Forum Index
»
Kids With Special Needs and Disabilities
Onset of autism symptoms?
![[Post New]](/jforum/templates/default/images/icon_minipost_new.gif){kind=icon}
Anonymous
|
OP, sorry you got grilled. I too wonder this and would appreciate people who have really anecdotal advice to give. My DS has cousins on the spectrum and I have a great friend with 3 autistic children. It is evident that it is largely genetic.
I worry most about regressions. I constantly check my son's behavior because I do know all the signs. Lately we have been having a lot of tantrums and we are ever so slightly delayed with speech (no real words just babble @ 15 months). If something doesn't give in the next few months, I will have him evaluated because of his genetic history. I go back in forth in my mind, everything is fine one day and then the next day I worry that he cries when he touches grass or sand. The pedi said everything is fine and that does little to assuage my fears. Actually, it probably makes them worse because the opinion of a regular pedi is so beleaguered when it comes to ASD on this board. |
Anonymous
It is exactly posts like this that don't belong here. Please go to General Parenting. Please have a shred of consideration for Special Needs Parents. We really, really, really, don't want to hear about your constant obsession and your fear that your children will turn out to have special needs. How can I possibly make you understand how hurtful, rude, excluding, damaging, and prejudiced that is? Please, please, please.....stop it. Stop posting things like this here. This is OUR board. |
Anonymous
| Sigh, I continue to be frustrated by the offense people are taking. There is a very clear genetic component, and PP's concerns for her child are understandable. |
Anonymous
See, I'm the PP who has had cancer and has a child with an ASD and this is exactly what I mean by over the top. Yes, its annoying when people post "please reassure me that my child isn't like ours" but this kind of reaction is really an overreaction. This isn't OUR board, it is a public board. People post all the time with their children's symptoms and signs and thats very different from OP's "tell me when I can breath a sigh of relief" post. Really, if it bothers you, ignore. Frankly, if I had a 15 month old child who wasn't talking and a strong family history I would be concerned as well. I think PP might want to get on a developmental peds radar screen now. |
Anonymous
I hate to say it but you are the one in denial here. There is a lot of evidence, that genetics matter it does not always cause, yes their may be environmental factor but you cannot ignore that it is there. It does not make a person bad or terrible it just is, so we deal. I have to disagree with your characterization of the kids in special ed. My mother was one of them, they just did not want to think about what was happening to these kids so they stigmatized them as the kids with bad table manners. |
Anonymous
Even if there is a environmental factors, they are influenced by genetics--that is why some people get sick and others do, e.g. cancer, allergies, etc. Some people are "susceptible" for genetic reasons. Many people are exposed to the same environmental toxins, not everyone gets sick. Also, genes mutate because of the environment. |
Anonymous
should have typed "others do not" |
Anonymous
You are suggesting that this is just a public board and that this is no "us" here. But the reason that "normal parents" want to be able to post here is that there is a feeling of community and continuity and niceness among the Special Needs parents who post here continually. The "normal parents" want to be able to get in on that and ask questions about their children. You are creating a paradox -- suggesting that it's fine for Normal Parents to post because there really is no community here -- it's just a public board. But why would normal parents want to post here in the first place if that's true? It's fine with me if normal parents want to ask questions about their questions about children's development. As in "Do you think it's normal that my 15 month old is still only babbling?" End of question. But tacking on two additional sentences about how "I'm so afraid he may have special needs/autism/delays" and "I watch him constantly for signs of this/that/the other thing" because his second cousin has hypotonia. "I'm terrified she may have special needs." This offends enough people that it should just not be said. |
Anonymous
|
NP here. You can bet that when #2 came along, I was watching like a hawk for signs, and, yes, hoping for reassurance that #2 did not have the same neuro issues as #1. It does not mean that I do not love #1 with all my heart and soul, but I am aware of the genetic component in our family and even our decision to have another child was not easy. Could we be good parents to two s/n children? Would we be compromising either of them if that came to pass?. I love both my kids tremendously and want them to be as happy and healthy and functional as possible. And yes i really pray that #2 is neurotypical and has an easier time of it than #1. I can understand why OP asked the question she did, though I agree it was probably not a great place to do so.
OP--the best thing is to educate yourself on what to look for and when--not that you should be in a state of constant anxiety (or blithely assume you are 'out of the woods') but because early intervention is key. And because it might help you be a good aunt. But don't look for that information here. It's very hard for parents of children with autism or other neuro or development issues to be put in the position of trying to reassure nervous parents of seemingly neurotypical kids. |
Anonymous
another NP here, one with a child with probable Aspergers. I am going to gently agree with the 1st PP above and say that, yes, I do think that illnesses fall pretty neatly into two categories: Category One is for those that nobody normal would take offense at if a coworker asked somewhat probing questions (when did you know? what were the early symptoms?) Those that have these diseases, like myself, talk about them pretty easily and willingly, EVEN IF THEY ARE CHRONIC. These include: asthma, Lyme disease, eczema, and so on. Come on, be honest. Who here would be super sensitive and offended if someone at work asked you when you first knew your baby probably had milk and wheat allergies, what are the signs to look for, etc? Right, no one would be offended. You might be irritated because you were busy, but few of us would tell the questioner to 'piss off' and 'God, ask your doctor, would you?' and 'Stop using my own baby as your measuring stick.' We'd just answer the question. Category Two, for better or worse, includes things like ASD, manic depression, schizophrenia, cancer, Tay Sachs and more. Bottom line? The stakes are a lot higher with Category Two. So err on the side of sensitivity. |
Anonymous
| Some illnesses are stigmatized. Some are not. It's just a fact of life. |
Anonymous
I am sorry, that I am yet another poster who has ticked you off PP. You have to understand that some of us WHO DON'T KNOW where our child falls on the spectrum yet, do in fact worry based upon REAL reasons like very heightened genetic predispositions. My DS has cousins on both sides with autism. I'm sorry if I made you feel bad, but you didn't have to return the favor. |
Anonymous
| 13:23 here is my problem with your post. A lot of people post questions about special needs issues on the main board especially educational boards. Sometimes folks suggest more knowledge on the Special Needs Discussion, but they are never flamed out because someone "not normal" posted on their discussion. This is an appropriate question and the those taking offense are acting very dog in the manger. |
Anonymous
|
I've posted on this thread a few times but wanted to add a few things: 1) when it became clear a few months ago that my son might be on the spectrum, the first thing I did was to go sit down with a friend whose son has a variety of special needs; 2) the OP has done that in terms of talking to her brother, but is just seeking additional info from folks who would have reason to know; 3) having not posted here before ( I believe) she has no idea what the mores and folkways are here, but instead of trying to be helpful, or God forbid, gentle, there was an undue amount of bashing that went on ... which, I must point out, runs directly contrary to what several folks have described (and what I have historically seen) as the "personality" or "community" of those who post here.
Finding ways to be gentle with others can also help us to be more gentle with ourselves as well ... just saying. |
Anonymous
So well said, PP. |