Invisible Labor

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I get the point, I just think it's a bit belabored and whiny.

- A Woman who does more, but is okay with that because her partner also does a lot.

Many women have partners who don't do much.

I mean, I'm not saying it's entirely their fault, but I purposefully searched out a mate who demonstrated initiative and household sufficiency. He's the only college guy I know who would routinely cook me dinner and iron my shirts for interviews.

You're right, I was more interested in a good looking, funny, socially adept guy. My fault.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am female and only sort of agree with the cartoon. There are some things, like making dental appointments for the kids, that DH always does on his own initiative. He does the wash on his own initiative, and at least 50 percent of the cooking. Some things, like making sure the kids have clothes that fit them, are on me.

My DH does nothing for the house or the kids on his own initiative, and our oldest child is 17.

Well I assume you've been married and okay with this for 18 years then. I would have laid down the law on year 1 if that was my husband. Especially if we both worked.

I've never been okay with it but yes, I have not left him over it, nor has he changed one iota.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I get the point, I just think it's a bit belabored and whiny.

- A Woman who does more, but is okay with that because her partner also does a lot.

Many women have partners who don't do much.

I mean, I'm not saying it's entirely their fault, but I purposefully searched out a mate who demonstrated initiative and household sufficiency. He's the only college guy I know who would routinely cook me dinner and iron my shirts for interviews.

I did too. I looked for a full partner. DH also looked for a wife who could cook and clean too (in addition to working outside the house) because so many of his ex girlfriends couldn't manage a household and he didn't want the household to be all on him.

My mom always told me to "get them young and train them hard"- referring to a husband. lol. DH came pre-trained. I will teach my sons to manage a household, just as I will train a daughter. That's the key that I think is missing in society. We have low expectations for sons.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I get the point, I just think it's a bit belabored and whiny.

- A Woman who does more, but is okay with that because her partner also does a lot.

Many women have partners who don't do much.

I mean, I'm not saying it's entirely their fault, but I purposefully searched out a mate who demonstrated initiative and household sufficiency. He's the only college guy I know who would routinely cook me dinner and iron my shirts for interviews.

You're right, I was more interested in a good looking, funny, socially adept guy. My fault.

And why can't a man do all that and still manage to work a toilet bowl brush or a washing machine? We're not talking rocket science here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I get the point, I just think it's a bit belabored and whiny.

- A Woman who does more, but is okay with that because her partner also does a lot.

Many women have partners who don't do much.

I mean, I'm not saying it's entirely their fault, but I purposefully searched out a mate who demonstrated initiative and household sufficiency. He's the only college guy I know who would routinely cook me dinner and iron my shirts for interviews.

You're right, I was more interested in a good looking, funny, socially adept guy. My fault.

Um. They're not mutually exclusive traits. Sorry you got a dud.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I get the point, I just think it's a bit belabored and whiny.

- A Woman who does more, but is okay with that because her partner also does a lot.

Many women have partners who don't do much.

I mean, I'm not saying it's entirely their fault, but I purposefully searched out a mate who demonstrated initiative and household sufficiency. He's the only college guy I know who would routinely cook me dinner and iron my shirts for interviews.

You're right, I was more interested in a good looking, funny, socially adept guy. My fault.

And why can't a man do all that and still manage to work a toilet bowl brush or a washing machine? We're not talking rocket science here.

Of course a man can, but it's like finding Miss America with a Ph.D in Physics, pretty rare IME.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I get the point, I just think it's a bit belabored and whiny.

- A Woman who does more, but is okay with that because her partner also does a lot.

Many women have partners who don't do much.

I mean, I'm not saying it's entirely their fault, but I purposefully searched out a mate who demonstrated initiative and household sufficiency. He's the only college guy I know who would routinely cook me dinner and iron my shirts for interviews.

You're right, I was more interested in a good looking, funny, socially adept guy. My fault.

Um. They're not mutually exclusive traits. Sorry you got a dud.

So your husband is good looking and social and funny and has a good, interesting career, and also pulls his weight around the house? Keep your unicorn and congrats!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I get the point, I just think it's a bit belabored and whiny.

- A Woman who does more, but is okay with that because her partner also does a lot.

Many women have partners who don't do much.

I mean, I'm not saying it's entirely their fault, but I purposefully searched out a mate who demonstrated initiative and household sufficiency. He's the only college guy I know who would routinely cook me dinner and iron my shirts for interviews.

You're right, I was more interested in a good looking, funny, socially adept guy. My fault.

And why can't a man do all that and still manage to work a toilet bowl brush or a washing machine? We're not talking rocket science here.

Of course a man can, but it's like finding Miss America with a Ph.D in Physics, pretty rare IME.

So you're saying that his wife should do it because it rare to find a man who can work a toilet bowl brush? Please expect more from men.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I get the point, I just think it's a bit belabored and whiny.

- A Woman who does more, but is okay with that because her partner also does a lot.

Many women have partners who don't do much.

I mean, I'm not saying it's entirely their fault, but I purposefully searched out a mate who demonstrated initiative and household sufficiency. He's the only college guy I know who would routinely cook me dinner and iron my shirts for interviews.

You're right, I was more interested in a good looking, funny, socially adept guy. My fault.

Um. They're not mutually exclusive traits. Sorry you got a dud.

So your husband is good looking and social and funny and has a good, interesting career, and also pulls his weight around the house? Keep your unicorn and congrats!

Yes. I did have to get my hooks into him at age 19, and then I followed him around the country for his career for 10 years, but the hard work has paid off! I married up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I get the point, I just think it's a bit belabored and whiny.

- A Woman who does more, but is okay with that because her partner also does a lot.

Many women have partners who don't do much.

I mean, I'm not saying it's entirely their fault, but I purposefully searched out a mate who demonstrated initiative and household sufficiency. He's the only college guy I know who would routinely cook me dinner and iron my shirts for interviews.

You're right, I was more interested in a good looking, funny, socially adept guy. My fault.

Um. They're not mutually exclusive traits. Sorry you got a dud.

So your husband is good looking and social and funny and has a good, interesting career, and also pulls his weight around the house? Keep your unicorn and congrats!

Yes. I did have to get my hooks into him at age 19, and then I followed him around the country for his career for 10 years, but the hard work has paid off! I married up.

No thanks I'll keep my good looking, funny, socially adept guy who won't pull his weight at home. You haven't slept with another man since you were 19????

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I get the point, I just think it's a bit belabored and whiny.

- A Woman who does more, but is okay with that because her partner also does a lot.

Many women have partners who don't do much.

I mean, I'm not saying it's entirely their fault, but I purposefully searched out a mate who demonstrated initiative and household sufficiency. He's the only college guy I know who would routinely cook me dinner and iron my shirts for interviews.

You're right, I was more interested in a good looking, funny, socially adept guy. My fault.

Um. They're not mutually exclusive traits. Sorry you got a dud.

So your husband is good looking and social and funny and has a good, interesting career, and also pulls his weight around the house? Keep your unicorn and congrats!

Yes. I did have to get my hooks into him at age 19, and then I followed him around the country for his career for 10 years, but the hard work has paid off! I married up.

No thanks I'll keep my good looking, funny, socially adept guy who won't pull his weight at home. You haven't slept with another man since you were 19????

NP If you're happy with your division of labor, why are you even posting on this thread? Glad that your husband can't work a toilet bowl brush and I'm glad that you are okay with it. I expect more from men.