Craving an experience with a woman, but I don't want to hurt my husband!

[Anonymous]

I can't imagine being married to someone where just asking if sleeping with someone else would be ok would end the marriage. If DW asked me and I said no, I trust her enough not to do it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I can't imagine being married to someone where just asking if sleeping with someone else would be ok would end the marriage. If DW asked me and I said no, I trust her enough not to do it.

Really. So your DW comes home from work and says, "hey honey, there's a new guy over in purchasing that has asked me to have anal sex with him. He's really hot and I'd like to do that, and maybe give him a BJ too. Would that be OK With you?"...that you'd just say "no" and everything would move on as if nothing happened? Really? No cause for concern at all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't think I'd upset if my DW brought this up.

Just don't be surprised if he OKs this, but down the road wants to fool around, too.

Im a woman and agree with the last part . I don't get why it's ok for op to experiment with a woman but not a man ( one could say oh, I've never been with a black guy or Latino or whatever and try to apply the same concept). Without his consent it's cheating, period. With his consent it's another story, but as pp said it opens the door to her husband potentially requesting a hall pass as well, so she must be prepared for that.

[Anonymous]

DH here. I would LOVE it if DW wanted to hook up with another woman. Total fantasy.

[Anonymous]

OP, I've done this, but cleared it with my husband first. I'd had fantasies about women for a long time, and there was a friend to whom I was attracted (she was also married). My husband knew she and I were close, and he'd tease me about being attracted to her. When we were discussing a trip I was planning to take with her and some other friends, I asked him how he'd feel if something happened between her and I - and he told me he'd be fine with it. So, I did, on that trip and then again a few months later. After the second time my husband asked me some questions about it, and decided he actually wasn't as ok with it as he thought he would be. So, that was the end of my sexual relationship with her (though we remain friends).

My husband and I aren't prudish, but we're definitely not an anything-goes kind of couple either. I think the idea of me having sex with another woman just didn't feel threatening to my husband, because he and I both knew what it was - experimentation for fun - and that I wasn't going anywhere.

So, I guess my perspective would be: talk to your husband about it, tell him what you want and why, and see how he reacts. I think that's a much better approach than sneaking around, especially given what you described.

For what it's worth, my experimentation with my friend was a lot of fun, but it definitely confirmed for me that I am primarily attracted to men. The newness of it all was exciting and interesting, but I never felt the same intense arousal with her that I've felt with men. It was different. In that since especially I'm glad that I had the chance to try it... now I can think of women as attractive and potentially interesting sexual partners, but not realy wonder what I'm missing or crave trying it out the way I did before.

Not the OP but thank you for sharing this. I have always been curious about sleeping with a woman, so I found your experience very insightful.

[Anonymous]

Would you grant him a hall pass to mess around with a woman? Then ask for one for yourself too.