Frank Discussion and Honest Answers on tuition affordability

[Anonymous]

There are schools for less than $30k.

Seneca academy, Christ episcopal, mater dei, etc

They can give you smaller classes, or individual attention or a boys education.

None of these have everything Lab would have but there are options but you will need outside services which increases the cost by another $8-$10k.

I am not saying they are the answer but that is the route we took.

I am not the rude poster from above.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We have made cuts in other areas and live really like paupers (or "the millionaire next door"). We live "poorer" than most other people we know, but to us, it's important to send her to the private school. For example, we have no tv at home, no internet at home, drive two paid-for cars, I wear the same clothes from Target basically like every day, and we do a lot of things that other people eschewed on the "what cheap things have you seen people do" thread.

That said, I have another friend who lives pretty "high on the hog" and he was saying, "We just couldn't afford private school," and I really had to sit on my hands and bite my tongue not to say anything.

What will you do when your car conks out and you need to buy a new one? When your roof starts leaking and you get the bad news that you need to replace it? What will you do when your mom gets sick and you have to buy multiple airplane tickets out to see her through her chemotherapy and help her get moved into a nursing home? What are you going to tell your child when homework assignments start coming home which require access to the internet? Where are you going to get the extra cash when tuition goes up?

How are you going to pay for your health care 35 years from now?

You can't really afford it either.

Also, if you do a lot of the things people "eschew" on the "what cheap things have you seen people do" thread, you may also be a petty thief but that is another matter.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We have made cuts in other areas and live really like paupers (or "the millionaire next door"). We live "poorer" than most other people we know, but to us, it's important to send her to the private school. For example, we have no tv at home, no internet at home, drive two paid-for cars, I wear the same clothes from Target basically like every day, and we do a lot of things that other people eschewed on the "what cheap things have you seen people do" thread.

That said, I have another friend who lives pretty "high on the hog" and he was saying, "We just couldn't afford private school," and I really had to sit on my hands and bite my tongue not to say anything.

What will you do when your car conks out and you need to buy a new one? When your roof starts leaking and you get the bad news that you need to replace it? What will you do when your mom gets sick and you have to buy multiple airplane tickets out to see her through her chemotherapy and help her get moved into a nursing home? What are you going to tell your child when homework assignments start coming home which require access to the internet? Where are you going to get the extra cash when tuition goes up?

How are you going to pay for your health care 35 years from now?

You can't really afford it either.

Also, if you do a lot of the things people "eschew" on the "what cheap things have you seen people do" thread, you may also be a petty thief but that is another matter.

OP here - this is exactly how I feel only you were able to explain it without making it sound like sour grapes. What all the replies have shown me is that we are not off-base in thinking/believing that we cannot afford private for our DS.

To the PP who suggested Mater Dei - good luck with that!! although all boys, its Catholic (as am I) and catholic schools are notoriously unequipped to help ANYONE with any kind of special need including minor difficulties with attention. They are also a school that accepts based on legacy - no matter how much they try to deny it. I know a few boys who are neurotypical, great kids but have gotten turned down year after year due to lack of space and legacy "requirements".

[Anonymous]

I mention Mater Dei as a school that was less expensive. While it is hard to get into I do know non legacy kids that go there. It's amazing how attentive a boy can be if they are allowed to run around.

It's not for every kid - just another option - that fit some boys needs. Especially a boy that may need another year to mature without the stigma of being held back - of course there are the people that will make fun of the Mater Dei boys for being older. It's sad how adults are comfortable mocking kids.

[Anonymous]

Also,if you are looking for HS - schools that are less expensive but can handle kids with LD are St. johns and Good counsel. They have special programs. I guess those are not Independent though.

[Anonymous]

Please PP. Mater Dei is not a school for kids with needs. This goes beyond the stigma of being held back, its about schools that accomodate ADHD, ASD, MERLD, Executive Functioning, anxiety etc...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Please PP. Mater Dei is not a school for kids with needs. This goes beyond the stigma of being held back, its about schools that accomodate ADHD, ASD, MERLD, Executive Functioning, anxiety etc...

Not all kids are created equal. If you think they are dedicated to letting legacy's in but they don't let the ADD/dyslexic brother in you are wrong. My son does not go to Mater Dei but I know lots of kids that do. We go to a similar school and yes dylexia, anxieties, ADD, executive functioning, etc. are things that can be dealt with in small school setting with support from the outside.

It is an option. I don't know why people have to jump all over Mater Dei. Forget I mentioned it. How about the other less expensive options I mentioned. Let's discuss them. Oh no Mater Dei is so much more fun to discuss. This is the SN forum not the Private/Independent.

[Anonymous]

If you're renting, you aren't really stuck in that area. We had our kids in Montgomery Country Schools and absolutely hated them. We moved three months before our lease was up and bought a home in Fairfax. We were much, much happier with the schools. It sounds like you like the area you are living in. But it might be worth considering a move if you are that unhappy with the school.

[Anonymous]

PP -- why did you hate montgomery county schools, and why are you much happier in Fairfax?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:PP -- why did you hate montgomery county schools, and why are you much happier in Fairfax?

Definitely should have clarified. We were not in a great Montgomery County School. When we moved back to D.C., we decided to give Montgomery County a try. We had lived in NoVA twice and in the District once. We didn't know anything at all about Maryland. On the advise of a friend, we rented a townhouse in Germantown while we looked for a home to buy. We have lived all over this country and overseas. I've always been able to find at least something to like about every single place we've lived - until Germantown. We hated absolutely everything about it. We might have been a happier in other parts of the County. But after living in Germantown for nine months, both of us wanted to be as far away from Maryland as possible.

I had kids at both Seneca Valley High School and Waters Landing Elementary. Waters Landing was so bad that I pulled my child out and homeschooled until we moved. And I am NOT the homeschooling type. Again, I'm sure our experience would have been much different had we lived someplace besides Germantown. We loved the schools in Fairfax!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you're renting, you aren't really stuck in that area. We had our kids in Montgomery Country Schools and absolutely hated them. We moved three months before our lease was up and bought a home in Fairfax. We were much, much happier with the schools. It sounds like you like the area you are living in. But it might be worth considering a move if you are that unhappy with the school.

....Just signed a 2 yr lease
....NT child has sacrificed a ton already for SN DS, so moving him again as he's about to enter HS is out of the question

I do appreciate the idea however, its a good one but just not an option for us right now.

I think we're going to increase tutoring days and find a great summer camp program.

[Anonymous]

PS - this is OP/PP - forgot to mention that we are in what is considered the top MoCo school pyramid already.

[Anonymous]

PP -- so your top MOCO school isnt helping your SN child?

Can i ask what SN child's issues are?

[Anonymous]

We had two kids in FCPS -- gifted centers nonetheless. Hated it. Income about 150K. About 30K goes toward school...and each year it gets more expensive.

The tradeoff: our cars are old, I color my own hair, no cable, no smartphones, no fancy meals....But the quality of our life -- so much better since leaving public. For us, it is worth it -- and we really don't feel like it's a big sacrifice.

[Anonymous]

We have had 3 foster children public, which was a huge failure for years, even with advocates and experts.

After 3 years of deplorable public school special education, we went the private route with two of the kids. Just about $40,000 per kid. Two separate schools and guess what? Not that big of a difference from public.

Smaller classes but the same old story. Homework is still a disaster and neither kids is improving much....
Private isn't always the answer. U less it is an EXCELLENT fit, forget it