Flu shots / Thanksgiving with the family

[Anonymous]

Op my daughter was IUGR (I don't know if that's what your facing) and delivered three weeks early due to no growth. We did a six hour road trip at eight weeks. It wasn't so bad. I absolutely wouldn't do it if you don't feel up to it though. Stay in a hotel if at all possible. I wore her in a wrap a lot and limited other people holding her

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP is your concern traveling with a newborn, or the possible germs?

I had to travel with a 10 day old baby. Ten hour trip, split into two days -- after a c-section. Not even a little bit enjoyable, but still doable.

My concern is both since I, too, will be having a csection. From what I've been told by everyone around me ("in real life") - his mother, his sisters, my mother, etc. - this really isn't a big deal. They're all telling me that, if all goes well, by 7 weeks I'll be healed from the section, the baby will still be in super sleepy mode and will travel well in the car, and that I'll just manage the germs by telling anyone who is sniffling, etc. to back off. Nobody else seems to think it's at all a big deal.

I do plan to breastfeed so I'd prefer not to send DH and DC alone since it's for 3 nights. I'm not at all against formula feeding, I just want to give breastfeeding a shot.

To the PP who had the smallish baby despite being tall herself (and her husband being tall), was growth restriction in utero (IUGR) ever diagnosed? Were you ever told while pregnant that the baby was measuring small for his / her gestational age? Did anything special have to be done once your DC was born? NICU stay? Special formula feeding? Etc.? We're similarly baffled in hearing our baby is going to be small since I was born over 8 lbs, DH was born over 7 lbs, I'm 5'7 and my husband is 6'2 and I have a normal to curvy build (DH is very thin an has to work extra hard to put on muscle and absolutely cannot put on fat). Thanks!

That is a BIG "if." Big.

They have a nerve, telling you how it will be and what you should do for YOUR baby.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I did Christmas - one night at DH's grandparents 2 hours away - at 3 weeks postpartum and it was pure misery. I was still bleeding and sore, baby wanted to nurse constantly, no one slept, ugh. Honestly though, the worst part of this proposition is the drive. Is there any way you can fly? It's just insufferable to try to make headway in a car when you have to stop to comfort and nurse a crying baby. I understand about the germs because I'm a somewhat reformed germaphobe, but if you keep the baby in a wrap it's much easier to ensure handwashing before anyone else handles them. I agree with you that it's A LOT, but it's also only a few days and it's obviously very important to your husband.

There is no way in hell I would take a 7 week old on an airplane, with all the germs associated with that - much less during the holiday season. No way.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Stay home because you do not have a right to tell anyone they have to have a flu shot.

OP most certainly does have a right to tell them to get a flu shot. She just doesn't have a right to require it. Big difference.

[Anonymous]

I'm a mom of three...I don't think its a big deal. November is really early for flu season. Yes the flu is around but not usually running rampant. It really ramps up late Dec and into Jan. If you are really worried just have everyone wash hands before touching baby. She will likely still sleep a lot and you can set him up in a pack n play in a bedroom away from others. Another option is to baby wear. Helps keep others from touching him. I loved the baby ktan and moby. Ergo is good too.

[Anonymous]

Pp here. All my kids were small too. 5 and 6 pounders.

[Anonymous]

If you're driving and staying with family, this can be a game-time decision. No tickets or reservations or anything.

We did a trip to upstate NY at 6 weeks and it was, honestly, no big deal at all. We brought diapers, a pack and play, and my boobs, and we were all set. The drive took longer than usual with stops for nursing/changing, but we were prepared for that. Travel at off-peak times if you wind up going, for sure. (We came home Saturday night because the Sunday after thanksgiving has so much traffic the entire day.)

BUT there are other recoveries and other babies that would have made the same trip hell. See what baby you get.

(Oh, and a baby who is constitutionally small may not require extra care/feeding - she might just remain a small baby/toddler/child, etc. I know you're scared because of the possible complications, but don't borrow trouble!)

[Anonymous]

Stay home. Do not make that trip.

[Anonymous]

Just in case no one cleared this up - infants can't get a flu shot until
Six months - so you won't be vaccinating the baby for the flu this winter season. At six months the baby actually gets the flu shot once and again a month later to build immunity. The 8 week shots are dtap, hep b and something else. I would NOT take my newborn to a house with fifteen people because until
At least 8 weeks any fever over 100.5 is automatic admission to the hospital and a spinal tap bc it COULD be a bacterial infection from birth - I've always been really careful first 8 weeks to avoid that - we've traveled at 10 weeks s both kids and it wasn't too bad

[Anonymous]

Another option is for your husband to go by himself.

The wisest advice here is to decide after the baby is born.

[Anonymous]

OP again. Thanks to all for the suggestions. I think it will be a game time decision.

We've been told she's probably just constitutionally small (as opposed to IUGR) by our perinatologist and the fetal neurologist. She's measuring between 5th and 8th percentiles in all measurements (head circumference, abdominal circumference, femurs, humerus, estimate fetal weight). It's a very odd since DH was a normal size baby and is 6'2 (although rail thin) and I'm 5'8 and curvy and we were both sizable babies (DH was 7 something, I was 8 something) and all the babies in our families run average to large. We're going for growth scans every 2 weeks and all my biophysical profiles every week (measuring baby's movement, making sure she has practice breathing movements, evaluating sufficiency of amniotic fluid) and my weekly dopplers (measuring cord blood flow, etc) have been reassuring. We also recently had a fetal MRI (given that her little head is so tiny at 5th percentile) and we were told her brain looks perfectly normal, as does the rest of her body. So we're hoping that she just took after my maternal grandmother or my maternal grandfather's sister (my mom's aunt), both of whom were just very tiny people - max 5'1 but with old age had shrunk to about 4'10.

[Anonymous]

Neither of my kids got sick their first year of life. Not even sniffles. I nursed and am a SAHM, but I did not avoid people/trips/public places whatsoever.

Nursing is pretty awesome like that.

[Anonymous]

Get the flu shot while pregnant. It will help protect your baby for those first 6 months.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:FWIW, the car ride of doom that so many PPs are predicting might not be awful. It might be, but it might not be. You won't know until much closer to time whether the kid likes the car and/or you are still sore. No sense in worrying now about that aspect, especially when it sounds like DH has agreed to be flexible. (Not that I would probably be able to follow my own advice in your shoes, but theoretically it sounds good to not stress about the worst case scenario).

Forget the flu, it is not safe to have a neonate in a car seat for a prolonged period of time. You are going to be a parent. It is time you learned that you will have to do what is unpopular to do your job as a mother. The extended family can like it or lump it.

[Anonymous]

I'll add something I don't see that anyone else has mentioned - your hormones may still be wacky at 7 weeks.

I had great car kids, they could do hours without a peep. I also healed physically after each delivery pretty quickly. And I'm normally a pretty social person who can roll with this. But there is NO WAY I could have handled such a production at 7 weeks postpartum emotionally. Hormones threw me for a loop and I was a basket case. I'd cry at stupid things, feel like a failure if the toast burnt and was fiercely protective of my newborn and associated "territory."

Thankfully, DH recognized the crazy for what it was at the time and was super understanding. We stayed home and limited family visits to an hour at a time until the hormones leveled out and I found my bearings. I could not have driven 7 hours and stayed in a busy houseful of people without losing my mind.