You meet someone you like through OLD. How soon would you consider sleeping with them?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:After 3-4 dates but must include daily texting, assuming good connection and building up of attraction.

The one time I slept with someone on date 2 was a mistake. Sex was good but we weren't compatible at all and overall wasn't a good relationship.

Yea, exactly: it’s not like he texts couple times/week plans one movie outing and I’m ready for sex

[Anonymous]

It’s usually 3-5 dates which means there is a lot to like about them thus real potential. But a couple of times it’s been on the first date simply because they were physically very hot even if they didn’t seem to offer much else. I’d briefly regret it but sometimes the body outvotes the mind.

[Anonymous]

Male here, if I really connect with someone on the first date I leave it up to her as I don’t want to come across as pushy or needy. It rarely happens on date 2 and almost always by date 4. I find that when women take the lead on initiating sex the sex will be very good because it is on their terms. When they invite you to their place for dinner that’s a very good sign.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It’s usually 3-5 dates which means there is a lot to like about them thus real potential. But a couple of times it’s been on the first date simply because they were physically very hot even if they didn’t seem to offer much else. I’d briefly regret it but sometimes the body outvotes the mind.

+1 The only guy I ever slept with on a first date I married. It was so out of character for me but the chemistry was amazing. That was almost 30 years ago.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Male here, if I really connect with someone on the first date I leave it up to her as I don’t want to come across as pushy or needy. It rarely happens on date 2 and almost always by date 4. I find that when women take the lead on initiating sex the sex will be very good because it is on their terms. When they invite you to their place for dinner that’s a very good sign.

As a woman I prefer that he invites me to his place for dinner after 3 dates or so

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Male here, if I really connect with someone on the first date I leave it up to her as I don’t want to come across as pushy or needy. It rarely happens on date 2 and almost always by date 4. I find that when women take the lead on initiating sex the sex will be very good because it is on their terms. When they invite you to their place for dinner that’s a very good sign.

As a woman I prefer that he invites me to his place for dinner after 3 dates or so[/quote

You do realize that he expects you for dessert?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Male here, if I really connect with someone on the first date I leave it up to her as I don’t want to come across as pushy or needy. It rarely happens on date 2 and almost always by date 4. I find that when women take the lead on initiating sex the sex will be very good because it is on their terms. When they invite you to their place for dinner that’s a very good sign.

As a woman I prefer that he invites me to his place for dinner after 3 dates or so[/quote

You do realize that he expects you for dessert?

yes, and we would have discussed by then that his GF or wife won't be around

[Anonymous]

But seriously, I'm more comfortable if he's open about his life and invites me to his place. It's easier for me to leave if I don't sleep over after sex if things go wrong etc. Of course we discuss std and single status before then

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Every woman who opened her legs for me on the first date ended up being a mutual on demand hookup. If I like a woman I won't sleep with her on the first date cause I don't want to blow up my chances at a potential relationship. I don't know what happened to women now though so many are ready to hook up by the second date. They are sadly promiscuous just like men.

Well, men had the freedom to sleep with women as fast as they do it fit, so why are we expecting women who want to sleep around to put themselves to higher standards?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Every woman who opened her legs for me on the first date ended up being a mutual on demand hookup. If I like a woman I won't sleep with her on the first date cause I don't want to blow up my chances at a potential relationship. I don't know what happened to women now though so many are ready to hook up by the second date. They are sadly promiscuous just like men.

Not all women are like that: to me it’s couple months. If he’s only a sexual draw/no personality match or only a good person/no sexual attraction I don’t see them after 3 dates. But if all elements for a relationship seem present, I try to see him for 5-6 dates (about a month), ask about recent std testing, if he plans to sleep with others in parallel etc. I also don’t understand why can’t people just use toys to address the physical itch. It’s not just STDs but new partner often brings really painful UTIs for women. Things shake up during sex and I need to adjust physically to him. Would be too much trouble for a casual one off ONS. But that’s me - maybe other women are not as intimately sensitive to carousel of partners

You're replying to a man who confessed to sleep with women on the first date if he didn't see potential, why only women get criticized for this behavior?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Well for me as a guy I’ve had women I met sleep with me the first night multiple times, the second date too.

Most by the third.

If you’re a good looking guy with a good job and stay in shape it’s like shooting fish in a barrel honestly. Lots of thirsty single moms.

