Is this normal for a date night babysitter?
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Anonymous
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We tried to go on a date night last night and hired a young woman who babysat several times for from friends. They said great things about her and had done a background and reference check so we felt comfortable using her despite not having met her.
Usually my parents babysit but they are out of town. Kids are 11 months, 2 and 3.5. Babysitter came 30 minutes before we were going to leave the kids and all was well. They were all four were playing on the floor and we were going over the schedule. The kids seemed happy and engaged but when we were going to leave the 3.5 year old got upset which upset the other two and before you know it all three were crying. Babysitter tried to distract and DH got in the car as I tried to settle the baby. After 15 minutes everything became elevated so I was just going to leave (I figured they’d settle once I did) but the babysitter she had a policy that she wouldn’t stay with upset kiddos if it was her first time with them because it sets up a bad precedent. She said we could try again and maybe they needed to spend more time with her first. She apologized and I tried for 15 minutes to settle them before I just gave up and had her leave. She didn’t ask for any money, which was nice but we had to cancel reservations and got ready for nothing. I mentioned it to a friend and she said that was weird. A good babysitter should know how to handle upset kids. Is this normal? First time with non-family babysitter so am not sure. |
Anonymous
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Never heard of a policy like that. Of course kids are upset the first time with a new sitter!! So weird.
I would excuse it if it were a teen sitter, because three crying kids that young is a lot for a teen. But a grown, experienced sitter should be able to handle. |
Anonymous
My thoughts too. She’s probably in her mid 20s. |
Anonymous
| You should have paid her for her time. I don't think its unreasonable if they would not settle. |
Anonymous
Time doing what? We never even left. |
Anonymous
| With those ages you should have done a trial run. |
Anonymous
This. |
Anonymous
| New poster here. What does a trial run entail? |
Anonymous
She wasn’t at the house during the 15 minutes in which you couldn’t console the baby? |
Anonymous
She didn't DO anything and bailed on her commitment. |
Anonymous
NP. I usually have a new sitter come for an afternoon for 2-3 hours on a weekend. Low stakes, everyone gets to meet and hang out, get a little familiar, before the sitter comes and we are out for the night. Our kids are older (4 and 7) but having someone else do bedtime and the idea of not seeing us until tomorrow is kind of a big deal. It goes much more smoothly if they’ve had a chance to meet and play first. I usually schedule a trial run a week or so before the event I need the sitter for - I schedule both the trial run and the even at the same time. I’ve had a couple of non-preferred sitters but never someone who it didn’t work out for them to sit for the scheduled event. |
Anonymous
| Did she really say she wouldn’t stay with upset “kiddos?” |
Anonymous
| I don’t think I would have done that as a babysitter but I can’t really blame her. That’s a lot of small kids to handle if they can’t transition. You should have just had her come after the baby’s bedtime at least. |
Anonymous
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I would be upset. When I pay a babysitter, it's because I have an event to attend. That event might be super-important, not just a date night.
That said, with such young kids, and three of them, I would have done a trial run, meaning invited the babysitter to play with the kids when parents are still in the house. Paid, of course. |
Anonymous
| I have heard of that before. I don’t know if it’s common, weird or if it’s a good policy. |