Would you have said something?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If Grandparent's Day was ridiculous and a waste of time, the top prep school would not be holding the event every year. Grandparents haven't paid a cent for their grandchildren's education, btw. They are not the only independent school who does this. Laugh all you want--they wouldn't hire a kid-hater like OP's SIL.

Oh I don't think you want to go down the road of what types "top" prep schools hire.

You have to admit that 7th graders are too old for Grandparents Day. Come on PP. I would suggest you talk to the school about having the almost teens head to a local retirement home and do community service there instead of bringing in Grandparents to visit.

[Anonymous]

Not liking kids is a "thing" with some women. They think it makes them less like other women, and thus better. For those women, it's not enough to not like kids; they have to proclaim it regularly, so that you understand you're not supposed to group them with other women.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If Grandparent's Day was ridiculous and a waste of time, the top prep school would not be holding the event every year. Grandparents haven't paid a cent for their grandchildren's education, btw. They are not the only independent school who does this. Laugh all you want--they wouldn't hire a kid-hater like OP's SIL.

Oh I don't think you want to go down the road of what types "top" prep schools hire.

You have to admit that 7th graders are too old for Grandparents Day. Come on PP. I would suggest you talk to the school about having the almost teens head to a local retirement home and do community service there instead of bringing in Grandparents to visit.

The students do plenty of community service. The day is for the grandparents.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If Grandparent's Day was ridiculous and a waste of time, the top prep school would not be holding the event every year. Grandparents haven't paid a cent for their grandchildren's education, btw. They are not the only independent school who does this. Laugh all you want--they wouldn't hire a kid-hater like OP's SIL.

Oh I don't think you want to go down the road of what types "top" prep schools hire.

You have to admit that 7th graders are too old for Grandparents Day. Come on PP. I would suggest you talk to the school about having the almost teens head to a local retirement home and do community service there instead of bringing in Grandparents to visit.

The students do plenty of community service. The day is for the grandparents.

Which is why many schools have done away with this tradition. Many kids, especially by middle school have lost a grandparent or two.

[Anonymous]

Some of the fathers are getting up there, too. We had two students lose their fathers before graduation.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Not liking kids is a "thing" with some women. They think it makes them less like other women, and thus better. For those women, it's not enough to not like kids; they have to proclaim it regularly, so that you understand you're not supposed to group them with other women.

OP's SIL might also be rebelling against her parents' expectations that she would get married and have children. This would explain her resentment spilling over to OP, who has fulfilled their expectations.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She's a jerk, but I wouldn't have said anything. Anyone with half a brain listening to that conversation will come to their own conclusion about her character.

+1. You handled it just right. And that would be the last family dinner with that particular relative, if she has so little grace and kindness that she tells her young relatives that she can't stand them...to their faces. Ugh.

the last dinner with that relative? That is a complete overreaction.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP clearly is judging her SIL and thinks less of her for loving animals and not kids, as she's mentioned the fact in both her posts.

This.

OP also comes across as very entitled ( how dare BIL and SIL only give her snowflakes one gift to share) and shortsighted ( somewhat understandable as she's in the middle of under 6 world), but I'm guessing SIL would tell a different tale.

Your kids are probably not just a little loud, but most likely completely out of control, and expect to be the center of attention, even when grownups are talking., and need to be constantly "engaged"
by someone.
You were looking for trouble. Your SIL is probably tired of your constant passive aggressive comments that she doesn't enjoy anything little kid. Your party comment was completely passive aggressive.

Your little snowflakes didn't give a damn about her comment.
You didn't need to say anything and in the future you'd do well to continue to keep your mouth shut.

[Anonymous]

I'm not sure I would have thought of anything to say in the moment, but I'd stop inviting her to your kids birthday parties and I'd try to save my kids from having to be around her, since she clearly resents their presence.

[Anonymous]

No. I would have let it go. It is her opinion and she can share it if she wants to. You do not have to agree with it and it does not prevent you from living your life. Grow a thicker skin, OP. And learn to not take things so personally. You are hyper-sensitive.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP clearly is judging her SIL and thinks less of her for loving animals and not kids, as she's mentioned the fact in both her posts.

This.

OP also comes across as very entitled ( how dare BIL and SIL only give her snowflakes one gift to share) and shortsighted ( somewhat understandable as she's in the middle of under 6 world), but I'm guessing SIL would tell a different tale.

Your kids are probably not just a little loud, but most likely completely out of control, and expect to be the center of attention, even when grownups are talking., and need to be constantly "engaged"
by someone.
You were looking for trouble. Your SIL is probably tired of your constant passive aggressive comments that she doesn't enjoy anything little kid. Your party comment was completely passive aggressive.

Your little snowflakes didn't give a damn about her comment.
You didn't need to say anything and in the future you'd do well to continue to keep your mouth shut.

Mean much? What got under your skirt? You are making a lot of assumptions about the OP and her kids. You are either a bitchy SIL or you are bitter in your life and looking to take it out on others who post. Which is it??

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"Well, I'M not a fan of intolerant, rude adults who don't take the feelings of others, particularly their family members, into consideration."

"By the way, while you may not be able to stand little kids, they are the future and if you care about things like social security and Medicare you'll recognize that least WE'RE doing OUR part by producing tax payers to replace the two of us."

Wow. I'm not a fan of the rude SIL, but I don't get the moral superiority of having two kids. She's a teacher; she's probably doing her part also.

Agreed. My husband and I don't have kids; we are so happy being aunt and uncle to many. I think your SIL is horribly rude and mean-spirited. But if you start playing the "I'm a superior citizen because I reproduced card" I'm going to get salty. I pay school tax in two different communities despite not having one kid in either, have volunteered with summer camps, and regularly donate to kid-causes. I think I'm a pretty good citizen even though I don't have kids.

[Anonymous]

Next time just smirk ..and let her wonder...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She's very awkward socially, but really, there's nothing to say to her tactless honesty. You did the right thing to let it go. So she doesn't like little kids. So what? Lots of people don't. And she doesn't have to like your kids either, especially while they're little. For all you know, she may be great with them when they're older. Just let it be. Don't go all self-righteous breeder.

+1.

[Anonymous]

First of all, I bet OP's kids are not out of control or loud, and very well behaved. It is the SIL that is rude, obnoxious and evil. Regardless of how she feels about kids, these kids are her family. She needs to treat them with dignity and respect. Making that sort of comment at dinner in front of family is out of line.

OP you took the appropriate action by ignoring her. You can change her behavior. I don't understand why some people teach. I am sure your children are amazing and lovely.