Is this normal for a date night babysitter?

[Anonymous]

All kids are different. Some may stop crying but some literally never will. No sane parent would leave such young kids with total stranger.

[Anonymous]

It sucks that you had to cancel your dinner plans, but why on earth didn’t you convert the evening into the opportunity for your children to get to know the babysitter? You and your dh could have stayed, gotten takeout, and let the babysitter play with the kids while you were in another room. Then the next time she came over, you wouldn’t be new clients and this policy wouldn’t apply. Sending her home was a mistake.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Nanny here - That’s totally bizarre. I wouldn’t have a job if that was my policy! Sounds super unprofessional, a good nanny should know how to distract and console upset children. I’ve been with the same family for years and last week the 6 year old (out of nowhere) started crying when her dad left the house. Imagine if I told my boss I was leaving to go home lol

OP said this woman was babysitting. She may not be a nanny but just do babysitting as a side gig and didn’t think three screaming kids was worth the money.

[Anonymous]

I would never leave my kids with a complete stranger.

Have her come over for a night that you don’t leave do the kids get to know her.

I’d pay her for her time.

When you have kids things don’t always go as planned, get used to it.

[Anonymous]

1st problem - 3 kids.
2nd - 3 kids under 3
3rd - new babysitter and kids used to grandparents.


This was a disaster waiting to happen. But, kudos to the babysitter for making up a policy and bailing.

[Anonymous]

I had a similar experience and called back home about 45 minutes after leaving. I think the sitter didn't try hard enough and just gave up. That said, I wouldn't want my kids to be that upset with someone. We paid for the whole night.

[Anonymous]

Why do people keep saying 3 kids under 3?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Nanny here - That’s totally bizarre. I wouldn’t have a job if that was my policy! Sounds super unprofessional, a good nanny should know how to distract and console upset children. I’ve been with the same family for years and last week the 6 year old (out of nowhere) started crying when her dad left the house. Imagine if I told my boss I was leaving to go home lol

OP said this woman was babysitting. She may not be a nanny but just do babysitting as a side gig and didn’t think three screaming kids was worth the money.

I would have done the same thing as the babysitter. The idea of three screaming children for hours on end,! No thank you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I can’t imagine choosing to leave my young children with someone I’d never met so I could go out to dinner.

+2

You left 3 kids under 3 with neither you nor the kids have interacted or met??

Did you really expect none of the kids not to cry or get upset?

Is this not what a babysitter is? I babysat all the time in middle and high school and often kids would cry when parents departed and then after they left I'd distract and play and life was fine. We've never hired a babysitter yet because mine is little but amazed by these comments

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You should have paid her for her time. I don't think its unreasonable if they would not settle.

Time doing what? We never even left.

The 15 minutes she played with them, gas money. She took time to get there.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Nanny here - That’s totally bizarre. I wouldn’t have a job if that was my policy! Sounds super unprofessional, a good nanny should know how to distract and console upset children. I’ve been with the same family for years and last week the 6 year old (out of nowhere) started crying when her dad left the house. Imagine if I told my boss I was leaving to go home lol

OP said this woman was babysitting. She may not be a nanny but just do babysitting as a side gig and didn’t think three screaming kids was worth the money.

I would have done the same thing as the babysitter. The idea of three screaming children for hours on end,! No thank you.

+1 and if you know your kids are screamers you should have done a test session. Everyone can’t tolerate high maintenance kids. Good for babysitter for setting boundaries!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We tried to go on a date night last night and hired a young woman who babysat several times for from friends. They said great things about her and had done a background and reference check so we felt comfortable using her despite not having met her.

Usually my parents babysit but they are out of town. Kids are 11 months, 2 and 3.5. Babysitter came 30 minutes before we were going to leave the kids and all was well. They were all four were playing on the floor and we were going over the schedule. The kids seemed happy and engaged but when we were going to leave the 3.5 year old got upset which upset the other two and before you know it all three were crying. Babysitter tried to distract and DH got in the car as I tried to settle the baby. After 15 minutes everything became elevated so I was just going to leave (I figured they’d settle once I did) but the babysitter she had a policy that she wouldn’t stay with upset kiddos if it was her first time with them because it sets up a bad precedent. She said we could try again and maybe they needed to spend more time with her first. She apologized and I tried for 15 minutes to settle them before I just gave up and had her leave. She didn’t ask for any money, which was nice but we had to cancel reservations and got ready for nothing.

I mentioned it to a friend and she said that was weird. A good babysitter should know how to handle upset kids.

Is this normal? First time with non-family babysitter so am not sure.

Say Bye Bye to date nights!

[Anonymous]

I think she invented the policy right then, based on what she was seeing…

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Nanny here - That’s totally bizarre. I wouldn’t have a job if that was my policy! Sounds super unprofessional, a good nanny should know how to distract and console upset children. I’ve been with the same family for years and last week the 6 year old (out of nowhere) started crying when her dad left the house. Imagine if I told my boss I was leaving to go home lol

You’ve been w the same family for years — Obviously the scenario you presented is completely different than the first-time random sitter hired for 3 screaming toddlers who have only been cared for family.

Umm no, I have many years of experience and also work with an agency to babysit at hotels for families coming to town on holiday. Ideally you could have done a trial, but this is nothing new and this nanny sounds very inexperienced.

Ummmmm you never said any of that in your original post so why are you ummmm acting like people should have ummmmm known your personal details? This info is more pertinent than what happened with a 6 year old in your regular nanny family….so ummmmm why didn’t you just say this first?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why do people keep saying 3 kids under 3?

Ok, is 3 kids 3 and under better for the official record? 🙄