Why do college students left out of bar-hopping get sympathy, but not college students left out of graduation?

[Anonymous]

It’s a great lesson about life decisions and how they impact your life.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I've heard lots of people tell stories about how they or their children didn't turn 21 until halfway through their senior year, and how terrible it was to be left out and not be able to go out with their friends. However, whenever I tell people about how my son will be graduating this spring after 5 years while he had to watch all his friends graduate last spring, it gets brushed off by everyone, even those who simultaneously think that they or their kid had it rough by not being able to go to bars with their friends. I understand that there are much bigger problems in the world than social isolation. What I don't understand is why it's understandable to feel left out when your friends go to bars without you, but not when your friends graduate without you.

Such a bizarre rant…and complaint. The whole comparison to the bar thing is just off-the-mark. Most college kids we know have “friends” ahead of, along side of, and behind them, especially in programs notorious for taking longer either by design or difficulty (like architecture or engineering).

Your DS should “walk” proudly with his Class…which is the one he leaves with, not the one he started with.

[Anonymous]

All kids have fake ids.
If you complained to me that your kid got left behind by his friends and couldn’t go to bars, I would think your kid is dumb for not getting a fake id.

[Anonymous]

Sympathy? Who cares about this? Is OP's DS worried about either grad school admission or job prospects because his transcripts look bad? How is he left out of graduation? Will he not still graduate? This doesn't make any sense at all.

I graduated in 4.5 years, which means in the winter. This happened because I took a "gap semester" or sorts and went to an immersion language school overseas for a semester. I got some credit for it but not full credit. My choice. No one cares.

[Anonymous]

Dumb

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:All kids have fake ids.
If you complained to me that your kid got left behind by his friends and couldn’t go to bars, I would think your kid is dumb for not getting a fake id.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Everyone assumes the kid that took 5 years to graduate was lazy or had issues.

I could have graduated in 3 years so 5 just sounds wild to me.

Does having issues not warrant sympathy?

[Anonymous]

I would’ve expressed sympathy for your son, OP, if you were talking to me about this in person.

[Anonymous]

I graduated in 3 years and I did not know anyone in my ceremony. Do I deserve sympathy too??

This is stupid op.

[Anonymous]

Graduating in 5 years is not brag worthy and makes me wonder why not in 4?

[Anonymous]

I’ll be kind but it’s not the answer you want, OP. your son didn’t complete college in four years, which often happens for a range of reasons, so why would he participate in a graduation ceremony when it’s not his time to graduate.

I know he would prefer to walk with his friends, but it’s like a junior asking to participate in the ceremony a year early. He will have the opportunity to participate in a graduation ceremony when he actually graduates. Good luck to him.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Graduating in 5 years is not brag worthy and makes me wonder why not in 4?

Brag worthy is almost the opposite of sympathetic.

[Anonymous]

I've never heard anyone complain about either of the things in OP's post. Neither of them would really get much sympathy from me, TBH. Unless the late graduation is from illness. There are so many people with worse problems than either of these.

[Anonymous]

Why did it take 5 years? Too much bar hopping?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I've heard lots of people tell stories about how they or their children didn't turn 21 until halfway through their senior year, and how terrible it was to be left out and not be able to go out with their friends. However, whenever I tell people about how my son will be graduating this spring after 5 years while he had to watch all his friends graduate last spring, it gets brushed off by everyone, even those who simultaneously think that they or their kid had it rough by not being able to go to bars with their friends. I understand that there are much bigger problems in the world than social isolation. What I don't understand is why it's understandable to feel left out when your friends go to bars without you, but not when your friends graduate without you.

My 5th year in college was the time of my life. He's doing it all wrong if he isn't loving it.