At odds with spouse ove how much house we can afford

[Anonymous]

why don't you each give in $250,000?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I vote this topic line in for the "1st world problems" thread!

First world problems? 1% problems!!!!

i'd be spending $2-$2.5 if i had this kind of income.

Agreed! That's the amount I would spend too if my HHI was 1+M. Her husband is shooting for 1.2M house which I feel is way under for what they pull in.

[Anonymous]

Find 'the right house' then worry about the price. 500G isn't that big of a spread, expeciallly for a home that has been sitting on the market longer, which may settle at a much lower price.

Get to know the market in your area of interest and it will become clear to you. What you need vs what you want is relative to how you want to live.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I vote this topic line in for the "1st world problems" thread!

First world problems? 1% problems!!!!

i'd be spending $2-$2.5 if i had this kind of income.

ITA!! But why do you say that/feel that way and what are the numbers to support this?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I vote this topic line in for the "1st world problems" thread!

First world problems? 1% problems!!!!

i'd be spending $2-$2.5 if i had this kind of income.

Agreed! That's the amount I would spend too if my HHI was 1+M. Her husband is shooting for 1.2M house which I feel is way under for what they pull in.

By what formula?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I vote this topic line in for the "1st world problems" thread!

First world problems? 1% problems!!!!

i'd be spending $2-$2.5 if i had this kind of income.

Agreed! That's the amount I would spend too if my HHI was 1+M. Her husband is shooting for 1.2M house which I feel is way under for what they pull in.

By what formula?

Can't say for fairfax but clolsed in N arlington, 1.2M will net you barely a decent new built but certainly not the privacy of a 2.4M place. No formulas needed but if you want, there are lots of "how much house can I afford" calculators online. Every mortgage website pretty much has one.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:[I know tomorrow is never guaranteed, and know too many horror stories about finally reaching retirement and having savings to travel etc. and not having the health, or spouse to do it with. You can't take it with you.

But that's not a horror story, really. We should all hope for extra money left over at the end of our lives.

And as to your point of enjoying life while you're alive--it may be that your husband wants more liquid assets, which, by the way, are more available to do fun things with. In the end, a house is just a house. And no matter where you end up in your price range, you're going to end up with an awesome house compared to most. If you go with the "lower end" house (which is not low-end in the least), you could have money for a second home. Or for much more travel. Or for making sizable donations to the causes you believe in. Probably all of the above, in fact. Just deciding you want the more expensive house because you can afford it seems so shallow and shortsighted.

Take the time to sit down with your husband and figure out your joint goals in life.

[Anonymous]

700k is too far to bridge. Find an actual option (or a few) which physically demonstrate the difference it would mean for your family and lifestyle now and over the years.

A realtor would be more than happy to work with you on this. BUT, you have got to come down from the 700k. Make it 1.3 and your husband may be persuaded.

Men are visual. Show him something real that respects his more conservative approach

[Anonymous]

Maybe he just doesn't want to be seen as the type of person who spends $1.7mm on a house.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
Men are visual. Show him something real that respects his more conservative approach

Yes, physically seeing different options, trying the commutes etc., will likely resonate more than a conversation. Thanks.

[Anonymous]

OP, are you willing to use all $750K as a down payment? If so, then a $1.5M house results in a 750K mortgage. That's about $5K/month, give or take. What are you paying for housing monthly now?

DH and I carry a $700K mortgage, and we make "only" $300K. Have 2 kids in daycare, no student loans. We are still able to contribute $35K/year to retirement and fund some college savings (which doesn't seem to be a worry for you). One, or both of you, would be able to scale down considerably on income and still not feel a thing with a $5K/month outlay.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, are you willing to use all $750K as a down payment? If so, then a $1.5M house results in a 750K mortgage. That's about $5K/month, give or take. What are you paying for housing monthly now?

DH and I carry a $700K mortgage, and we make "only" $300K. Have 2 kids in daycare, no student loans. We are still able to contribute $35K/year to retirement and fund some college savings (which doesn't seem to be a worry for you). One, or both of you, would be able to scale down considerably on income and still not feel a thing with a $5K/month outlay.

Yes, those are some of the numbers I am working with as well. I doubt my husband wants to touch the 750K for downpayment. We would use what we have from sale of our house. Maybe $250K? Athough I think we could use at lease 250K of the 750K in addition- again different comfort levels.

[Anonymous]

Meet in the middle: $1.35 million.

[Anonymous]

Who wants to fly to France for lunch tomorrow? Ask your hubby's if it's okay.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, are you willing to use all $750K as a down payment? If so, then a $1.5M house results in a 750K mortgage. That's about $5K/month, give or take. What are you paying for housing monthly now?

DH and I carry a $700K mortgage, and we make "only" $300K. Have 2 kids in daycare, no student loans. We are still able to contribute $35K/year to retirement and fund some college savings (which doesn't seem to be a worry for you). One, or both of you, would be able to scale down considerably on income and still not feel a thing with a $5K/month outlay.

This is about us too...plenty in the $300k ranges living in million+ dollar homes. You could obvious afford a $2m+ home fairly easily on the HHI. Low levels of job security or the desire to take a scale-back in income in the near future might be your constraining factors, other risks can be managed with insurance (death, disability etc.).