Weird living situation of dating partner

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My dating partner lives like 1+ hrs away from Northern Virginia and has her own apartment. She is legally separated from her ex but also goes to his house during the weekday to take care of dogs. He works out of town and only comes during the weekends when she goes to her apartment. This arrangement seems weird to me and Exs shouldn't be going to each other's house in or behind their presence. I asked her and she responded with a reason to take care of dogs. She is 44 and have two adult daughters in college.

I feel like you would never move on if you are in each other's lives this much.

Is this house her former house and were the dogs their family dogs during their marriage? It doesn’t seem that weird that she wants to ensure the dogs are well taken care of while her ex is out of town since they’re her pets too. If she isn’t divorced yet is it still half her house?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This wouldn’t bother me. If she wanted to be with her ex, she would be. I’m sure she considers the dogs hers and feels like they have joint custody.

She might be. How do you know he's really out of town? You might be the side piece in her still-active marriage.

[Anonymous]

I am on the side that it is not right and appropriate for OP's ex to visit her previous home. If she is serious about OP then she would never do it. In a serious relationship with one man and going back to ex's house for whatever reason is just gross. who else what else is going on there? Op needs to dump her ass.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am on the side that it is not right and appropriate for OP's ex to visit her previous home. If she is serious about OP then she would never do it. In a serious relationship with one man and going back to ex's house for whatever reason is just gross. who else what else is going on there? Op needs to dump her ass.

The ex isn’t there when they go over and it’s for something they have shared responsibility for. If the ex was there or it was something she really doesn’t have responsibility for now that they are separated- that would be a different situation. There are way more sus and complicated situation than this out there. The OP just needs to ask about it and figure out if they are okay with it or move on.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op here. They are not divorced yet but legally separated and she can have dogs at her apartment too.

So you are committing adultery with a married woman?