If I want something serious - finding her online is not where I look. Every single woman I met online is smash and pass only.

You don't sound like a great catch either.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If I knew from the get go that the person was definitely not relationship material yet I was physically attracted probably right away.

But if I liked them + saw some potential in a future w/them maybe after ten dates.

so no emotional connection needed, just need to be h*rny, right?

I’m a different female, and it happens rather often to me that he’s just making me horny but I don’t feel emotional connection. I keep my knees closed and move on, don't sleep. There are toys for that. If women you were seeing were sleeping with others in parallel, it doesn’t mean all women do that.

Men constantly sleep with women just because they're horny, why do women feel the need to constantly do the "not all women are like that" to a bunch of hypocritical men? It's almost like your sense of self-worth depends on what men think of you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Every woman who opened her legs for me on the first date ended up being a mutual on demand hookup. If I like a woman I won't sleep with her on the first date cause I don't want to blow up my chances at a potential relationship. I don't know what happened to women now though so many are ready to hook up by the second date. They are sadly promiscuous just like men.

Not all women are like that: to me it’s couple months. If he’s only a sexual draw/no personality match or only a good person/no sexual attraction I don’t see them after 3 dates. But if all elements for a relationship seem present, I try to see him for 5-6 dates (about a month), ask about recent std testing, if he plans to sleep with others in parallel etc. I also don’t understand why can’t people just use toys to address the physical itch. It’s not just STDs but new partner often brings really painful UTIs for women. Things shake up during sex and I need to adjust physically to him. Would be too much trouble for a casual one off ONS. But that’s me - maybe other women are not as intimately sensitive to carousel of partners

You're replying to a man who confessed to sleep with women on the first date if he didn't see potential, why only women get criticized for this behavior?

I'm not criticizing them, just saying it amazes me how some women can do this physically. Sounds like way more trouble to women to engage in ONS (pregnancy risks, higher risks of catching stds vs men, risk of criminal behaviors etc). Maybe people assume these women are overall less stable and are risk seekers which is not a good relationship material?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If I knew from the get go that the person was definitely not relationship material yet I was physically attracted probably right away.

But if I liked them + saw some potential in a future w/them maybe after ten dates.

so no emotional connection needed, just need to be h*rny, right?

I’m a different female, and it happens rather often to me that he’s just making me horny but I don’t feel emotional connection. I keep my knees closed and move on, don't sleep. There are toys for that. If women you were seeing were sleeping with others in parallel, it doesn’t mean all women do that.

Men constantly sleep with women just because they're horny, why do women feel the need to constantly do the "not all women are like that" to a bunch of hypocritical men? It's almost like your sense of self-worth depends on what men think of you.

I just don't want to waste my time on these one night endeavors: men might call me, ask for more, and I have many more suitors who are better matches to pursue.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Every woman who opened her legs for me on the first date ended up being a mutual on demand hookup. If I like a woman I won't sleep with her on the first date cause I don't want to blow up my chances at a potential relationship. I don't know what happened to women now though so many are ready to hook up by the second date. They are sadly promiscuous just like men.

Not all women are like that: to me it’s couple months. If he’s only a sexual draw/no personality match or only a good person/no sexual attraction I don’t see them after 3 dates. But if all elements for a relationship seem present, I try to see him for 5-6 dates (about a month), ask about recent std testing, if he plans to sleep with others in parallel etc. I also don’t understand why can’t people just use toys to address the physical itch. It’s not just STDs but new partner often brings really painful UTIs for women. Things shake up during sex and I need to adjust physically to him. Would be too much trouble for a casual one off ONS. But that’s me - maybe other women are not as intimately sensitive to carousel of partners

You're replying to a man who confessed to sleep with women on the first date if he didn't see potential, why only women get criticized for this behavior?

I'm not criticizing them, just saying it amazes me how some women can do this physically. Sounds like way more trouble to women to engage in ONS (pregnancy risks, higher risks of catching stds vs men, risk of criminal behaviors etc). Maybe people assume these women are overall less stable and are risk seekers which is not a good relationship material?

Exactly my point, does it amaze you when men sleep or try to sleep with women on a first date? Men do catch STDs and get set up for robberies that way after all. Do you also think people are justify in seeing these men as less stable and not relationship material?