Filled with anger!

[Anonymous]

"Uncle X, you are welcome to come visit your sister in my home while you are visiting. I ask that you also bring all legal paperwork regarding my mother's land interests. In preparation for sale, we have retained a lawyer and he will need all of the paperwork to get things started. Looking forward to seeing you!"

[Anonymous]

Good for you, OP!

[Anonymous]

Glad to see you stand up for your mom's rights, OP. I hope things turn out well. Rooting for you.

[Anonymous]

Op, learn to say no. No one can force you to do anything.

Take your mom to see him. Drop her off and come back for her later. Refuse all other contact with him. Heck, you can even tell him why!

[Anonymous]

Update: I asked a cousin who is my friend to intervene on my behalf and tell my uncle that my mother and I want the land sold. Uncle said no, if he sells her land cheap, he'll have to sell his own land for cheap, and he doesn't want to do that.

He has had this land for thirty years, and has had who knows how many opportunities to sell it.

My blood is boiling. I don't know if I've ever been this angry in my life. I am never going to see that man or his family again. No way, no how. They are out of my life.

Still angry.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Update: I asked a cousin who is my friend to intervene on my behalf and tell my uncle that my mother and I want the land sold. Uncle said no, if he sells her land cheap, he'll have to sell his own land for cheap, and he doesn't want to do that.

He has had this land for thirty years, and has had who knows how many opportunities to sell it.

My blood is boiling. I don't know if I've ever been this angry in my life. I am never going to see that man or his family again. No way, no how. They are out of my life.

Still angry.

Your uncle is a fucking asshole.
You should have him buy out your mothers portion of the property at fair market value.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is a very complicated situation so I will leave out a lot of details:

My mother grew up in a country that is now dangerous, and has limited rights for women (and is dangerous for women!). When her parents died, her brother took control of her inheritance, a piece of land that he has been farming for the last 30 years. He has never shared profit on this farming with my mother.

This year, he is immigrating to the US to be with his daughter, and he promised to my mother to sell the land. My mother has mental illness issues and no job, and no money. She lives with me and my aunt (her sister) provides her a lot of financial and emotional support). The land she "owns" is worth about $60,000, and she has repeatedly told her brother she really wants her money. After he got her hopes up, he is now telling her that the buyer for the land is not offering enough money. It's pretty clear he has no intention of selling the land, ever. My mother expressed some pathetic disappointment, as she always has when he screws her over.

I know this is my mother's problem, and it has nothing to do with me, but I am So. Freaking. Done.

Throughout her life, my uncle has taken advantage of my mother, taken money from her when he needed it, etc., but he has never protected or helped her even though he is a physician and she has always clearly had mental illness problems. He pushed her into an arranged marriage with a man who turned out to be awful after my grandfather died, mostly because he wanted to get on with his life and she was living in my grandfather's house (which he subsequently took possession of). She has never stood up for herself and loves him so much even though he is a shit of a human being. Now, when he comes to the US, I'm expected to schlep my mother to my aunt's house, visit with him and his awful wife and his awful daughter and play nice, and even have them come and visit me in DC (!!!) so that he can sightsee.

Every ounce of my being is screaming NO! I honestly want to completely cut these people out of my life. I do not want to visit them, I do not want to have them visit me. I want my children to grow up not knowing that they exist. I am literally sitting at work, unable to work, seething with silent rage. I know that this is irrational but I still feel it. Help me! Help me calm down, at least, talk some sense into me!

Hell no. You don't need those awful people in your life.