How to make friends who aren’t into drinking?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You still attend the drinking events

You stand and sip. Sip whatever, non alcoholic if you want. No one cares.

Be social

+1 My kid is very social and still doesn’t drink. He’s usually designated driver for college friends in the summer.

[Anonymous]

Does the school have non-drinking events? UMD has Terps at Night, which offers all non-drinking events.

Other schools have "At Night" events with the name usually preceded by their school mascot. "Vikings at Night," "Bulldogs at Night" and so on.

Your kid can see if their school has that.

Second, are there dorms that are alcohol and drug free? At UMD, this can be requested.

Thirdly, what clubs exist where people take a vow not to drink? There might be some, and finding them might require asking other non-drinkers or whoever is in charge of clubs and school life.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

all the social events for incoming freshmen have revolved around drinking.

For? You mean put on by the college?

No by other students, upperclassmen, etc.

Just because people are drinking, it doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy it. DD’s college has a really amazing outdoors club and students traditionally bring wine out camping- but you don’t have to indulge. If it’s a party, obviously it’ll be a bit more fun drunk, but everyday social events? Who cares.

As someone who's never been a drinker: 1. Being sober around drunk people is NOT at all fun. 2. People in their first and second years of college drink like alcohol is about to be discontinued. Nobody is sipping one beer throughout the night - they are tossing back as many as they can. Thus, people in college drinking, are getting drunk.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

all the social events for incoming freshmen have revolved around drinking.

For? You mean put on by the college?

No by other students, upperclassmen, etc.

Just because people are drinking, it doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy it. DD’s college has a really amazing outdoors club and students traditionally bring wine out camping- but you don’t have to indulge. If it’s a party, obviously it’ll be a bit more fun drunk, but everyday social events? Who cares.

As someone who's never been a drinker: 1. Being sober around drunk people is NOT at all fun. 2. People in their first and second years of college drink like alcohol is about to be discontinued. Nobody is sipping one beer throughout the night - they are tossing back as many as they can. Thus, people in college drinking, are getting drunk.

As someone who has never been a drinker, the trick is to leave before things get sloppy. The first 1-2 hours of an event are usually fine. You just pay attention to those around you and make a friendly exit when it's no longer fun.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Does the school have non-drinking events? UMD has Terps at Night, which offers all non-drinking events.

Other schools have "At Night" events with the name usually preceded by their school mascot. "Vikings at Night," "Bulldogs at Night" and so on.

Your kid can see if their school has that.

Second, are there dorms that are alcohol and drug free? At UMD, this can be requested.

Thirdly, what clubs exist where people take a vow not to drink? There might be some, and finding them might require asking other non-drinkers or whoever is in charge of clubs and school life.

OF COURSE THEY DO.

Did you just arrive from Mars? All colleges put on events and they aren't going to provide alcohol to minors for liability reasons. This thread is just about a kid who has decided there's nothing to do when there are tons of things happening during the opening weeks at any college.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If your college kid has to ask his mommy how to make friends with kids who don't drink he has bigger problems.

Not everyone has a perfect outgoing [drinking] kid like yours! Pat yourself on the back.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If your college kid has to ask his mommy how to make friends with kids who don't drink he has bigger problems.

He didn't ask. He told me about the situation he's experiencing. I was hoping for some good suggestions I might pass along if he brings it up again.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My kid is at an Ivy and none of his friends drink. They play a club sport. They go to the gym, do a lot of pick up basketball, etc. Play poker, get together, etc.

This is what my kid does.

[Anonymous]

Clubs, outdoor activities, d&d and gaming groups.

Stay away from Greek life.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Baptist Student Union?

Oh so different than mormons

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If your college kid has to ask his mommy how to make friends with kids who don't drink he has bigger problems.

He didn't ask. He told me about the situation he's experiencing. I was hoping for some good suggestions I might pass along if he brings it up again.

Good advice to try going for the first hour, before people get drunk. Especially good if he has a friend with him who also doesn’t drink. They can go together, hang out with people for a bit, and then move on to somewhere else.

They may meet other non-drinkers this way, and those kids may move on to the next thing with them, growing their group.

This is how my friend met her husband of 30+ years. They were two non-drinkers at a fraternity/sorority mixer!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Singing club? You can't sing when you are drunk. Same for dancing club.

Anything related to healthy lifestyles, hiking, rockclimbing.

You think people who go hiking don’t get drunk? I’d ask you to meet most New England lacs.

This. I was talking to a friend and they all get high before hiking.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My DS has noted that all the social events for incoming freshmen have revolved around drinking. He’s not really into that (yet). He’s wondering how to meet other guys who aren’t into it.

Don’t say “the Mormons” because we’re not Mormons. 😃

Only need to make Mormon friends. You don’t have to be Mormon

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Board Games. We would stay up until 2 AM playing Catan and Risk.

My kid and his friends workout, club sport, pick up basketball and lots of late night poker games.

He did not have any big Greek or big football drinking schools on his list.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Get into weed.

Big link to schizophrenia now in kids that do it a lot before age 20. Weed today is different than weed pre-2000.0