Children stigma

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you are dating young guys then you cannot blame them for being shocked. It's not like you are dating older men who may be divorced and has children. It's good thing that you found that out now. There are so many awful things happening to children especially by the mothers' boyfriends. Your child should always come first.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:Are you in DC? Most late 20s/early 30s guys in DC are freaked out by the idea of kids of their own, much less being a step-parent. You are wasting your time if you don't disclose the kid upfront. It should be in your profile if you are online dating. If you don't want to disclose it for privacy or safety reasons, then you should be proactively looking for guys in their late thirties or single fathers.

That is dangerous advice. Putting kids in an online dating profile can attract predators for women.

Eh, I'm sure the danger is minimal, and you'd have to be careful to protect your kid from abusers in any event. Keeping it out of your profile is not a surefire way to prevent abuse.

Do you have children?

Yes, I have children, and if I were to date online I would prominently discuss how my child was my #1 priority. I also put pictures of my kid all over Facebook, ZOMG!!!

Facebook is friends & family. Online dating is strangers. In particular, strange men. Apples and oranges.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:The norm around here for professionals is to have kids in their mid thirties or later so yeah, well educated men are surprised if you have a kid. Tell them prior to the first date so they know. Will prevent the deer in headlights look.

This is not the norm. It's not unusual and it's more common than at many other places, but it's not the norm. Most professionals, even in this area, have thir first child in their early thirties. Stop pretending otherwise.

I totally agree. I work FT and earn around 180k as does my husband. Most of my friends are in the same category. Only 2 people had children starting in their late 30s. I was done at 32. I don't know anyone who had kids prior to 23, but even in my children's upper middle class elementary school the "old" mom scenario is certainly not the majority.

All the moms I know in DC started in their mid 30s. And there is a big difference between having a kid at say 33 and 28 and divorced already.

Same for the people I know and at my kid's private school. Don't know anyone who had kids earlier than mid thirties.

[Anonymous]

You guys could get out more if you only know people who had kids over 35. I know people who had kids as teens, 20s, 30s, and 40s because you know, that's life and people are different. And before some elitist references private school friends (as if that matters), there are upper middle class people with these stats.

End of rant.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Date older men OP. Or military.

NP. Where do military men hang out?

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:The norm around here for professionals is to have kids in their mid thirties or later so yeah, well educated men are surprised if you have a kid. Tell them prior to the first date so they know. Will prevent the deer in headlights look.

This is not the norm. It's not unusual and it's more common than at many other places, but it's not the norm. Most professionals, even in this area, have thir first child in their early thirties. Stop pretending otherwise.

I totally agree. I work FT and earn around 180k as does my husband. Most of my friends are in the same category. Only 2 people had children starting in their late 30s. I was done at 32. I don't know anyone who had kids prior to 23, but even in my children's upper middle class elementary school the "old" mom scenario is certainly not the majority.

All the moms I know in DC started in their mid 30s. And there is a big difference between having a kid at say 33 and 28 and divorced already.

Same for the people I know and at my kid's private school. Don't know anyone who had kids earlier than mid thirties.

Really? My children attend a private school in DC and there are a large amount of women who married men 10-15 years older than them and had babies in their 20s.

There are a few dual income prof families, but more than not young women with successful older men.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The norm around here for professionals is to have kids in their mid thirties or later so yeah, well educated men are surprised if you have a kid. Tell them prior to the first date so they know. Will prevent the deer in headlights look.

This is not the norm. It's not unusual and it's more common than at many other places, but it's not the norm. Most professionals, even in this area, have thir first child in their early thirties. Stop pretending otherwise.

I totally agree. I work FT and earn around 180k as does my husband. Most of my friends are in the same category. Only 2 people had children starting in their late 30s. I was done at 32. I don't know anyone who had kids prior to 23, but even in my children's upper middle class elementary school the "old" mom scenario is certainly not the majority.

All the moms I know in DC started in their mid 30s. And there is a big difference between having a kid at say 33 and 28 and divorced already.

Same for the people I know and at my kid's private school. Don't know anyone who had kids earlier than mid thirties.

Really? My children attend a private school in DC and there are a large amount of women who married men 10-15 years older than them and had babies in their 20s.

There are a few dual income prof families, but more than not young women with successful older men.

yup, gold diggers. give it a few years and check back to tell us how many of the women are separated/divorced or are just plain in unhappy marriages and are actively posting on DCUM

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:The norm around here for professionals is to have kids in their mid thirties or later so yeah, well educated men are surprised if you have a kid. Tell them prior to the first date so they know. Will prevent the deer in headlights look.

This is not the norm. It's not unusual and it's more common than at many other places, but it's not the norm. Most professionals, even in this area, have thir first child in their early thirties. Stop pretending otherwise.

I totally agree. I work FT and earn around 180k as does my husband. Most of my friends are in the same category. Only 2 people had children starting in their late 30s. I was done at 32. I don't know anyone who had kids prior to 23, but even in my children's upper middle class elementary school the "old" mom scenario is certainly not the majority.

All the moms I know in DC started in their mid 30s. And there is a big difference between having a kid at say 33 and 28 and divorced already.

Same for the people I know and at my kid's private school. Don't know anyone who had kids earlier than mid thirties.

Really? My children attend a private school in DC and there are a large amount of women who married men 10-15 years older than them and had babies in their 20s.

There are a few dual income prof families, but more than not young women with successful older men.

yup, gold diggers. give it a few years and check back to tell us how many of the women are separated/divorced or are just plain in unhappy marriages and are actively posting on DCUM

Does not change the fact that there are numerous young moms in my kids school. Most of these men are probably on their second marriage anyways. #2 usually has more staying power than the first. Especially when the husband is 55 and the wife is 35 and had her babies early enough in life that her body is not a disaster zone.