I am a sloth among the cheetahs

[Anonymous]

Here is the NYT link: http://opinionator.blogs.nytimes.com/2012/06/30/the-busy-trap/

[Anonymous]

I am a cheetah who doesn't like to schedule a lot of things because I feel like they slow us down. Does that make sense? And I do have an innate sense to gogogog...not with social arrangements, but just with always-keeping-moving. Typical saturday:
6am: kids up
6:45am: me up (out of bed), get dressed
7am: kids fed, me fed, check email, do dishes or start laundry
7:45am: tidy house & vacuum.
9:30: playground
10:40am: home. pack lunch and head to pool with kids.
11am-12:30: pool with kids (me in the water playing with them)
12:30/1: me lunch, put 2yo down for nap, check email, clean up pool bags, hang towels/suits
1-3: 2yo naps while 4yo watches TV/plays/has downtime. I exercise, shower, check email, call my mom or a friend, laundry, etc. or run errands if DH is home.
3-5: play with kids, prep dinner
5-6: dinner
6-7:30 clean up from dinner, bath and/or play with kids, do housework/bills, etc.
7:30-9: put kids to bed
9-9:30: finish housework
9:30-10:30: TV/down time with DH

Writing it out it seems like I spend a lot of time doing housework - and I do. And I think things take a long time to accomplish with kids because, well, they are 2 and 4. But DH is a sloth and it gets tough sometimes. He does play with the kids too and help out (when directed) but it's amazing how much the adults have to do to keep a household going. Since we both work (even though we work from home), stuff really piles up if you don't keep up with it. During the week, we don't plan anything, since the after work time goes sooo quickly.

One question: If you are a sloth and married to a cheetah, does your spouse give you more downtime? I let my DH have more downtime since I just plain have more energy than he does.

[Anonymous]

Huh. I am like the go-go-go scheduled OP, but man, do I like my down time. I am a big consumer of fiction--writing and TV shows. That's also the time I get to cuddle with my cats.

We just took a little vacation and had nice sloth time, thanks to hanging in the hotel for baby naps. I am grateful the baby slows us down a bit!

[Anonymous]

I used to be a full bred cheetah and then I married a sloth. I have modified myself so that I now can be a sloth some weekends and a cheetah the next. I used to drive my DH crazy with my need to go out and do stuff. Now we have 2 kids and my DD is like me and my DS is like my DH. My DD and I go out every weekend and do stuff while my DS and DH hang out and compete on the x-box or wii. My DH calls it "bonding time."

[Anonymous]

Just don't let your kids watch TV and play on the iPad all day, like my sloth SIL and BIL.

[Anonymous]

I don't fill every minute with things to do, so I guess I am a sloth.

I spend every evening playing with my daughter (with TV or music on in the background). There is no rushing once we get home. We eat together, she makes a huge mess and then we play until bedtime. She doesn't bathe every day, but she's always pretty happy.

On the weekend, I still sleep when the baby sleeps and she is 1. We tend to stay home on at least one of the weekend days, often both of them. I go out for a walk or take her to the park. And that's it.

I could probably socialize more, but it's an ok life.

[Anonymous]

Major sloth here...but I'm slight OCD, so my manic side lets me get my "cheetah" on, on a fairly regular basis.

Like you OP, I sometimes feel guilty about not doing more with the kids. I've used the recent hot weather as my excuse to stay in the house. I do love vacations and travel, but it usually revolves around going somewhere and being a bit lazy.

Like some of my fellow sloths on this thread, I also have no superficial friendships. I either have really close friends and casual acquaintances. I'm not interesting in forcing a relationship, just for the sake of it. Family is really important to me too. I'm not career-driven and prefer family time to climbing the career ladder.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just don't let your kids watch TV and play on the iPad all day, like my sloth SIL and BIL.

Unless you live with them, you really don't know what their kids do all day. Just sayin'.....

[Anonymous]

I'm a cheetah during the day and a sloth after about 8:00 p.m. I'm so busy running around during the day (single mom of 1, full-time job, house, daily workouts, friends) that at night I just really need to chill and I don't accomplish much.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:SLOTH PRIDE!!!

Many people I know answer the question "What have you been doing?" with "I've been crazy busy..." (that's always the phrase: "crazy busy"). Me, I reply "not much". I receive invitations that start off with "We FINALLY found an evening when everyone is free..." I send invitations that say "let's get together, any time, we don't have anything else going on, so whenever is convenient for you". Yet, somehow, my kids play soccer and take ballet. They know most of the museums back door to front. They have playdates and parties. They are not malnourished, or brain damaged from too much TV. Both grownups have jobs. Our house isn't falling apart or ankle-deep in filth. (No, no housekeeper or other help.) It just sort of all gets done, sooner or later. And I can read a whole novel in a single day. That's why God, in Her infinite wisdom, invented Legos.

And that's an interesting point about the relationships, PPs. I have close friends (like, donate a kidney close), and acquaintances. Pretty much nothing in between. I never made the connection, but it's true, I may be too lazy to establish and maintain dozens of superficial friendships. Like everything else in my life, only the things that are REALLY important to me ever get done.

Also, I give great hugs.

I think I love you, Sloth!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just don't let your kids watch TV and play on the iPad all day, like my sloth SIL and BIL.

Unless you live with them, you really don't know what their kids do all day. Just sayin'.....

Except that SIL and BIL have basically told us what their kids do all day. They look at their kids on our couch with their devices and joke about how it's a continual thing, ha ha, they should really get their kids to do something else, ha ha, and what's a parent to do, ha ha.

No, we don't criticize or compare with our own kids, if for no other reason than it would have the opposite effect. But BIL and SIL don't exactly model initiative, let alone cheetahood.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
I love to rest. A pleasant weekend for me is catching up on sleep and laundry, maybe having a nice family meal outside and NOT having to go to any birthday parties or events. I start the week refreshed. When I go on vacation I like to have lots od mellow down time. I think my energy level must be a fraction of that of most people in the DC area. I am a sloth among the cheetahs. Any other sloths out there?

My DH is a sloth. I am a cheetah. We have a child who's a sloth and one who's a cheetah. It works out well because DH and sloth child hang a lot, and cheetah child and I are on the go enough to make us happy. It's innate, part of your natural personality.

I'm guessing you're an introvert too. I don't get any socializing in during the week, so if I had your type of weekend, I'd have no friends at all.

[Anonymous]

Cheetah here - married to sloth - with Sloth DC. It actually is an issue in our marriage bc I always feel like sloth is "slacking off" and I am doing everything, and sloth gets defensive. (I know sloth has a different perspective of that but I'm the cheetah and the one responding to this thread.)

Other point I'll add is that I am a cheetah and an introvert! I do not like being around people much, but I do always feel the need to be go go go and "accomplishing" something (laundry, errands, etc.).

I am fascinated when I see people napping on hammocks. I just don't get it!

Love this thread, Op - go be a sloth with pride! You will probably live longer than we cheetahs

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm a proud sloth! I don't really view it as a negative. I love being somewhat of a homebody and bonding/spending time with my family and the people who really matter to me. I know lots of women in DC who expend all their energy on superficial relationships that don't really nourish them. These are the same ones who complain the most about their lack of passion, commitment, connection, etc. Sloths may just have it all figured out!

+1000
At the end of the day, there is little (outside of work) that I truly must do outside and can't do with my family in our home.

[Anonymous]

I have no problem with either cheetahs or sloths. But do not tell me how "busy" you are when it is so clear you are lazy as hell.