Please shed some light on the-unspoken-issue at sidwell with African American Boys

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Please speak up for perspective Sidwell AA students. DS accepted for 4th but truly concerned about his emotional well being. Our 2nd option is STA but he's not feeling it.

Send him to STA.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No. It's not an issue because not a single poster can point to a single specific or even general problem. But you know, knock yourself out. Next item will be....(1) NRWBSPID..

Obviously parents are not going to post on this site if they have had a troubling or heart breaking issue. There are not that many AA teenage boys at Sidwell ands a detailed post would out the family. I can tell you what: I have heard the same comments from parents who had AA children at Sidwell 15 years ago, 10 years ago and right now. All basically said the same thing: AA teenage boys get disciplined beyond what their parents thought was fair and there is tension over dating across racial lines.

Why is it always ....i have heard the same same from ``parents.'' Unless you are a parent at the school, that's just a rumor. The idea that dating across racial lines is a problem seems absurd on its face. Sounds like someone from an older generation is trying to create racial tension where there is none.

[Anonymous]

I'm the parent of 2 Sidwell grads and a current student -- all white males. All have dated girls who are African-American (as well as Asian-American). Similarly, my sons have male friends who are AA and who have dated white girls. I've nevery heard of any tension over this issue. Maybe it exists, but I've not heard about it over the past nearly 10 years that we've had kids in the high school.

For parents of African-American boys who have concerns, I'd really urge you to speak to current parents and teachers. The admissions office should be able to put you in touch with these folks. Even if you have a young child, you can ask to speak to parents of upper school students and to administrators and teachers in the US. In particular, you might ask to speak with Michael Woods, the US Dean of Students, and with Hayes Davis, who teaches in the English department and has been the advisor to the BSU.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No. It's not an issue because not a single poster can point to a single specific or even general problem. But you know, knock yourself out. Next item will be....(1) NRWBSPID..

Obviously parents are not going to post on this site if they have had a troubling or heart breaking issue. There are not that many AA teenage boys at Sidwell ands a detailed post would out the family. I can tell you what: I have heard the same comments from parents who had AA children at Sidwell 15 years ago, 10 years ago and right now. All basically said the same thing: AA teenage boys get disciplined beyond what their parents thought was fair and there is tension over dating across racial lines.

Why is it always ....i have heard the same same from ``parents.'' Unless you are a parent at the school, that's just a rumor. The idea that dating across racial lines is a problem seems absurd on its face. Sounds like someone from an older generation is trying to create racial tension where there is none.

This is so naive. Read the threads about interracial dating. Lots of people have issues with it, so it's not so absurd that this could be an issue at Sidwell. Agree that AA parents can take it up with the administration and there is no need to hash it out on an anonymous forum.

[Anonymous]

Well at Sidwell the idea of interracial dating raising tensions is absurd. This is a wet noodle attempt to provoke. You clearly have no clue about the school or its community.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No. It's not an issue because not a single poster can point to a single specific or even general problem. But you know, knock yourself out. Next item will be....(1) NRWBSPID..

Obviously parents are not going to post on this site if they have had a troubling or heart breaking issue. There are not that many AA teenage boys at Sidwell ands a detailed post would out the family. I can tell you what: I have heard the same comments from parents who had AA children at Sidwell 15 years ago, 10 years ago and right now. All basically said the same thing: AA teenage boys get disciplined beyond what their parents thought was fair and there is tension over dating across racial lines.

Why is it always ....i have heard the same same from ``parents.'' Unless you are a parent at the school, that's just a rumor. The idea that dating across racial lines is a problem seems absurd on its face. Sounds like someone from an older generation is trying to create racial tension where there is none.

Women are waiting until their 40s to have their first child. By the time DC turns 16, their parents are considered senior citizens. These parents ARE from an old generation.

[Anonymous]

And the discipline issue ???

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No. It's not an issue because not a single poster can point to a single specific or even general problem. But you know, knock yourself out. Next item will be....(1) NRWBSPID..

Obviously parents are not going to post on this site if they have had a troubling or heart breaking issue. There are not that many AA teenage boys at Sidwell ands a detailed post would out the family. I can tell you what: I have heard the same comments from parents who had AA children at Sidwell 15 years ago, 10 years ago and right now. All basically said the same thing: AA teenage boys get disciplined beyond what their parents thought was fair and there is tension over dating across racial lines.

Why is it always ....i have heard the same same from ``parents.'' Unless you are a parent at the school, that's just a rumor. The idea that dating across racial lines is a problem seems absurd on its face. Sounds like someone from an older generation is trying to create racial tension where there is none.

Women are waiting until their 40s to have their first child. By the time DC turns 16, their parents are considered senior citizens. These parents ARE from an old generation.

