Mf gf hit me for the first time (DV in lesbian relationship)

[Anonymous]

Press charges. If it were a man the DCUM harpies would be calling no for his head. Women are the perpetrators of domestic violence more than men and lesbian couples are hugely affected by domestic violence.
Think of it like this, had you said all the same stuff yet explained your BF hit you, you’d get a ton of responses to call the police or that there’s no excuse for his behaviors. Same applies here...call the cops and separate from a dangerous relationship and realize she’ll hit you again

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You lost me when you described your gf as “the more masculine one” instead of simply bigger and stronger. That’s a very straight way of thinking and I now assume you’re a troll.

Perhaps a troll trying to determine if people react differently to violence between lesbian couples versus heterosexual couples?

Apparently they do react differently. If OP were a DW in a heterosexual marriage and her DH physically attacked her and beat her up for throwing his phone, there's no way so many of the replies would be of the "you started it" or "you deserved it" variety. Instead there would be an overwhelming cry to call the police, call a domestic violence hotline, and divorce immediately because once an abuser always an abuser. So, yes, there is a double standard at work here.

Double standards are a part of life. If it was a man who beat up OP, she would be in a hospital or worse.

And that makes this instance you know...like better and stuff...

She could have ended up in the hospital regardless. It’s not like women aren’t capable of sending one another to the hospital or that every guy does.

You’re a misogynist

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I agree that you started it and I’d probably slap you too. Frankly, you should’ve just taken the slap and let it go but apparently you fought back physically too.

No domestic violence is ever the answer, but I do feel differently because it’s two women. I’ve been in a fist fight with a woman who outweighed me by a good 60 pounds. It meant nothing, it was a fair fight and I won. (Not a domestic, just a regular old cat fight.)

It is not fair to make unfounded accusations, then think you can flip out and destroy very expensive property with no repercussions. You wanted to control her. Your means of that was to interrogate her, and when you didn’t like the answer, make it impossible for her to use her phone. That’s worse than a smack to me.

I know I should've walked away after the slap but I was already heated and then when she hit me, it just made it worse. I regret the whole thing. I know I started it which was immature of me but I can't believe she took it as far as she did. I damaged her phone and I would've paid for it once I calmed down and realized what I'd done. She didn't have to beat me up over a material object. I guess that's what is really making me question her and our relationship. ~ OP

It wasn’t over a material object - it was over your behavior - jealous, controlling, entitled, violent. You need to get a handle on this before you enter another relationship (because this one is over - you can’t come back from a physical fight).

He hit you because of your behavior. You’re jealous, controlling, entitled and violent. You had it coming to you...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You lost me when you described your gf as “the more masculine one” instead of simply bigger and stronger. That’s a very straight way of thinking and I now assume you’re a troll.

Perhaps a troll trying to determine if people react differently to violence between lesbian couples versus heterosexual couples?

Apparently they do react differently. If OP were a DW in a heterosexual marriage and her DH physically attacked her and beat her up for throwing his phone, there's no way so many of the replies would be of the "you started it" or "you deserved it" variety. Instead there would be an overwhelming cry to call the police, call a domestic violence hotline, and divorce immediately because once an abuser always an abuser. So, yes, there is a double standard at work here.

Double standards are a part of life. If it was a man who beat up OP, she would be in a hospital or worse.

And that makes this instance you know...like better and stuff...

She could have ended up in the hospital regardless. It’s not like women aren’t capable of sending one another to the hospital or that every guy does.

You’re a misogynist

OP should've thought of that before destroying the property of someone who could retaliate and beat her up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You lost me when you described your gf as “the more masculine one” instead of simply bigger and stronger. That’s a very straight way of thinking and I now assume you’re a troll.

Perhaps a troll trying to determine if people react differently to violence between lesbian couples versus heterosexual couples?

Apparently they do react differently. If OP were a DW in a heterosexual marriage and her DH physically attacked her and beat her up for throwing his phone, there's no way so many of the replies would be of the "you started it" or "you deserved it" variety. Instead there would be an overwhelming cry to call the police, call a domestic violence hotline, and divorce immediately because once an abuser always an abuser. So, yes, there is a double standard at work here.

Double standards are a part of life. If it was a man who beat up OP, she would be in a hospital or worse.

And that makes this instance you know...like better and stuff...

She could have ended up in the hospital regardless. It’s not like women aren’t capable of sending one another to the hospital or that every guy does.

You’re a misogynist

OP should've thought of that before destroying the property of someone who could retaliate and beat her up.

OP should have thought about destroying his property before he turned around and beat her up....

Chances are if that was said you’d be livid.

[Anonymous]

Oh please, both of them need professional help.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Oh please, both of them need professional help.

I think the whole thing was made up by 23:51.

[Anonymous]

I smell a troll. There is a writing style here that's almost always associated with someone making the story up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I agree that you started it and I’d probably slap you too. Frankly, you should’ve just taken the slap and let it go but apparently you fought back physically too.

No domestic violence is ever the answer, but I do feel differently because it’s two women. I’ve been in a fist fight with a woman who outweighed me by a good 60 pounds. It meant nothing, it was a fair fight and I won. (Not a domestic, just a regular old cat fight.)

It is not fair to make unfounded accusations, then think you can flip out and destroy very expensive property with no repercussions. You wanted to control her. Your means of that was to interrogate her, and when you didn’t like the answer, make it impossible for her to use her phone. That’s worse than a smack to me.

I know I should've walked away after the slap but I was already heated and then when she hit me, it just made it worse. I regret the whole thing. I know I started it which was immature of me but I can't believe she took it as far as she did. I damaged her phone and I would've paid for it once I calmed down and realized what I'd done. She didn't have to beat me up over a material object. I guess that's what is really making me question her and our relationship. ~ OP

It wasn’t over a material object - it was over your behavior - jealous, controlling, entitled, violent. You need to get a handle on this before you enter another relationship (because this one is over - you can’t come back from a physical fight).

He hit you because of your behavior. You’re jealous, controlling, entitled and violent. You had it coming to you...

PP here and that’s not what I said. The relationship is over because physical abuse is a deal breaker. But OP is emotionally abusive, and she needs to get to the root of that before she gets in a new relationship. I did not say that she “had it coming”.

[Anonymous]

It doesn't sound like you're ready to be in a relationship, OP.

Please do everyone a favor and live by yourself for while, to work on your issues.

[Anonymous]

Bumping because it seems I came across OP on /r/parenting too: https://www.reddit.com/user/valleygirlj/submitted/

If it's a troll, they're dedicated.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You lost me when you described your gf as “the more masculine one” instead of simply bigger and stronger. That’s a very straight way of thinking and I now assume you’re a troll.

Perhaps a troll trying to determine if people react differently to violence between lesbian couples versus heterosexual couples?

A few years ago, I thought Jeff had mentioned there was a PhD psychology student on here making up posts as part of a soctal experiment to see what people's reactions were to different life scenarios.
Maybe that person is back.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Bumping because it seems I came across OP on /r/parenting too: https://www.reddit.com/user/valleygirlj/submitted/

If it's a troll, they're dedicated.

Those posters on Reddit gave great advice to OP - it rivals DCUM - but she just.wasn’t.getting.it. What a train wreck, and a helpless child will potentially be in the thick of it. I can’t spend another moment on her threads because it’s making me want to jump out of my skin.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Both of you have anger problems. Get help.

YES!