Would you attend a wedding if you were obviously on “the B list”?

[Anonymous]

Hell yeah you should go. One of the best times I ever had at a wedding we were at like Table 43 out in the GD parking lot. Just a motley crew of rando childhood friends, the drunk cousins, guys from work (that was me), and various and sundry other misfits. It was a blast. Get a little buzz going, swap stories with the other weirdos, wreak havoc on the dance floor and a solid Irish Goodbye when you’re ready to move on.

No pressure, no obligation to chat with relatives, and the couple couldn’t care less that your there. It’s great.

[Anonymous]

I would talk to the bride and tell her what you are feeling. Then see how she responds.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You shouldn't go because you're a loser.

Biiiiiiiitch alert!

If anyone is that, it's OP. Second tier? Life must be really miserable when keeping score!

[Anonymous]

She shouldn't have posted so much on social media. It's her posting that let you on about being second tier. If she is generally a good friend, just let it go and attend.

[Anonymous]

Tell her you have already committed to another wedding.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You shouldn't go because you're a loser.

Biiiiiiiitch alert!

If anyone is that, it's OP. Second tier? Life must be really miserable when keeping score!

My mother always taught me that it was bad manners to hand out invitations or discuss a party in front of people not invited. Posting this all over social media seems similar.

[Anonymous]

I would reconsider being her friend just based on the lack of tact she demonstrates with her social media.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would talk to the bride and tell her what you are feeling. Then see how she responds.

DO NOT DO THIS

[Anonymous]

I did - I had a great time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I always feel like I'm the last person invited to a wedding. And that's FINE! Someone has to be the last invitee and I love weddings. Imma cha cha slide my way to the bar and say something embarrassing in the wedding video.

I ❤️ u, pp.

[Anonymous]

Do you want to go to the wedding? Then go. Who cares about the timing of the invitation.

It's not nearly as weird as the time my husband and I got a save the date. We saved the date but never got an invitation.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Right before my wedding I had a number of family members cancel due to unforeseen circumstances. I then asked some coworkers who I was friendly with if they would like to come (wedding was local), but I was upfront and honest about the cancellations, and I told them “please do not bring a gift, just come enjoy yourselves and a nice meal and open bar and some dancing!”

This is of course a much better way to handle it, especially when you’ve posted all over social media!

If local or a fun place (and I didn’t have plans), I’d probably go and have a good time. However, if it’s a long service, dry or paid booze reception, I’d feel zero obligation to attend and decline.

[Anonymous]

My DC is getting married soon. We have decided to call only those people that we would be happy to see at the wedding. So, all the prospective guests are certainly included in the master guest list.

And since we cannot invite everyone - because of space, location, money etc. we have to pick a certain number from that master list. Sometimes, we have to give a +1 invite to a single person, a +3 to the family of another friend/relative etc, so that they can easily attend the wedding with everyone they value in their personal life. We are doing everything that we can so that our guests find it convenient to attend. And that means that many people who we want to attend but cannot fit, we can only invite when someone else declines. Trust me that every one we invite are welcome and loved.

We don't post on social media. But, that is just us. There is no reason that we have to judge people who do post on social media. I don't post on social media because I am not on social media. I am not on social media because I used to get major FOMO and jealousy looking at people's fabulous life on SM. Even when I knew that SM was fake, I had the tendency to get impacted as we all like to believe our eyes. It was toxic to my mental health.

OP, if you cannot handle social media, you need to get off of it. It is making you unhappy. Go and enjoy life and if you want to attend the wedding, go with a joyous heart and gratefulness to the universe that you are on their master guest list.

[Anonymous]

Go to the free party. Have a great time. Forget the present.

[Anonymous]

OP, yes you are being petty. Weddings are expensive ordeals where you can't invite everyone who you might want to. Perhaps MIL through a hissy about having one of her business associates on the invite list. Maybe not inviting cousin Larlo, who you haven't seen since you were a kid, would make Aunt Larla cut your mother off from the family. These things are complicated. You got invited. Congrats. Put your ego aside.