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15:33 again.
What I've been doing (and I hope it works, my little guy is only 2.5) is asking DC lots of questions. If he asks me 'why/what's that?' I'll ask him, 'well, what do YOU think?' and then encourage any connections he makes on his own "yep, that does look like a fire truck because of the lights and sirens, but I think it's an ambulance, see how it's a different color?". If I see something I think he'd be interested in, I point it out and we talk about it. Even if that means we spend 15min on one street corner watching trash trucks on our walk home. I also try really hard to take all his questions seriously and answer them as completely as possible. When we build stuff or draw or create anything, I ask him to explain to me what he's doing or show me how to make one too. Trying gets lots of specific praise "Great job writing your name in kid writing! I like it when you try, even if it doesn't work or you're not happy with it. Would you like to try a different way?" We tell LOTS of stories and sing LOTS of songs, often made up on the spot and totally ridiculous with the chain of events/cause and effect. We pretend and role play, DC is very rarely himself and is constantly asking me to 'be' XYZ and talk to him in character. When he gets frustrated, I ask him to stop, take a deep breath and ask for help nicely. He has to be specific with what he needs help with ("help picking up my fork please" not just screaming "help!") We talk about how it's okay to be cranky and frustrated, but it's not okay to be mean or take it out on whatever objects are nearby. If he needs a break before trying again, tell me and then take one. We go back to the task when he's calm. If kids feel like their thoughts and feelings are taken seriously, they'll be more confident to try new things, new methods and to admit when they can't do something. I'm big on specific praise, being clear on what any problems are and soliciting his help in solving them. And yes, it seems totally ridiculous that I do that with a toddler, but I promise, it's not overwhelming or vomit-inducing. Just rephrasing things I'd say/do anyway and actually listening and paying attention to him to figure out what he needs rather than what I want to teach. He's also very well behaved for a 2.5yo, as he's learned that if I say something (good or bad), I mean it and follow through. As he gets older, I plan on having conversations about how people are different and that things you're born with aren't things to be proud of or ashamed of, just things to accept. Intelligence is like being tall, you didn't do anything to get that way. The important thing is how you deal with what you've been given, not bragging or missing what you really had nothing to do with. |