what do you say to neighbors about why you are choosing private vs the local public?

[Anonymous]

My kids are in public but I work with plenty of people whose kids are in private. Both seem to have their plusses and minuses. No is completely 100% happy all the time. Those that love their private still contemplate the financing or the lack of neighborhood friends. Those that love the public wonder what they are missing. We all make choices along the way.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"We thought it would be a great fit for our DC."

I understand where you are coming from because I have gotten negative comments from people as well. A woman at the park actually said, "do you honestly think the money is worth it?" (And not in a nice way). I mean, clearly I think it's worth it, so the subtext is that I some insufferable snob for sending my kid to private school. There's no point to engaging because a defensive person will take anything you say as a referendum on her choice. Just smile, deflect, move on.

While you probably are not a snob, my first thought about people who send their kids to private schools is that they are elitist snobs. Right or wrong it is the first thought I have.

I am the original poster - and no, not a snob, and was hoping to get answers that had nothing to do with snobery or money, bc it's not about that. It's about thinking that the education your kids will get (and what that affords in life - take that how you want) will be superior than what the public system offers, and the price attached to that is that you need to pay for it. It is quite simple. But not all people can handle that answer.

Wow, you are a total twat. No wonder your neighbors don't like you. But I highly recommend you give that answer to all who even look your way.

I'm not the OP, but the OP is correct on this point. If private schools didn't offer better education than public options, nobody would pay private tuition. The fact that many do pay private tuition proves the point, without a silly semantic debate over what defines "better."

[Anonymous]

You learn who your friends are. I lived in a neighborhood where we were the only family that went private for k. The whole neighborhood ousted me and my dd. we were no longer invited to parties Halloween etc. it was hurtful to my dd. we eventually and thankfully moved!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"We thought it would be a great fit for our DC."

I understand where you are coming from because I have gotten negative comments from people as well. A woman at the park actually said, "do you honestly think the money is worth it?" (And not in a nice way). I mean, clearly I think it's worth it, so the subtext is that I some insufferable snob for sending my kid to private school. There's no point to engaging because a defensive person will take anything you say as a referendum on her choice. Just smile, deflect, move on.

While you probably are not a snob, my first thought about people who send their kids to private schools is that they are elitist snobs. Right or wrong it is the first thought I have.

I am the original poster - and no, not a snob, and was hoping to get answers that had nothing to do with snobery or money, bc it's not about that. It's about thinking that the education your kids will get (and what that affords in life - take that how you want) will be superior than what the public system offers, and the price attached to that is that you need to pay for it. It is quite simple. But not all people can handle that answer.

Wow, you are a total twat. No wonder your neighbors don't like you. But I highly recommend you give that answer to all who even look your way.

I'm not the OP, but the OP is correct on this point. If private schools didn't offer better education than public options, nobody would pay private tuition. The fact that many do pay private tuition proves the point, without a silly semantic debate over what defines "better."

That's ridiculous! There are plenty of private schools that do not offer better education than public options. People choose private for many reasons - some want "prestige" and think paying more $ makes something better, some want a religious element, some want single gender education, some want small classes b/c their child is shy, some want automatic entrée to sports teams. Granted, whatever the reason, the person choosing the private BELIEVES it is better (for them) but it does not actually make the private OBJECTIVELY better.

In addition, there are some 2nd and 3rd rate private schools that offer inferior academics to those offered at top area publics.

None of this means there is anything wrong with choosing private. You just shouldn't fool yourself into believing that just because someone chooses it and pays for it, it's automatically better.

[Anonymous]

'm not the OP, but the OP is correct on this point. If private schools didn't offer better education than public options, nobody would pay private tuition. The fact that many do pay private tuition proves the point, without a silly semantic debate over what defines "better.

Wait. So just because something is expensive, it's better? You are a salesperson's dream come true.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm a public parent (though I briefly toyed with the idea of private). I'm here because the private school online fights are really entertaining and snippy. I think the public school parents are a more earnest bunch, so the fights are more full of graphs and such.

so true!

[Anonymous]

In addition, there are some 2nd and 3rd rate private schools that offer inferior academics to those offered at top area publics.

Not even 2nd and 3rd rate. I taught in a private that was considered one of the top private schools in Seattle. Tuition was about $32,000 a year. I was still in school. I didn't even have a Bachelors Degree at the time. The parents had no idea that their 2nd graders were being taught by a teacher with no degree and no experience other than a semester of student teaching. That would never happen in any public school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I really don't know why anyone needs to apologize for being a social climber who uses their kids to spend time with others with money. You use any means available to get ahead in this area.

