If you got married tomorrow, how different would your bridal party be?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

You know you can change your will, right?

I reread that post multiple times, and there was no mention of will. Is it just assumed that Godparents are also chosen as the legal guardians?

I know for damn sure that my BIL will not be my children's legal guardian. We spelled out very clearly in our wills that he will NEVER get a hold of our money should we all pass. In that case, our money goes into a trust for his kids, who didn't ask to be born to him and the idiot woman he reproduced with.

You are reminding me that we are going to need to amend our will when child #2 arrives. There are other things that have changed since we first did our will, as well, but that seems like a good time to make the changes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I got married at 28---15 years ago. Definitely maid of honor would still be my older sister--but I really wanted my childhood BFF extradonaire/parnter-in-crime (met at 4 and still incredibly close in our 40s) to be a co-one. She is as close to me as my sister and an only child.

I would have still had my college buddy and I had a roommate at the time who was very close--but we've lost touch a bit---I probably would have replaced her with another college great buddy that I see a few times a year.

So--not many changes at all.

However, Godparents are another story entirely. I felt like I had to choose family so my brother and DH's brother are our boys Godfathers. But--my BIL and DH's cousin would have been much better picks. They see the boys on a regular basis and are much more involved in their lives (and better role models). I feel bad I didn't realize BIL at the time because I think he really wanted the job.

You know you can change your will, right?

Well--will and godparents are two separate issues. Our will does appoint my sister and her husband as legal guardians if something happens to both DH and I. It's awlways been that way. Godparent is a religious thing---pointless in the eyes of the law.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I got married when I was 26. My bridal party consisted of:

My BFF from high school
My BFF from college
2 other close friends from college
My close co-worker who was also good friends with my dh

My BFF from college is the only one I talk to regularly. The other 3 I see on Facebook and talk to once a year. My high school BFF maybe once every 2 months?

If I got married again today, there's no way this is what my bridal party would look like! I have two SILs now, so that would be a factor. I also didn't think I would fall so far from some of them (btw: we are all amicable, just busy with our respective lives)

Would yours be different?

I only had my niece as a flower girl and my nephew as a ring bearer. They are 21 and 17 now, so too old. Ergo, no attendants.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I got married when I was 26. My bridal party consisted of:

My BFF from high school
My BFF from college
2 other close friends from college
My close co-worker who was also good friends with my dh

My BFF from college is the only one I talk to regularly. The other 3 I see on Facebook and talk to once a year. My high school BFF maybe once every 2 months?

If I got married again today, there's no way this is what my bridal party would look like! I have two SILs now, so that would be a factor. I also didn't think I would fall so far from some of them (btw: we are all amicable, just busy with our respective lives)

Would yours be different?

I only had my niece as a flower girl and my nephew as a ring bearer. They are 21 and 17 now, so too old. Ergo, no attendants.

Great idea! If they are old enough, its great. If not, then not.

Asked my SIL to be in our wedding. Her response: "well, what would we be weeeeeering?" My response: "welcome to the family!" Holy crap.

[Anonymous]

I didn't have a bridal party at all. I'd do everything the same.

[Anonymous]

If I got married tomorrow I would skip the entire big DC wedding I had and just have a tiny wedding with a few close family members.

[Anonymous]

I had three bridesmaids then. I'm only close to one of them now, and she'd be my matron of honor. I would only have one other attendant, someone I've known for only two years.

Of course, this begs the question of whether I'd marry the same guy again. Jury's still out on that one.

[Anonymous]

Absolutely the same on my side, my best friend since age 14, my sisters and his sister.

His side would be completely different except for my brothers. He has not had contact with any of his guy friends in YEARS.

Married 19 years.

[Anonymous]

I had 4 and am barely in touch with any of them including SIL. I wouldn't have had bridesmaids at all, would have preferred a much smaller wedding in general.

[Anonymous]

I had 1 MOH and 3 bridesmaids and would change them ALL.

First off, let me preface this by saying that out of the 4, I had been in 2 of their weddings. One of the weddings, I actually planned, did invitations and bouquets and floral arrangements for (I am NOT a planner or a floral designer but did it as a favor because they lacked the funds to hire a professional).

What did I get in return?

My MOH was a complete flake and did nothing that she was supposed to do. I had to beg her to help me do stuff and to accompany me places. Me and her were barely even speaking on my wedding day but have since made up. We are not as close as we used to be, though.

My bridesmaid whose wedding I planned got pregnant after the dresses were ordered so it was a headache trying to reorder a bigger dress that had to be altered because by the time I actually walked down the aisle, she was 8 months. She was in a perpetual bad mood and of course, everything was about her for the entire time.

Another bridesmaid was my cousin who was too busy trying to be cute and flirt with the groomsmen (yes, all of them). I had to help pay for her stuff because she never had money for anything. She just became engaged (NOT to any of the groomsmen, he he) and she just asked me to be in her wedding. HELL NO was my response.

I have no real beef with my last bridesmaid other than the fact that she was virtually absent for the entire time leading up to the wedding.

So yea, I would just go to Vegas and save the money and the headache.

[Anonymous]

Same bridesmaids, plus one person who has become a dear friend. Mine were my sister, my SIL, two childhood friends and a college friend. Still as close, or closer, to all of them. That's a nice thing to think about.

I imagine there would be a little reshuffling among groomsmen.

I'm sad to say I'm not in contact with my flower girls. I should fix that.

[Anonymous]

I would replace only one of three bridesmaids. The other two girls are my still my best friends. Now on DH's side, he would have no family (he had his brothers as their groomsmen). In fact, 99% of his family wouldn't be invited at all. Oh well...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I didn't have a bridal party at all. I'd do everything the same.

Smart girl!

Who ARE these catty btches, anyway?

[Anonymous]

I'm divorced and I'd pretty much scratch the entire thing. If I were ever to marry again, it would be alone on an island or something. Never doing the big expensive public farce again. Total waste.

[Anonymous]

I guess I'm the only one posting who had a largish wedding (160 guests) who would do it all over again? Heck, there are 25 more people I wish I had invited. Married 18 years this year.