Etiquette regarding when you know a coworker is applying for other jobs

[Anonymous]

I don't get you op

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I feel like there maybe just 1-2 people posting repeatedly that horrible, sucky person. Perhaps trying to bait me.

I made a mistake. I had nothing to gain from telling but I wasn't trying to undermine the co-worker. It was just that I had a piece of rather surprising information. And I tried to make amends by telling the coworker what I had done.

Honestly, if I was applying for another job and used another manager as a reference or was applying for another job inside my agency, I would expect to word to get around quickly. That is unless I asked that manager ahead of time not to say anything. Maybe that is part of the culture in my agency.

Nah, pretty sure we're all in agreement that you effed up.

+1

NP

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Well on the plus side, you're unlikely to ever asked to be a reference again since you'll have the reputation as a tattle tale

Yep. OP, that was kind of a jerk move.

[Anonymous]

I can't imagine why anyone with any common sense would ever go what you did. I'm dumbfounded. On the plus side, now you know what you did was completely inappropriate.

[Anonymous]

This person trusted you to list you as a reference. I think it'd mean to tell his supervisor. In fact, I would not discuss it with anyone. Once the person accepts the job, it's their responsibility to notify their supervisor.

[Anonymous]

Let's get to the bottom of this. OP, are you still around? OP said that she mentioned it to her boss, and her boss told her she should tell.

OP, do you tell your boss everything? What is the relationship there? Is it expected that you carry all the office gossip to him/her, or get the lay of the land? Do you always do everything your boss tells you to do (aside from directives, of course)? Is this a mentor type relationship?

I think this part is the most telling on why OP did this. Do you make many decisions on your own OP?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I feel like there maybe just 1-2 people posting repeatedly that horrible, sucky person. Perhaps trying to bait me.

I made a mistake. I had nothing to gain from telling but I wasn't trying to undermine the co-worker. It was just that I had a piece of rather surprising information. And I tried to make amends by telling the coworker what I had done.

Honestly, if I was applying for another job and used another manager as a reference or was applying for another job inside my agency, I would expect to word to get around quickly. That is unless I asked that manager ahead of time not to say anything. Maybe that is part of the culture in my agency.

OP, people like you create sucky work environments. Common sense should have told you to keep that information quiet. I hope KARMA bites you in the ass quite frankly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:A coworker who I used to supervise and still works in my division (of about 35 people), has been listing me as a reference on job applications. I got two calls yesterday from employers wanting to get my feedback on this coworker. So, he is applying for other jobs. No one else in the division knows about this. Should I be protecting the coworker and not reveal this information. Or, should I warn his supervisor that he's looking to leave?

My boss thought that I needed to share this type of information with his supervisor. But, after I did (after the first phone call), I felt a little guilty about not talking with the coworker first. So, after the second call, I did talk with the coworker and let him know that I had told his supervisor.

One of the jobs he applied for was within our agency -- so it was only a matter of time before this news got out. On the other hand, I'm not sure its useful to tell the supervisor. I'm confident that the employee won't be retaliated against or somehow punished for applying for another job.

I'm also a new poster. You don't know who your supervisor or your co-worker's supervisor have told, so even if the 2 supervisors are nice people, that doesn't mean that others are too. So, you can't really be confident that the employee won't be retaliated against. I agree with all the other posters, that was so mean of you. Why even talk to your boss about it in the first place? So odd. The co-worker didn't ask you to be a reference, so he either 1) trusted you or 2) was naive or 3) was young.

[Anonymous]

What is wrong with you?? Why would you even consider telling your supervisor or his? Terrible.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
I'm asking because after the fact, I did feel like I had done the wrong thing. And, I wanted to get feedback in case this ever happens again. (It has never happened to me before.)

The coworker did not ask me in advance if he could use me as a reference on job applications.

I've been at my agency a very long time and know that me sharing this information is not going to hurt him. Yet, out of discretion, I think I should've kept quiet.

My boss thought this information should be shared with management probably because he thought they should be prepared for the possibility of him leaving soon. But I'm not sure what can (or should) be done until the employee actually gives notice. But his comment made me think that, as a manager, maybe my loyalty should be more to the other managers/supervisors. On the other hand, If I get a reputation among the staff as a gossip or tattle-tale, that could hurt me professionally.

Wow, what the fuck inspired you to tattle on your co-worker? What an asshole you are.

What is it with women and their inability to keep their mouths shut?

[Anonymous]

Why are you asking now? You already told! The good news is you'll never be put in such an "awkward" situation again---no one will trust you with any sort of secret again.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I feel like there maybe just 1-2 people posting repeatedly that horrible, sucky person. Perhaps trying to bait me.

I made a mistake. I had nothing to gain from telling but I wasn't trying to undermine the co-worker. It was just that I had a piece of rather surprising information. And I tried to make amends by telling the coworker what I had done.

Honestly, if I was applying for another job and used another manager as a reference or was applying for another job inside my agency, I would expect to word to get around quickly. That is unless I asked that manager ahead of time not to say anything. Maybe that is part of the culture in my agency.

No, you had a piece of juicy information that you wanted to blab about. And I highly doubt that 2 or 3 posters have filled up four pages all by themselves...
And what could you possibly do for your coworker to make amends for what you did?!

[Anonymous]

I know the demographics of this board. Why is everyone acting so surprised? This type of behavior is what white women do best.

[Anonymous]

OP, one more vote for: terrible move. Why on earth would you share that information?

[Anonymous]

How did your coworker react when you told him you blabbed?