I am a sloth among the cheetahs

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:SLOTH PRIDE!!!

Many people I know answer the question "What have you been doing?" with "I've been crazy busy..." (that's always the phrase: "crazy busy"). Me, I reply "not much". I receive invitations that start off with "We FINALLY found an evening when everyone is free..." I send invitations that say "let's get together, any time, we don't have anything else going on, so whenever is convenient for you". Yet, somehow, my kids play soccer and take ballet. They know most of the museums back door to front. They have playdates and parties. They are not malnourished, or brain damaged from too much TV. Both grownups have jobs. Our house isn't falling apart or ankle-deep in filth. (No, no housekeeper or other help.) It just sort of all gets done, sooner or later. And I can read a whole novel in a single day. That's why God, in Her infinite wisdom, invented Legos.

And that's an interesting point about the relationships, PPs. I have close friends (like, donate a kidney close), and acquaintances. Pretty much nothing in between. I never made the connection, but it's true, I may be too lazy to establish and maintain dozens of superficial friendships. Like everything else in my life, only the things that are REALLY important to me ever get done.

Also, I give great hugs.

I agree with everything you wrote above, especially the crazy busy part and how you word invitations. I am totally the same way! I never have anything going on and am free to get together any time. Though I do wish I had more going on. I do love my time to rest and relax and enjoy just sitting on the sofa looking out the window, doing absolutely nothing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm a sloth. Husband is a cheetah. Last Sunday, we had a go, go, go day. At the end of the day, I was exhausted and he was cranky. When I asked him why, he said he didn't feel like we accomplished anything all day.

We have a 2 year old, but I'm not sure what he is yet. I guess I'm hoping he's a cheetah so he and DH can go off and leave me home to be lazy. At what age can you tell?

I'd say by about age 3, when they start preschool, you can begin to see. My sloth took a long nap after preschool. My cheetah took a shorter nap and then went looking for an activity for the rest of the day.

[Anonymous]

It's hard to be a cheetah married to a sloth. My sloth DH feels harried and not well rested if we have any plans over a weekend. Honestly, I'd like to go out at least one night a weekend and some weekends, both nights. I am a total extrovert and need the social interaction. I also care a lot about running the household efficiently, where Dh doesn't give a hoot about trains running on time, etc. The solution is that I do and go to some things without him to give him downtime, and he doesn't complain that I don't hang all weekend with him.

I don't like to watch TV or go to movies, for instance, and there's only so much reading I can do without getting bored. Unfortunately, his energy level is decreasing with age, but mine hasn't yet.

[Anonymous]

I would say that I am somewhat in-between. I LOVE spending Saturdays just hanging around the house but also feel a great sense of accomplishment when I can check off everything on my to-do list on Sunday night. I tend to not over-schedule and when I hear friends who talk about all of the birthday parties and lessons and practices their kids have, it makes my head spin. I like to do things on the weekends but like to have the freedom to chose what I want to do--not be dictated by the set schedule of every weekend. I tend to have a few good friends who we see every so often rather than a ton of friends who I constantly have to schedule around to make a plan.

I agree with the "busy" comments though. It makes me crazy that at every work meeting we have, my boss starts off with "I know everyone is busy so let's keep this short". While I appreciate her efforts to keep meetings to a minimum, we are all there so we are obviously not that damn busy. And sometimes we need to take the extra time to talk things through and get a clear picture of what we are doing rather than cutting the meeting short for the sake of "efficiency" and everyone leaving the meeting wondering what we are supposed to do from there.

OK, rant over.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm a sloth. Husband is a cheetah. Last Sunday, we had a go, go, go day. At the end of the day, I was exhausted and he was cranky. When I asked him why, he said he didn't feel like we accomplished anything all day.

We have a 2 year old, but I'm not sure what he is yet. I guess I'm hoping he's a cheetah so he and DH can go off and leave me home to be lazy. At what age can you tell?

I'd say by about age 3, when they start preschool, you can begin to see. My sloth took a long nap after preschool. My cheetah took a shorter nap and then went looking for an activity for the rest of the day.

Cheetah here - according to my mom, I stopped napping at 3 or 4 months. Slept 8pm-5am and was always go go go all day long. I could never (and still can't!) sleep with something going on in the house. It has to be quiet/people aren't talking.

I think you can tell in the womb. My oldest is a cheetah too. He stopped napping at 2.5 (he's 4). I have to run him outside like you would a dog. Otherwise he starts running laps indoors. Kicked me so much in utero that he bruised a rib. Second kid lays around, naps AND sleeps well (and goes to bed no matter WHAT is happening), and barely moved in utero. He is 2.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm a proud sloth! I don't really view it as a negative. I love being somewhat of a homebody and bonding/spending time with my family and the people who really matter to me. I know lots of women in DC who expend all their energy on superficial relationships that don't really nourish them. These are the same ones who complain the most about their lack of passion, commitment, connection, etc. Sloths may just have it all figured out!

I haven't read through all of the posts, but you and OP are talking about two different things. We spend a lot of time at home doing family activities, but I can assure you no one is sitting around watching TV all day or napping (except the youngest). We do many of the household chores together (gardening/lawn work, washing cars, cleaning the house, running errands). OP just sounds a little lazy and unmotivated or possibly just low energy.

[Anonymous]

DH here. How do I tell my cheetah wife that I need hours of do-nothing/nap time to recharge my batteries?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DH here. How do I tell my cheetah wife that I need hours of do-nothing/nap time to recharge my batteries?

You don't! If you're an adult who takes naps on the weekends you are LAZY! Get a solid amount of sleep at night and exercise to increase your energy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DH here. How do I tell my cheetah wife that I need hours of do-nothing/nap time to recharge my batteries?

