffected. Don't teach your child to be oversensitive, otherwise he'll be miserable later on. Save your outrage for much bigger deals, they will happen.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP something similar happened to me in middle school. The cheerleaders were outside greeting carpool one morning and when they saw me getting out of the car they stopped waving their signs and turned away (small school- I was the only person getting dropped off). I was so busy staring at the ground and walking around the back of the car to avoid them I didn’t notice, but my mom did and then called the school. They got read the riot act (to the point of tears) by the principal and had to personally apologize to me. I was pretty embarrassed that my mom did that at the time, but now I’m glad they were told off. They were awful to me for years.

Point being, it’s not in your head. And it’s mean and kids can be mean.

NO here. I find it a bizarre over reaction, in OP's case. Who is to say that you and OP are not internalizing this and creating an issue that wasn't there?

[Anonymous]

*NP

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP,

I am the mother of a child with some special needs. If either he or I had gotten upset over every little eyeroll or giggle in his direction, we would be severely depressed. You have to understand that not every incident needs to be magnified and fought over. Some people are jerks, we know this, and we move on, self-esteem unaffected. Don't teach your child to be oversensitive, otherwise he'll be miserable later on. Save your outrage for much bigger deals, they will happen.

+1

THIS, THIS, THIS. How the mean girls act or don't act should *not* even be on your radar, OP. You are a grown adult, act like it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My son this morning struggled with his backpack in carpool line. The girl that was the patrol who was supposed to help gave him the biggest mean girl smirk to a friend as he entered the building. I wanted to roll down my window and say STOP...

This is just a rant but I just don't understand why kids feel the need to be mean.

OP, you're a grown adult, right? And the patrol was a fifth-grader -- a person who is 10 or 11. And for all you know, the smile was not a "mean girl smirk" about your son's backpack, but instead a totally different smile about something totally unrelated to your son. Dial it down.

+1 OP you're either not describing the interaction very well or bizarrely overreacting.

Agree.

+2 if she smirked while he was in front of her, I’d say they were related. The connection here isn’t that strong.

[Anonymous]

May I suggest a hobby, like yoga and deep breaths to calm yourself over insignificant stuff.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP something similar happened to me in middle school. The cheerleaders were outside greeting carpool one morning and when they saw me getting out of the car they stopped waving their signs and turned away (small school- I was the only person getting dropped off). I was so busy staring at the ground and walking around the back of the car to avoid them I didn’t notice, but my mom did and then called the school. They got read the riot act (to the point of tears) by the principal and had to personally apologize to me. I was pretty embarrassed that my mom did that at the time, but now I’m glad they were told off. [/u]They were awful to me for years.
[u]
Point being, it’s not in your head. And it’s mean and kids can be mean.

Sorry this happened to you but the situation described by the OP is not the same thing at all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP,

I am the mother of a child with some special needs. If either he or I had gotten upset over every little eyeroll or giggle in his direction, we would be severely depressed. You have to understand that not every incident needs to be magnified and fought over. Some people are jerks, we know this, and we move on, self-esteem unaffected. Don't teach your child to be oversensitive, otherwise he'll be miserable later on. Save your outrage for much bigger deals, they will happen.

Excellent perspective! Thank you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:May I suggest a hobby, like yoga and deep breaths to calm yourself over insignificant stuff.

I'll take it even further and suggest a Xanax prescription. OP, you seem to be an overly anxious individual.