Appropriate punishment for DD?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wow op this is a big deal. She is hanging with a bad crowd. Hell to the no for the concert. I would be looking at other schools for her and banning her from seeing those friends. Grounded for a month and drive her to and from school. 3 day suspension! On her record! Big deal. There are no mitigating circumstances, op. It will get much harder from here if you don’t crack down. Chances are when she is an adult she will wish you had patented more seriously as she’s hurting her chances of future success and you are enabling her. B

Why do you assume she’s hanging out with a bad crowd? Maybe she’s the bad crowd, the ring leader who found some followers. Blaming “the crowd” is just excuse making.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would sell the tickets and have her doing community service cleaning bathrooms.

I would do the same.

[Anonymous]

No way for the concert

Are you kidding?

Sounds like she’s for the streets already

[Anonymous]

Weird situation at school. Are you on crack? She vandalized public property! Were the police involved? If not, she is EXTREMELY lucky. And, your question is about going to a concert?? Please parent your child.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The two are unrelated, OP.

Depending on the nature of the events you're not describing, I would have an appropriate consequence for the toilet-clogging.

She can go to the concert as planned.

The appropriate punishment is being grounded - home except school, sports, extra curricular. No friends, phone only for emergency use, and no electronics outside school work. NO concerts, no nothing. This was very very serious. And, a written apology to the school/principal.

Destroying school property and being suspended for three days is serious.

[Anonymous]

No concert. My dad canceled a ski trip to Utah because of lack of effort/bad grades in school. It was a wake up call.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DD has been involved in weird situation at school. Not completley her fault, but an incident has resulted in a 3 day suspension. For some context: she and her friends were purposefully clogging the toilets in an attempt to overflow the school. Yes, I know, unbelivable, but there's some additional context that is not worth getting into. Bottom line is, she is attending the Drizzy Drake and Jermaine Cole tour "big as the what?" should I let her go? Or is it reasomable enough to not let her go even though we've already bought the tickets and it would be too much of a hassle to sell them and she has been working hard and looking forward to it. Obviously she did something wrong but she has been working hard in school and im still proud of her. Help me out here.

I’m a huge fan of the custodians in our schools and would be pissed beyond belief at any kids who did that. But I’m also a fan of natural consequences. She’s getting suspended that’s a pretty big deal, additionally, she should have a consequence that relates to the hard work of cleaning up a mess of that nature. Like something really gross. But I tend to agree that taking away the concert isn’t really related to this situation so seems pretty arbitrary and disconnected.

Agree. I know kids do stupid things, but I would be furious over a transgression like this. The engineers and custodians at my kids’ schools are fantastic.

[Anonymous]

are any of the other kids who got suspended also going to that concert? It might be good to see what the other parents are doing so you all could have a similar punishment.

[Anonymous]

Has OP even responded again since Page 1? Seriously, this forum needs a "Troll Lock" on discussions like these where all signs point to trolling. Because one thing DCUM has PLENTY OF is people with waaaay too much time on their hands and waaaay to LITTLE of a social life so they love posting things here that just get everyone's hair raised.

[Anonymous]

This seems like the kind of tour where there will be drugs and other bad behavior. I wouldn’t put her in an environment likely to push her down a bad path.

[Anonymous]

I need to know more of a back story about he toilet clogging? What methods were they using? Tampons? What was the rationale for this?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What context could there possibly be for purposefully clogging school toilets that would make it even a little okay?

Was it the toilet clogging that got 3 days? Or were they trying to get rid of something by flushing it down the toilet - vape pen, etc? I think there’s something more more here.

[Anonymous]

Put her in charge of cleaning household toilets for three months=one month per day of suspension at once a week. (Clorox wands aren’t too punitive.)

Will help her consider those who would’ve had to clean the resulting mess at school while granting a new life skill.

[Anonymous]

Make her write letters of apology to the custodian. Have her buy nice Xmas presents for them using her money. Make sure she hands her letters to the staff and delivers the presents.

[Anonymous]

overreact much?

Anonymous wrote:She commits vandalism and would be allowed to go to a concert? Wtf? She’s shown poor judgment. I would not allow concerts for her now until she’s 18.