If your teen suddenly announces s/he is transgender...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just Google detransition stories and you will understand why this transgender trend in teens is so serious.

Kids start taking hormones when they are CHILDREN. This causes IRREVERSIBLE SIDE EFFECTS.

This whole idea that if you don't support a kid who says they are trans by letting them take hormones, etc or they will kill themselves is bullshit.

Most kids who think they are transgender these days are really not. Transgenderism is rare. Most of these kids are often just gay, or confused, or have a host of other issues.

+1 billion.

[Anonymous]

People don't develop body dysmorphia from outmoded gender roles from the 1800's

[Anonymous]

Not so easy. It's not about parenting. The amount if crap that my friend went with her now "non-cis" child is unbelievable. Testosterone shots didn't solve anything, still obsession with sex, alcohol, etc., still anxiety. My friend just gave up (two years of rehab, inpatient treatment, tons of therapy, gender dysphoria is just the most recent diagnosis): still same yo-yo child soon to be an adult. Mental illness in family history (schizophrenia and depression).

[Anonymous]

I think there are legitimate transgender people (Caitlin Jenner is a perfect example of that) and there is the YouTube generation of "transgender" kids who are most definitely jumping on a bandwagon. If you have a child who watches YouTube, you become acutely aware of how many kids out there find it fashionable. I feel for parents who have to figure out if something is a phase or not. Either way, I assume all parents are trying their best to make the right decision for their child and I feel nothing but compassion for having to make that call.

[Anonymous]

Read this and thought this crowd would find it interesting:

From this article summarizing a reddit AMA on trans issues.
http://www.teenvogue.com/story/reddit-transgender-ama-busts-myths#intcid=dt-recirc-cral1

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QUESTION: Now that the LGBT community has become more main stream and accepted, are you seeing more children and teens come in who may not actually be trans but rather are trying to fit in or find some way to find an identity?

Dr. Johanna Olson-Kennedy, Children’s Hospital L.A.: What is true is that unpacking the gender binary is becoming increasingly popular, because I think youth recognize that it is not adequate for deeper human existence. Gender roles are largely archaic in many regards. SO are youth experimenting with gender bending? Yes, absolutely. But they are not in distress. They are bending in solidarity with a movement to dismantle an obsolete set of gender rules, and stand in solidarity with their trans friends and the community. There are distinct differences in these youth. They are not likely to stick a needle in their body every week to be trendy. There is no reward for being trans. I can't get adolescents to finish ten days of antibiotics. It is so critical to differentiate between distress and social change.
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I find Dr. Olson-Kennedy's insight: "I can't get adolescents to finish ten days of antibiotics" particularly compelling.

[Anonymous]

Is anyone on here trans? Jesus Christ what a skewed conversation this is.

[Anonymous]

What percentage of people are trans? If you judged by media coverage, You would think that at least 80%are trans! Recently someone went around asking people about what percentage of Americans are gay and a boatload of people said 25% or something like that LOL

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think there are legitimate transgender people (Caitlin Jenner is a perfect example of that) and there is the YouTube generation of "transgender" kids who are most definitely jumping on a bandwagon. If you have a child who watches YouTube, you become acutely aware of how many kids out there find it fashionable. I feel for parents who have to figure out if something is a phase or not. Either way, I assume all parents are trying their best to make the right decision for their child and I feel nothing but compassion for having to make that call.

+1 If a kid comes out of nowhere (no prior experience with gender nonconforming behaviour) and declares themselves trans, I'd assume it is a phase. The fastest way through a phase like that would be to indulge it just enough to make it not fun.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote: I went through a phase of wishing I was a boy, dressing like a boy and cutting my hair short. Thank God it was before the "trans" fad. I grew out of it and I'm a married mother of two.
This complete thing is so overblown and extremely confusing and potentially harmful to children and adolescents.

+1 and the way parents make such a fuss over it like it's so wonderful

[Anonymous]

I would rather err on the side of being a supportive parent than a parent that rejects their child. Growing up and finding your own identity is a hard process.

My best friend is trans and I think he is a lot happier and at ease living as a man than as a woman. His parents are incredibly supportive of him.

I believe that the percentage of population of people who are gay is around 4 to 5% (it's difficult to get an accurate census since people will lie about it) and people who are transand even smaller population but trans issues are in the news more. Likely because being gay is less and less of an acceptable target for conservatives but they can still pick on trans people to make the Christian conservatives happy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote: I went through a phase of wishing I was a boy, dressing like a boy and cutting my hair short. Thank God it was before the "trans" fad. I grew out of it and I'm a married mother of two.
This complete thing is so overblown and extremely confusing and potentially harmful to children and adolescents.

I agree. It's ridiculous.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:or you could reach out to PFLAG, the gender clinic at Children's https://childrensnational.org/news-and-events/childrens-newsroom/2015/childrens-national-opens-youth-pride-clinic-for-district-lgbt-youth or any number of other resources.

Jut because your child's announcement seems "sudden" to you doesn't mean that it hasn't been well thought out by the child over a long period of time.

Trans kids are at huge risk of suicide and other self-harming behaviors. Family support is a tremendous protective factor.

Whether your child eventually decides to transition or not is less important than whether your child is happy, healthy, and alive.

+ infinity

If the child is under 18 it’s not their choice whether they transition. Get them psychiatric help.
Also, consult the American Academy of Pediatricians on guidelines regarding transgenderism in children. PPs post about a child having a “well thought out” transgender decision is extremely misguided. Your child needs mental help. Not an enabler.

[Anonymous]

I nod and say "sure, honey" and go on with my day.

Most of these declarations are teens trying to fit in and seek an identity. They don't actually mean anything. So it's best to wait and see.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote: I went through a phase of wishing I was a boy, dressing like a boy and cutting my hair short. Thank God it was before the "trans" fad. I grew out of it and I'm a married mother of two.
This complete thing is so overblown and extremely confusing and potentially harmful to children and adolescents.

I agree. It's ridiculous.

+1

Especially when were talking about injecting hormones into the body, binding breasts, and potentially cutting off genitals and essentially sterilizing a person.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would rather err on the side of being a supportive parent than a parent that rejects their child. Growing up and finding your own identity is a hard process.

My best friend is trans and I think he is a lot happier and at ease living as a man than as a woman. His parents are incredibly supportive of him.

I believe that the percentage of population of people who are gay is around 4 to 5% (it's difficult to get an accurate census since people will lie about it) and people who are transand even smaller population but trans issues are in the news more. Likely because being gay is less and less of an acceptable target for conservatives but they can still pick on trans people to make the Christian conservatives happy.

I think it's appropriate to be supportive for any non-permanent changes. Hair, clothes, names are temporary and can be changed back later if a person changes their mind. Surgery and hormones have permanent repercussions. The health risks are significant and understudied. There are bone density, problems, cancer risks and more, never mind the sterilization aspect. I worry for kids who are just a bit lost and exploring their identity who get caught up in this and make permanent changes. Especially those kids who never expressed gender identity confusion before their teenage years.