Etiquette regarding when you know a coworker is applying for other jobs

[Anonymous]

Wow. Whatever made you think that was a good idea? Not your business to tell.

You can now be that person that nobody trusts.

[Anonymous]

This was seriously an ass move. What if you got your coworker fired?? So many people get fired when their boss knows they're looking for another job. My job search took 2 years. Those would have been 2 awkward years with my boss.

[Anonymous]

Your coworker should have asked before he put you down as a reference; not doing so was his mistake.

Telling his supervisor that he was applying for other jobs was your mistake, though, and a big one. I'd be furious if I found out someone had done that for me. As PPs have said, the repercussions for him could have been severe.

[Anonymous]

OP is a snake.

[Anonymous]

I feel like there maybe just 1-2 people posting repeatedly that horrible, sucky person. Perhaps trying to bait me.

I made a mistake. I had nothing to gain from telling but I wasn't trying to undermine the co-worker. It was just that I had a piece of rather surprising information. And I tried to make amends by telling the coworker what I had done.

Honestly, if I was applying for another job and used another manager as a reference or was applying for another job inside my agency, I would expect to word to get around quickly. That is unless I asked that manager ahead of time not to say anything. Maybe that is part of the culture in my agency.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I feel like there maybe just 1-2 people posting repeatedly that horrible, sucky person. Perhaps trying to bait me.

I made a mistake. I had nothing to gain from telling but I wasn't trying to undermine the co-worker. It was just that I had a piece of rather surprising information. And I tried to make amends by telling the coworker what I had done.

Honestly, if I was applying for another job and used another manager as a reference or was applying for another job inside my agency, I would expect to word to get around quickly. That is unless I asked that manager ahead of time not to say anything. Maybe that is part of the culture in my agency.

Yeah and you had to go blab it to see what sort of reaction you could stir. You must be bored with your life to have done something so awful. This person's job is on the line now thanks to you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I feel like there maybe just 1-2 people posting repeatedly that horrible, sucky person. Perhaps trying to bait me.

I made a mistake. I had nothing to gain from telling but I wasn't trying to undermine the co-worker. It was just that I had a piece of rather surprising information. And I tried to make amends by telling the coworker what I had done.

Honestly, if I was applying for another job and used another manager as a reference or was applying for another job inside my agency, I would expect to word to get around quickly. That is unless I asked that manager ahead of time not to say anything. Maybe that is part of the culture in my agency.

Nah, pretty sure we're all in agreement that you effed up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why would you tell the supervisor??

Also, when you agreed to be a reference, that would have been the time to point out that you were planning on tattling.

Also, part 2. Your friend is an idiot.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why would you tell the supervisor??

Also, when you agreed to be a reference, that would have been the time to point out that you were planning on tattling.

Also, part 2. Your friend is an idiot.

THIS!

[Anonymous]

Op, do you have common sense?
Seriously, do you have common sense?

[Anonymous]

Maybe the coworker put you down and was planning to ask you but the company in question did not ask before contacting their references.

Either way, you f***ed up and are a tattle. I am glad I'm not friends with you.

[Anonymous]

She agreed she made a mistake. Why the namecalling?!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She agreed she made a mistake. Why the namecalling?!

Because it is such a big mistake. Especially for someone who is in a supervisory position. I think word will get out about OP's screw up.

OP formerly supervised the co-worker. Simple deduction would lead her figure out that the co-worker wasn't using his current direct supervisor for a reason, and maybe that it was to keep it quiet. While the co-worker should have asked, it could very well be that the calls came far earlier than he anticipated. But his failure to give her a heads up doesn't equate to her going to her boss (also the co-worker's supervisor's boss?) and then to the CW supervisor.

[Anonymous]

PP here. Yes, a big faux pas. But insults won't take it back, will they?

[Anonymous]

I would have asked you beforehand and requested that you keep it confidential...but that's because people who don't either a) like to start drama, b) are jealous of a new opportunity or c) are not so smart. If you felt like it compromised your loyalty to your colleagues, you should have told him so after the first interview and requested that he leave you off of future reference lists unless he has told his supervisor.

Ugh at you! He obviously is trying to get out of a bad situation or get into a better one. He trusted you and you betrayed him. Shame.