I'd say more like mid-late 30's to have a baby ( not 40's). So, if you are an 18 year old a Sidwell, there is good chance that your mom is between 53 and 58 years old ( born in 1959- 1964 era)

[Anonymous]

I am a teacher at an independent school in this area--not Sidwell. It is an increasingly frequent phenomenon that parents of all races/ethnicities complain about disciplinary actions; I would guess it is a combination of the growth of helicopter parenting and, at the high school level, worry about college admission ramifications. When those complaints are from African-American parents, they not infrequently argue at the outset that race must have been a factor in the decision. Generally after a dialogue they are satisfied that the process is not racially driven.

I would suspect the dynamic may be similar at Sidwell.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No. It's not an issue because not a single poster can point to a single specific or even general problem. But you know, knock yourself out. Next item will be....(1) NRWBSPID..

Obviously parents are not going to post on this site if they have had a troubling or heart breaking issue. There are not that many AA teenage boys at Sidwell ands a detailed post would out the family. I can tell you what: I have heard the same comments from parents who had AA children at Sidwell 15 years ago, 10 years ago and right now. All basically said the same thing: AA teenage boys get disciplined beyond what their parents thought was fair and there is tension over dating across racial lines.

Why is it always ....i have heard the same same from ``parents.'' Unless you are a parent at the school, that's just a rumor. The idea that dating across racial lines is a problem seems absurd on its face. Sounds like someone from an older generation is trying to create racial tension where there is none.

Sorry, the dating issue happened to my neice who is interracial herself and a boy said point blank that he could not date her because she was black. This happened last year at a private school and it was not Sidwell. The idea that Sidwell would be immune from this is insane, no school is immune.

OP, I'm not sure if you can do this at Sidwell or not but try to approach a random parent from the school and ask them. I have done this before and I was amazed at the candidate feedback that I have received. I have even talked with people the school has selected as escorts during admission events. When I spoke to them one on one and got them comfortable to talk about race they did not say anything bad necessarily but I definitely got a feeling for the racial relations. How their child fit in and things that they wished would change.

[Anonymous]

Talking to actual parents at the school -- rather than buying into the BS posted on DCUM -- is what several Sidwell parents on this thread have suggested.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am a teacher at an independent school in this area--not Sidwell. It is an increasingly frequent phenomenon that parents of all races/ethnicities complain about disciplinary actions; I would guess it is a combination of the growth of helicopter parenting and, at the high school level, worry about college admission ramifications. When those complaints are from African-American parents, they not infrequently argue at the outset that race must have been a factor in the decision. Generally after a dialogue they are satisfied that the process is not racially driven.

I would suspect the dynamic may be similar at Sidwell.

I hope you're not one of the few remaining dinosaur's at STA spouting this bs.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No. It's not an issue because not a single poster can point to a single specific or even general problem. But you know, knock yourself out. Next item will be....(1) NRWBSPID..

Obviously parents are not going to post on this site if they have had a troubling or heart breaking issue. There are not that many AA teenage boys at Sidwell ands a detailed post would out the family. I can tell you what: I have heard the same comments from parents who had AA children at Sidwell 15 years ago, 10 years ago and right now. All basically said the same thing: AA teenage boys get disciplined beyond what their parents thought was fair and there is tension over dating across racial lines.

Why is it always ....i have heard the same same from ``parents.'' Unless you are a parent at the school, that's just a rumor. The idea that dating across racial lines is a problem seems absurd on its face. Sounds like someone from an older generation is trying to create racial tension where there is none.

Sorry, the dating issue happened to my neice who is interracial herself and a boy said point blank that he could not date her because she was black. This happened last year at a private school and it was not Sidwell. The idea that Sidwell would be immune from this is insane, no school is immune.

OP, I'm not sure if you can do this at Sidwell or not but try to approach a random parent from the school and ask them. I have done this before and I was amazed at the candidate feedback that I have received. I have even talked with people the school has selected as escorts during admission events. When I spoke to them one on one and got them comfortable to talk about race they did not say anything bad necessarily but I definitely got a feeling for the racial relations. How their child fit in and things that they wished would change.

Great advice, PP. Not OP. I did a few one-on-one chats at both Sidwell and St Albans with students before making our final decision. The admission offices at both schools did put me in touch with parents, but the students' input gave me a better sense of how or if my DS would fit at each school.

[Anonymous]

Which one did you choose?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sidwell holds all of their student to a very high standard, Intellectually and personally. They do their best not to make exceptions for anyone. It is part of the quaker thing of not singling anyone out for praise. This can be a tough on the confidence.
.

Not true for the Obama daughters