Kid asked if my son was gay

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kindergartner is a non-binary, gender fluid furry and I can tell you I’d be irate if one of his classmates asked if they were gay!!!!

And if they used the wrong pronouns. Straight to the principal

No, straight to prison!! Hate has no home here!!!!

[Anonymous]

It’s rude to ask about someone’s sexuality, especially a child who may not know. That’s different from kids willingly talking about it. It’s also different from asking someone what their pronouns are.

OP, my advice would differ depending on if the other kid was teasing or a friend who is genuinely curious. For teasing, that gets the kid version of “f off.” For friend, that gets either no or kid version of “dude, weird topic, let’s go play on the monkey bars.”

[Anonymous]

Lock that gay baiter up!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Hello how you handle? My son said no but I still think it’s inappropriate to ever ask someone, much less kids in 3rd grade about their sexuality or identity. Talk to the teacher? Other parent? Do nothing?

My son knows what it means.

I have been shocked how much kids this age talk about this stuff. Whats concerning is that most of them don't really know what the terms actually mean. My kid is 5th grade and has friends who say they are bisexual (but this seems to be used interchangeably with non-binary). The labeling of sexuality and gender at this age seems weird to me for the general population of elem kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Big topic of conversation in 4th grade here

The answers are yes, no or I’m not sure yet.

Why is this hard?

The perception of the number of gay people in the US has recently risen from 10% to 15%. The actual number is 1-2%. Our perception is totally off - and our children's perception is even more off.

agreed. for some kids I know they are fully aware of the gender and sexual preference intuitively from a young age. But now if if a girl doesn't like frilly stuff she thinks she is non-binary. the self-labeling at this age is problematic. But in 4th grade sex ed they talked about all of these labels so I thnk a lot of kids feel like they need to find one for themselves.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Kids are expected to have a sexual identity at very young ages now. Wait until you encounter the pansexual middle-schoolers.

Pansexual means they’ll have sex with male or female, doesn’t matter to them. So glad they discovered that early enough so not wasting any time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:"Oh my! That's a very rude question".

Yes, that’s exactly what a third grader would say.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"Oh my! That's a very rude question".

Yes, that’s exactly what a third grader would say.

Bru….you’re so cringe

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"Oh my! That's a very rude question".

Welcome to the 21st century. No longer rude.

LGBTQ+ is much more accepted now than it used to be and the goal is to remove any stigma with being in any of those demographics. So, stop considering it rude and just answer. If the kid asked your son and he denied and then the kid asked you, I would say "He said he wasn't. Why would you not believe him?"

It is a super rude question as it is asking about a very personal matter. The level of rudeness has nothing to do with whether anything is wrong with any answer. Obviously 3rd graders ask all sorts of rude/invasive questions, but the solution is to teach them not to or at least ignore it rather than deny its a rude/invasive question.

Signed, a gay woman

Not anymore. Now it's a topic of conversation in the cafeteria and playground and in class. It's a different world. Until the kids grow up.

I didn't claim it was uncommon, I claimed it was rude. Of course it is a topic but it's invasive and personal. There is nothing wrong with discussing sexual orientation in the abstract, but to directly ask someone about their orientation is casually asking them to publicize sensitive information that they themselves are still processing and are not ready to share, or to lie, or to refuse to answer the question in a way that makes them a target.

It's also rude to ask adults, btw, but at least they can just make a mental note that you have no manners and move on.

It is no more rude than demanding pronouns. Which is obnoxious and hopefully going out of favor.

Inshallah.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Kids are expected to have a sexual identity at very young ages now. Wait until you encounter the pansexual middle-schoolers.

Oh lord, BARF.
Heaven help us!!!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Hello how you handle? My son said no but I still think it’s inappropriate to ever ask someone, much less kids in 3rd grade about their sexuality or identity. Talk to the teacher? Other parent? Do nothing?

My son knows what it means.

I have been shocked how much kids this age talk about this stuff. Whats concerning is that most of them don't really know what the terms actually mean. My kid is 5th grade and has friends who say they are bisexual (but this seems to be used interchangeably with non-binary). The labeling of sexuality and gender at this age seems weird to me for the general population of elem kids.

I am beyond thrilled my fifth grader and his friends aren’t into dating girls. It’s 24/7 sports, there’s not ONE kid at our amazing little MCPS elementary fifth grade who has publicly changed genders or come out in any way!!! So happy he hasn’t had to deal with that. I know it’s coming in middle school but he will have better tools to navigate it (compassion, friendship and more).

[Anonymous]

My husband told my daughter to respond to a boy who teased and called other boys gay: “Why, are you looking for a boyfriend?”

[Anonymous]

Is this the ballet kid from the other post??

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My kindergartner is a non-binary, gender fluid furry and I can tell you I’d be irate if one of his classmates asked if they were gay!!!!

Thanks for the laugh.

[Anonymous]

I don’t see why this question is a problem.