Any women out there who did *not* do a whole bunch of crazy stuff in undergrad?

Anonymous
OP, the girls who do not do crazy stuff don't get much attention.
I never used drugs, never drank, did not sleep around.
Anonymous
I am the opposite, I did a whole bunch of stuff I regret in college.

i drank a little bit in high school but not much. had 1 boyfriend my senior year and into freshman year (1st year).

I went to UVA and would pretty much say I was a functioning alcoholic by senior year. Drove drunk a few times. I blacked out once and wound up in the hospital too.
I went from not believing in sex before marriage to sleeping with the guy I loved and thought i'd marry (right at the end of high school) to sleeping with someone I loved, to sleeping with someone I liked, to sleeping with someone I thought was hot when I was completely bombed, over and over again.

I blame both the social culture at UVA as well as myself, but the atmosphere there in my experience (and at so many other colleges but I only have this one that I know first-hand) was no official dating, just hooking up, fraternity parties, and drinking in apartments. I also worked in a bar on the corner. Very little else social that I remember (a few concerts). Football games were about sneaking in bourbon or getting plastered beforehand and then wobbling through the game. Foxfield was about tailgating and again, drinking, not really about horse races.

It took me until just after college to realize - 1) I can't hook up with randoms anymore 2) I can't use alcohol as my only way to relax 3) most people in the real world DATE, and don't just hook up. I actually almost had my (now husband) almost break up with me because the only way I would be honest with him was when I was bombed drunk when there were things I didn't like about our relationship. I just didn't know how to be an adult.

I sometimes wonder how much the college atmosphere that I experienced contributed to my abusive behavior. I really do feel like I'm lucky to be alive sometimes, and I don't want that to happen to my kids.
Anonymous
I also can relate, OP. I was in the supposed minority, and did not drink, do any crazy things, etc.
Anonymous
15:14, thanks for sharing your story. It's great that you're able to look back and recognize that you made some not-so-great choices.
I went to a school that was close to UMass Amherst - a huge party school - and once my friends and I went on campus to a frat party. I'll never forget being in the grimy, dark basement of a frat house - music blaring, people everywhere...in one corner, a guy funneling beer into his stomach; in the middle of the floor, two girls making out and fondling each other to the whoops and encouraging chants of a circle of guys standing around them. I'll never forget it. I never went to another frat party. My DH is adamant that our DDs either go to a college within commuting distance (so that they can live at home), or go to women's schools. I think I might be in agreement with him.
Anonymous
I can relate OP. I was too busy working full time to support myself to do anything crazy or overly stupid.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Yep, not everyone does "crazy" stuff. I'm 26 and am still a virgin. I'm looking forward to giving that aspect of me to my future husband.
I don't have a problem with people drinking in moderation, but it doesn't appeal to me at all so I don't choose to partake.


clapclapclap congratulations! guess you're not a whore like the rest of us who didn't save ourselves for marriage.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:15:14, thanks for sharing your story. It's great that you're able to look back and recognize that you made some not-so-great choices.
I went to a school that was close to UMass Amherst - a huge party school - and once my friends and I went on campus to a frat party. I'll never forget being in the grimy, dark basement of a frat house - music blaring, people everywhere...in one corner, a guy funneling beer into his stomach; in the middle of the floor, two girls making out and fondling each other to the whoops and encouraging chants of a circle of guys standing around them. I'll never forget it. I never went to another frat party. My DH is adamant that our DDs either go to a college within commuting distance (so that they can live at home), or go to women's schools. I think I might be in agreement with him.


Well, women's schools are breeding grounds for lesbianism. Not that there's anything wrong with it--I'd rather my daughters go lesbo than get gang-raped at a frat house.
Anonymous
Wow, I can't believe how screwed up everyone on this thread is.

Glad I had fun in college. I would rather my daughter enjoy a few orgies than end up a 26-year old virgin!
Anonymous
I also went to UVA, but had a different experience from 15:14. While I certainly knew people who "enjoyed" college life like the PP, my friends and I (both male and female) had experiences more like what the PP described. While I did have sex while I was in college, it was with my boyfriend who is now my husband of 12 years. I never drank until I was 21.

I was pretty shocked and disappointed when I first arrived at college, so I do think you should better prepare you children for what to expect (my parents didn't tell me that kids drank and had random sex, but I honestly believe they had no idea).
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Yep, not everyone does "crazy" stuff. I'm 26 and am still a virgin. I'm looking forward to giving that aspect of me to my future husband.
I don't have a problem with people drinking in moderation, but it doesn't appeal to me at all so I don't choose to partake.


clapclapclap congratulations! guess you're not a whore like the rest of us who didn't save ourselves for marriage.


Oh please. That is not what she said.
Anonymous
So do any of you who did not do anything crazy in college regret not being crazy while you could? I was crazy by the standards on this board, but pretty tame compared to the "What crazy things did you do in college" board. I drank too much on a regular basis, did a lot of "hooking up" (but only had sex with two guys, both of whom I was in a relationship with), and smoked pot a few times. Yet if I have any regrets, it's not that I did these things, but that I didn't do even more crazier things back when I had the chance. God knows I'm not going to sleep around or try cocaine at this point in my life.
Anonymous
This is an admirable thread and I am proud of you gals looking back on my own experience. In retrospect though I am glad I did not go to school with any of you (or at least we never crossed paths). The world needs more good girls!
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I can honestly say that I did not do anything crazy in college. No sex, no drugs, almost no drinking and never getting actually drunk. Went to an Ivy and there must have been plenty of crazy stuff going on, but I had my friends and we had a good time doing whatever it was we were doing. It isn't like we were studying all the time, we just weren't very wild.


I'm the OP. This (and lots of other people's comments) sounds just like me. I hope for something similar for my daughters. I want them to have fun, and I don't mind if they drink in moderation, but I am hoping that they won't engage in anything risky or dangerous.


This is me too. And I also have 2 girls.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I drank a beer here and there, studied hard, graduated summa cum laude. I didn't have sex until I was good and ready, at 21.


This is me, but it was age 22 for sexy times. My friends and I were a little dorky and we had plenty of fun without ever doing drugs or going crazy.

My plan for DD is to make sure she's a dork!
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:So do any of you who did not do anything crazy in college regret not being crazy while you could? I was crazy by the standards on this board, but pretty tame compared to the "What crazy things did you do in college" board. I drank too much on a regular basis, did a lot of "hooking up" (but only had sex with two guys, both of whom I was in a relationship with), and smoked pot a few times. Yet if I have any regrets, it's not that I did these things, but that I didn't do even more crazier things back when I had the chance. God knows I'm not going to sleep around or try cocaine at this point in my life.


Hi there, I'm the OP. To answer your question, I don't feel a sense of regret or wish I had done crazier things. I don't feel like I missed out. I guess I also feel a little bit proud of myself that I had pretty good judgment back then, despite being an immature college kid
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