Why save for retirement if medicaid will cover your costs!?!?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I can't even give my relative who is in assisted living a present, because whatever I give her will be stolen from her almost immediately. By the staff, by fellow residents - who knows. She knows, but she isn't willing to try to be moved and says it would be the same anywhere.

I switched to flowers but she asked me not to bring those either because it causes too much envy.

Think I've posted this before, but I gave my grandmother a framed family photo -- and came back the next day to find the photo on her bedstand, and the (seriously $5) frame gone.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DDT (dichlorodiphenyltrichloroethane)
Scientists have already found a strong potential link between pesticides and Parkinson’s disease. Now, a preliminary study released in January suggests that the pesticide DDT, which degrades so slowly that it continues to linger in the environment more than 40 years after the U.S. Environmental Protection Agency banned its use in the U.S., may also contribute to Alzheimer’s.

+1 and think about all the other chemicals, regulated or unregulated that enter our environment on a normal basis that we have no idea what the long-term effects are.

[Anonymous]

My mom is in a nice assisted living facility in Illinois that is funded by Medicaid and SS. She has the early stages of dementia and we were told she cannot live alone (she was calling the cops constantly, thinking she was being followed). She lived with my sister's family for awhile and was miserable because she didn't like being around little kids. After moving her the assisted living facility, her mental faculties improved greatly. I think living alone made her more confused. I don't know how things will shake out once her disease progresses, but for now it's working out well.

My mom always had problems with paranoia and was terrible with money, both of which contributed to my parents' divorce. It's really tough on everyone when you have a family member like this, who just cannot or will not take care of themselves. I agree it isn't fair that she has a warm bed while others may not, but I am so grateful this service exists. It sounds terrible, but she's been a financial drain on everyone her whole life--at least now I can save for retirement so I won't be a financial drain on my own children.

And while I know not everyone feels this way, I wouldn't want to live in a place that didn't have some level of protection like this, and I would gladly pay higher taxes to have more services for those in need.

[Anonymous]

PP, can I ask the name of the place, or at least the location? My ILs are in Illinois and in their early 80s, and we are starting to look for a place for them...No savings and no pension of any kind...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My mom is in a nice assisted living facility in Illinois that is funded by Medicaid and SS. She has the early stages of dementia and we were told she cannot live alone (she was calling the cops constantly, thinking she was being followed). She lived with my sister's family for awhile and was miserable because she didn't like being around little kids. After moving her the assisted living facility, her mental faculties improved greatly. I think living alone made her more confused. I don't know how things will shake out once her disease progresses, but for now it's working out well.

My mom always had problems with paranoia and was terrible with money, both of which contributed to my parents' divorce. It's really tough on everyone when you have a family member like this, who just cannot or will not take care of themselves. I agree it isn't fair that she has a warm bed while others may not, but I am so grateful this service exists. It sounds terrible, but she's been a financial drain on everyone her whole life--at least now I can save for retirement so I won't be a financial drain on my own children.

And while I know not everyone feels this way, I wouldn't want to live in a place that didn't have some level of protection like this, and I would gladly pay higher taxes to have more services for those in need.

I think you mean she is in a nursing home, as Medicaid does not cover assisted living - only skilled nursing.

[Anonymous]

OP you are a greedy witch, I see right through your post. You're worried about your inheritance - why should your parents use their savings on their retirement when it's supposed to go to you? Why can't they live for free in a shitty medicaid approved facility like others? You talk about your culture taking care of the elderly, yet make excuses as to why your parents can't live with you. You're selfish and gross. Good thing your parents have that nest egg, they're going to need it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP you are a greedy witch, I see right through your post. You're worried about your inheritance - why should your parents use their savings on their retirement when it's supposed to go to you? Why can't they live for free in a shitty medicaid approved facility like others? You talk about your culture taking care of the elderly, yet make excuses as to why your parents can't live with you. You're selfish and gross. Good thing your parents have that nest egg, they're going to need it.

There is no inheritance if you're living in a Medicaid-approve facility, pp. They bankrupt you before benefits kick in.

[Anonymous]

Are you nuts??

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As PPs noted, life on Medicaid is anything but sweet.

Curious, OP, if your cultural tradition includes caring for aging parents in exchange for inheritance, why is Medicaid an issue at all?