Uh oh. Here we go with the public school "I'm so damn jealous Mom." Here's the deal. I'm the product of a stellar public school undergrad and graduate program. Problem now? DCPS sucks. Oh, and I'm successful as hell and make more money than I know what to do with. Social climbing, no? Wanting the best education for my children and DCPS simply ain't it? Uh, yes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm a public parent (though I briefly toyed with the idea of private). I'm here because the private school online fights are really entertaining and snippy. I think the public school parents are a more earnest bunch, so the fights are more full of graphs and such.

so true!

That's because your charts and graphs are all you have.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I really don't know why anyone needs to apologize for being a social climber who uses their kids to spend time with others with money. You use any means available to get ahead in this area.

Uh oh. Here we go with the public school "I'm so damn jealous Mom." Here's the deal. I'm the product of a stellar public school undergrad and graduate program. Problem now? DCPS sucks. Oh, and I'm successful as hell and make more money than I know what to do with. Social climbing, no? Wanting the best education for my children and DCPS simply ain't it? Uh, yes.

+1

[Anonymous]

I only had one neighbor who really gave me a hard time. I tried everything to be nice and said it was no reflection on the excellent public elementary but we wanted a smaller school, we wanted a religious school, we wanted one that went through high school, etc. She would not let it drop and year after year asked if we were ready to transfer to the local public yet. She actually did a great job of sealing the deal for us!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm a public parent (though I briefly toyed with the idea of private). I'm here because the private school online fights are really entertaining and snippy. I think the public school parents are a more earnest bunch, so the fights are more full of graphs and such.

so true!

That's because your charts and graphs are all you have.

Maybe. But we are more earnest! And your post proved it...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"We thought it would be a great fit for our DC."

I understand where you are coming from because I have gotten negative comments from people as well. A woman at the park actually said, "do you honestly think the money is worth it?" (And not in a nice way). I mean, clearly I think it's worth it, so the subtext is that I some insufferable snob for sending my kid to private school. There's no point to engaging because a defensive person will take anything you say as a referendum on her choice. Just smile, deflect, move on.

While you probably are not a snob, my first thought about people who send their kids to private schools is that they are elitist snobs. Right or wrong it is the first thought I have.

I am the original poster - and no, not a snob, and was hoping to get answers that had nothing to do with snobery or money, bc it's not about that. It's about thinking that the education your kids will get (and what that affords in life - take that how you want) will be superior than what the public system offers, and the price attached to that is that you need to pay for it. It is quite simple. But not all people can handle that answer.

Wow, you are a total twat. No wonder your neighbors don't like you. But I highly recommend you give that answer to all who even look your way.

I'm not the OP, but the OP is correct on this point. If private schools didn't offer better education than public options, nobody would pay private tuition. The fact that many do pay private tuition proves the point, without a silly semantic debate over what defines "better."

That's ridiculous! There are plenty of private schools that do not offer better education than public options. People choose private for many reasons - some want "prestige" and think paying more $ makes something better, some want a religious element, some want single gender education, some want small classes b/c their child is shy, some want automatic entrée to sports teams. Granted, whatever the reason, the person choosing the private BELIEVES it is better (for them) but it does not actually make the private OBJECTIVELY better.

In addition, there are some 2nd and 3rd rate private schools that offer inferior academics to those offered at top area publics.

None of this means there is anything wrong with choosing private. You just shouldn't fool yourself into believing that just because someone chooses it and pays for it, it's automatically better.

"OBJECTIVELY" better is exactly the semantic debate that I was opting out of. There's not really any such thing, which is why the marketplace definition is correct.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You learn who your friends are. I lived in a neighborhood where we were the only family that went private for k. The whole neighborhood ousted me and my dd. we were no longer invited to parties Halloween etc. it was hurtful to my dd. we eventually and thankfully moved!

How do you know it had anything to do with the fact that your DD went to private school? How could you possibly know that?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I really don't know why anyone needs to apologize for being a social climber who uses their kids to spend time with others with money. You use any means available to get ahead in this area.

Uh oh. Here we go with the public school "I'm so damn jealous Mom." Here's the deal. I'm the product of a stellar public school undergrad and graduate program. Problem now? DCPS sucks. Oh, and I'm successful as hell and make more money than I know what to do with. Social climbing, no? Wanting the best education for my children and DCPS simply ain't it? Uh, yes.

Please keep your kid in private school. You will be doing us all a favor, except for the other private school parents.