How to respond to this from MIL?

[Anonymous]

Channel Dana Carvey as the Church Lady.

“Well, isn’t THAT special?”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She has feelings of inadequacy and is trying to make herself feel better by putting others down. Very common.

My mom does this too. I agree with this poster.

[Anonymous]

My mil is just as bad. I want to punch her in the face half the time, and the other half I just want to turn and walk away as fast as I can. Today I proudly mentioned DS's sports accomplishment, and she said, "Isn't there anything he could do that wouldn't expose him to the low culture in that sport? Like maybe music, or art?" Apparently DS's sport is not bougie enough.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My MIL consistently and persistently says things such as the following:

Noticing the kids have a pimple: “I never had a pimple in my life.” Beauty definitely fades.

When babies fuss: “My boys never fussed. They were perfect.” As children. DH is really fussy and naggy now.

About herself: “I’ve always had an incredibly flat stomach.” What happened?

Daughter is moody: “I’m always in a good mood. My sons were never moody.” Yeah you have a lot of testosterone.

When people have freckles or any kind of blemish: “I’ve never had such a thing. They’re just awful.” Somehow you got wrinkles anyway though.

“My guys never had sugar. I made everything from scratch.” My mom still does.

I cannot. I cannot stand her. I have to just mmmmmm, don’t I. There’s nothing else to be said. It’s just so. Hard.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My MIL consistently and persistently says things such as the following:

Noticing the kids have a pimple: “I never had a pimple in my life.” Beauty definitely fades.

When babies fuss: “My boys never fussed. They were perfect.” As children. DH is really fussy and naggy now.

About herself: “I’ve always had an incredibly flat stomach.” What happened?

Daughter is moody: “I’m always in a good mood. My sons were never moody.” Yeah you have a lot of testosterone.

When people have freckles or any kind of blemish: “I’ve never had such a thing. They’re just awful.” Somehow you got wrinkles anyway though.

“My guys never had sugar. I made everything from scratch.” My mom still does.

I cannot. I cannot stand her. I have to just mmmmmm, don’t I. There’s nothing else to be said. It’s just so. Hard.

Bolded replies for you. Say it with a smile.

[Anonymous]

“Good to know.”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You don’t really think that other than a direct confrontation that anything you say will change her behavior, right?

Oh absolutely not. And I’d never confront her on it, what would I say? Her husband and kids just ignore so I must ignore. It’s just maddening and inane. And I don’t know if she actually does feel inadequate, I think she feels incredibly superior.
I think we often excuse this with the former. That’s not her issue.

I think I’d take a different approach. Any time she’d say something outlandish, I’d laugh out loud, give her a little hug and a pat and walk away. Every single time.

[Anonymous]

dont say anything just stare at her directly.

[Anonymous]

While I am sure that they are very annoying and frustrating for you, they are pretty funny.

My grandmother (Dad's Mom), was kinda like that - I think my Mom said something like she thinks that she's never farted in her life!

She would tell me all the time when I was younger and drinking coffee (I was in HS) that "Your Uncle Roger never drank coffee until he was in the army and it's going to stunt your growth."

IDK, ignore, nod along, Church Lady response all sound good to me.

[Anonymous]

I would say “ I have a hard time believing you never had a pimple, Gladys.” or, I have a hard time believing your kids were never moody, Gladys.”

[Anonymous]

yes have fun with it. Not meanly but, I guess frankly. Like when my aunts liked to comment on how much weight I gained during pregnancy, I wasn't afraid to comment on all their new wrinkles, or say, well I'm eating for two, what's your excuse?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is my mother to an extent. “I used to wake up at 5 am every day and make all the food from scratch.” Every time she makes one of these pronouncements my DH started replying with “would you like a medal for that?” Yes, rude, I know, but it’s the only thing that shuts it down.

I like it! Good for your dh!

[Anonymous]

My own mother is exactly like that. She's lucky I'm her daughter and not her DIL or she'd probably never see her grandkids...
I think it is indeed inadequacy. She never worked and really wasn't much of a homemaker either. I have an intellectually demanding job though I only work 3 days a week and I am a pretty great homemaker if I am being honest.
I made a beautiful spread from scratch for Thanksgiving and she scoffed "Why bother with all that work. I used (insert convenience item here) and it was just as delicious. Everyone raved about it." OK mom, you're welcome for the food.
Or "What are you doing this morning?" "I'm going to my exercise class." "I used to go to exercise classes. I always had such a beautiful figure. More than once a man took photos of me at the beach while I was sunbathing." What kind of weird flex is that?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’d play mental bingo and hope she says more.

THIS. It really does help if you can anticipate all the ridiculous things she will say. Then you will get a dopamine hit when she does actually check off your BINGO Card Of Nonsense and you will feel happy instead of annoyed.

I have one for my MIL. It helps!

[Anonymous]

"Welp, we mainline Pop Tarts in this house granny, so buckle up!"