The above scenario works in the homeland, where typically the daughter or daughter in-law does not work outside of the home. It won't work for us here becauseboth my brother and I work and therefore can't provide the care. My parents never thought, does anyone?, that they would end up in a position to worry about this. So as they built up an inheritance for us, due to misinformation, they missed or misunderstood how medicaid works. They have a decent savings - a fully paid house, car and about 100-150K savings. I just wished they enjoyed life more and didn't feel the need to save this money for me and my brother - esp since we are both working and contributing to our own retirement plans.

I didn't realize that the care a medicaid recipient receives is different. My husbands undle was in a nursing home for rehab, ended up dying there, and he was self pay. I thought it was a horrible place, as a PP described, sad, old people left in wheelchairs in hallways, dilapidated rec area with various games that didn't work. His estate went to his care and ti was awful.

So why not tell them that you don't need the money they have saved, and that they should use it to spend on themselves? Or have them move in with you and use their money to pay for their expenses?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP you are a greedy witch, I see right through your post. You're worried about your inheritance - why should your parents use their savings on their retirement when it's supposed to go to you? Why can't they live for free in a shitty medicaid approved facility like others? You talk about your culture taking care of the elderly, yet make excuses as to why your parents can't live with you. You're selfish and gross. Good thing your parents have that nest egg, they're going to need it.

Coming from a miserable loser.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My mom is in a nice assisted living facility in Illinois that is funded by Medicaid and SS. She has the early stages of dementia and we were told she cannot live alone (she was calling the cops constantly, thinking she was being followed). She lived with my sister's family for awhile and was miserable because she didn't like being around little kids. After moving her the assisted living facility, her mental faculties improved greatly. I think living alone made her more confused. I don't know how things will shake out once her disease progresses, but for now it's working out well.

My mom always had problems with paranoia and was terrible with money, both of which contributed to my parents' divorce. It's really tough on everyone when you have a family member like this, who just cannot or will not take care of themselves. I agree it isn't fair that she has a warm bed while others may not, but I am so grateful this service exists. It sounds terrible, but she's been a financial drain on everyone her whole life--at least now I can save for retirement so I won't be a financial drain on my own children.

And while I know not everyone feels this way, I wouldn't want to live in a place that didn't have some level of protection like this, and I would gladly pay higher taxes to have more services for those in need.

I think you mean she is in a nursing home, as Medicaid does not cover assisted living - only skilled nursing.

It may be different in Illinois than it is in our area. We were told it doesn't pay for assisted living but we are trying to get into an income based one. There are options but it is very very hard.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My mom is in a nice assisted living facility in Illinois that is funded by Medicaid and SS. She has the early stages of dementia and we were told she cannot live alone (she was calling the cops constantly, thinking she was being followed). She lived with my sister's family for awhile and was miserable because she didn't like being around little kids. After moving her the assisted living facility, her mental faculties improved greatly. I think living alone made her more confused. I don't know how things will shake out once her disease progresses, but for now it's working out well.

My mom always had problems with paranoia and was terrible with money, both of which contributed to my parents' divorce. It's really tough on everyone when you have a family member like this, who just cannot or will not take care of themselves. I agree it isn't fair that she has a warm bed while others may not, but I am so grateful this service exists. It sounds terrible, but she's been a financial drain on everyone her whole life--at least now I can save for retirement so I won't be a financial drain on my own children.

And while I know not everyone feels this way, I wouldn't want to live in a place that didn't have some level of protection like this, and I would gladly pay higher taxes to have more services for those in need.

I think you mean she is in a nursing home, as Medicaid does not cover assisted living - only skilled nursing.

It may be different in Illinois than it is in our area. We were told it doesn't pay for assisted living but we are trying to get into an income based one. There are options but it is very very hard.

It is a federal program. It does not cover assisted living anywhere.

[Anonymous]

They should cash out. Hide the cash or buy physical gold. Pretend like they spent it , lost it or gambled it away.
Spend or give you the gold as an inheritance . Get with the freebee program?

[Anonymous]

^^^Bury the gold and give you a treasure map for inheritance ?
Lol

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:They should cash out. Hide the cash or buy physical gold. Pretend like they spent it , lost it or gambled it away.
Spend or give you the gold as an inheritance . Get with the freebee program?

That's just it. If they wanted OP to have the money, they'd give it to her now while they're alive and live off of Medicaid. That is not what they've chosen to do, they want to spend their retirement savings on their retirement and live comfortably (as they should). Isn't it obvious that OP is pissed the money's not going to her?