+ 1 yup |
| So there's the idea that it's nice to call people what they prefer to be called... regardless of whether you think their title is undeserved, or doesn't deserve respect, or they're crazy to insist on it... |
When I was in grad school, the only faculty members who demanded that you call them Dr Larloman were those who were fresh out of grad school -- aka the youngest, greenest, least impressive faculty. Older, more secure, tenured faculty would have laughed if you had called them Dr. Larlawoman, in my experience. |
But their colleagues, including us teachers, just call them by their first names, most of the time. Ex: Me, to administrator: "Larla, where would you like to meet our grade-level team today?" Me, to other teache in the school: "Larla says there is an all-staff meeting on Thursday." Me, to school parent: "I will ask Dr. Administrator about that and get back to you." |
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OP, as a lawyer you are a "Doctor of Law" ... i.e. J.D.
In many countries lawyers are called doctors. Tell her you are fine calling her doctor as long as she calls you that too. Seems like she might have wanted to be a lawyer. Many PhDs are worthless...she sounds like she has security issues. |
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Maybe you caught her in a day when she had been dealing with other instances of disrespect. I read an article recently (maybe here on dcum) where female physicians were more likely to be called by their first names where their male counterparts were referred to as "Dr.". After reading it I couldn't remember an instance where that had happened to me and but I just had to wait two short days later. Three people, two women and 1 man, all PhDs, waiting to be called to speak on a panel. The person sent to get us walks in and he says, "Dr. Man, Sue, and Jane we are ready for you."
Never one to get ruffled by something like this, there was moment of "hold up!, we are all PhDs". All that to say, maybe you were the last straw. |
I do too. In her linked in profile and her signature, she has Dr. listed everywhere. Meanwhile I have colleagues with PhDs from first tier universities and they're the least hung up on whether people use their title (because people recognize they're brilliant without having them flaunt their title). |
There's also the idea of not condescendingly correcting your colleague like a pompous ass. |
OP here. Maybe. And maybe I'm just projecting, but it seems something that older women do to younger women (I'm 30). Male coworkers never try this stuff with me. I wouldn't have known she was a PhD until she told me, as I've only ever communicated by email with her. 90% of my coworkers are Phds, have Master's degrees or are lawyers. And it's not a fake PhD like the Doctorate of Education that you all are talking about. |
| Haha oh man. Apparently she thinks she's rare and impressive (or, has a serious inferiority complex) but the truth is well over half of the people in this area are technically "doctors" - lawyers are doctors, heck...chiropractors are doctors! |
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My Ph.D wife always says: unless you're ready to say "yes" when someone yells "IS ANYONE ON THIS PLANE A DOCTOR?" then just don't.
Got her Doctor Who tshirt that said "Not that kind of Doctor..." |
Ditto, from another PhD |
Ha. As an undergrad at a Southern, traditional school, all professors were referred to as "Dr." In my PhD program, we called all professors by their first names--everyone, that is, except for my mentor, who was very senior and extremely accomplished and older (over 60). We all called him Dr. for some reason. I actually can recall the first time I referred to him as "Dave" in an email.
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It is not condescending or pompous to let your colleagues know what you prefer to be called. It's like asking about and correctly using someone's designated pronoun in order to show respect for their identity, which I'm told the kids all do these days. |
"Why, does someone have a question about medieval French politics that needs immediate answering?" |