You don't! If you're an adult who takes naps on the weekends you are LAZY! Get a solid amount of sleep at night and exercise to increase your energy.

God, I am sooo glad I am not married to someone like you! I love me my naps, and they make me more productive and cheerful to be around.

It sucks when everyone in the world is not exactly like you, huh?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am a cheetah who doesn't like to schedule a lot of things because I feel like they slow us down. Does that make sense? And I do have an innate sense to gogogog...not with social arrangements, but just with always-keeping-moving. Typical saturday:
6am: kids up
6:45am: me up (out of bed), get dressed
7am: kids fed, me fed, check email, do dishes or start laundry
7:45am: tidy house & vacuum.
9:30: playground
10:40am: home. pack lunch and head to pool with kids.
11am-12:30: pool with kids (me in the water playing with them)
12:30/1: me lunch, put 2yo down for nap, check email, clean up pool bags, hang towels/suits
1-3: 2yo naps while 4yo watches TV/plays/has downtime. I exercise, shower, check email, call my mom or a friend, laundry, etc. or run errands if DH is home.
3-5: play with kids, prep dinner
5-6: dinner
6-7:30 clean up from dinner, bath and/or play with kids, do housework/bills, etc.
7:30-9: put kids to bed
9-9:30: finish housework
9:30-10:30: TV/down time with DH

Writing it out it seems like I spend a lot of time doing housework - and I do. And I think things take a long time to accomplish with kids because, well, they are 2 and 4. But DH is a sloth and it gets tough sometimes. He does play with the kids too and help out (when directed) but it's amazing how much the adults have to do to keep a household going. Since we both work (even though we work from home), stuff really piles up if you don't keep up with it. During the week, we don't plan anything, since the after work time goes sooo quickly.

One question: If you are a sloth and married to a cheetah, does your spouse give you more downtime? I let my DH have more downtime since I just plain have more energy than he does.

3 hours of housework a day, your house must be spotless!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DH here. How do I tell my cheetah wife that I need hours of do-nothing/nap time to recharge my batteries?

You don't! If you're an adult who takes naps on the weekends you are LAZY! Get a solid amount of sleep at night and exercise to increase your energy.

God, I am sooo glad I am not married to someone like you! I love me my naps, and they make me more productive and cheerful to be around.

It sucks when everyone in the world is not exactly like you, huh?

I would have to say the same thing. I couldn't be married to a grown man that needs naps

It doesn't suck for me because I would NEVER marry someone like you. It also doesn't suck because people like you aren't on my radar in any way. I don't work with people like you, have friends or family like you, and I just walk around you when you are dragging you feet trying to decide which line at the grocery store to pick.

I was also totally serious about extra sleep and exercise. You may also want to look at your diet. There is really no reason why an adult should need a nap on any kind of regular basis.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am a cheetah who doesn't like to schedule a lot of things because I feel like they slow us down. Does that make sense? And I do have an innate sense to gogogog...not with social arrangements, but just with always-keeping-moving. Typical saturday:
6am: kids up
6:45am: me up (out of bed), get dressed
7am: kids fed, me fed, check email, do dishes or start laundry
7:45am: tidy house & vacuum.
9:30: playground
10:40am: home. pack lunch and head to pool with kids.
11am-12:30: pool with kids (me in the water playing with them)
12:30/1: me lunch, put 2yo down for nap, check email, clean up pool bags, hang towels/suits
1-3: 2yo naps while 4yo watches TV/plays/has downtime. I exercise, shower, check email, call my mom or a friend, laundry, etc. or run errands if DH is home.
3-5: play with kids, prep dinner
5-6: dinner
6-7:30 clean up from dinner, bath and/or play with kids, do housework/bills, etc.
7:30-9: put kids to bed
9-9:30: finish housework
9:30-10:30: TV/down time with DH

Writing it out it seems like I spend a lot of time doing housework - and I do. And I think things take a long time to accomplish with kids because, well, they are 2 and 4. But DH is a sloth and it gets tough sometimes. He does play with the kids too and help out (when directed) but it's amazing how much the adults have to do to keep a household going. Since we both work (even though we work from home), stuff really piles up if you don't keep up with it. During the week, we don't plan anything, since the after work time goes sooo quickly.

One question: If you are a sloth and married to a cheetah, does your spouse give you more downtime? I let my DH have more downtime since I just plain have more energy than he does.

Good god, woman. I admire you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's hard to be a cheetah married to a sloth. My sloth DH feels harried and not well rested if we have any plans over a weekend. Honestly, I'd like to go out at least one night a weekend and some weekends, both nights. I am a total extrovert and need the social interaction. I also care a lot about running the household efficiently, where Dh doesn't give a hoot about trains running on time, etc. The solution is that I do and go to some things without him to give him downtime, and he doesn't complain that I don't hang all weekend with him.

I don't like to watch TV or go to movies, for instance, and there's only so much reading I can do without getting bored. Unfortunately, his energy level is decreasing with age, but mine hasn't yet.

So what do you like to do?

[Anonymous]

Sloth here -- Golf saved my marriage to my cheetah DH. When we were first married he was up way too early on the weekends. Then he figured out that he could play a round of golf with his buddies and when he returned around noon, we could have breakfast together. Now, he is up early, making breakfast and playing with the kids. It is great.

I may not look that slothy -- full time job, lots of volunteer work, and attend most of my kids many activities. However, when I daydream, it is often about when I will be able to crawl into bed and how long I can stay there.

Glad to know I am not alone. Have considered that maybe I have a chemical imbalance, or something, but truly my whole family (parents, grandparents, cousins) like to sleep. It really is my guilty pleasure. Now, off to bed!

[Anonymous]

I am a cheetah among sloths.