Open house attire/conspicuous consumption

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes there are a lot of basic moms in private schools, they have money so they wear basic things.

What does it mean when you call someone "basic"? Obviously a mild insult? Can you explain the pop culture connotation? it's not a descriptor I use or have heard my tween employ

women who have predictable or unoriginal style, interests, or behavior

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes there are a lot of basic moms in private schools, they have money so they wear basic things.

What does it mean when you call someone "basic"? Obviously a mild insult? Can you explain the pop culture connotation? it's not a descriptor I use or have heard my tween employ

My 14 DD uses this term and “basic” means unoriginal, unexceptional, and mainstream. She recently used the word to describe the students at an all girls school where she shadowed.

[Anonymous]

Driving a Tesla and wearing Chanel flats would be basic.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wouldn't know a "Chanel flat" if I ran over it in my Honda Accord. Ditto all the other names you dropped, OP.

I think you're keeping score in a game no one else is actually playing.

DP. I think most people are playing a game that you don't even know is going on around you.

I would much rather be unaware of the game than feeling like I was constantly losing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wouldn't know a "Chanel flat" if I ran over it in my Honda Accord. Ditto all the other names you dropped, OP.

I think you're keeping score in a game no one else is actually playing.

DP. I think most people are playing a game that you don't even know is going on around you.

I would much rather be unaware of the game than feeling like I was constantly losing.

Watch them play checkers while you play chess.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wouldn't know a "Chanel flat" if I ran over it in my Honda Accord. Ditto all the other names you dropped, OP.

I think you're keeping score in a game no one else is actually playing.

DP. I think most people are playing a game that you don't even know is going on around you.

I would much rather be unaware of the game than feeling like I was constantly losing.

Watch them play checkers while you play chess.

You can watch primates fight for social standing at the zoo without having to live their life.

[Anonymous]

Ok,
Seems like thread only talks about moms?


We are a wealthy family. High 7 figure income.


My wife wears many of the items you mention here on a daily basis to her DC based political job. It’s just part of her normal every day look. Cartier bracelets, Van Cleef necklace or so, some sort of Gucci shoes and maybe even an Chanel/Dior bag among other stuff.

So when we went to open houses, this is “normal” everyday clothing for her. It is not special and she is not trying any harder than any other day of her normal life. What she is wearing is basically a blouse and maybe designer jeans.


What “we” saw as annoying was women dressed up like they were going to a gala. High heels, fancy dress, and of course a full face of a makeup, eyeliner like they were going to a fancy Xmas party. And what’s worse is when you see a women with a full face of heavy makeup on a Saturday morning tour.


Also, the truly rich people, more so than us, are probably the ones wearing Nike sneakers and nothing designer at all. Or possible wearing something high style that is unbranded from the outside that may be worth 10k and you would never know it by liking. But the wealthy “in” crowd can figure what you are wearing.


Kid if like truly wealthy people would never buy a LV bag with LV all over it like college teens do to show off they have a LV bag, they would buy some designer bag with no outside branding worth 15k.

When she gets really dressed I

[Anonymous]

The conspicuous consumption we observed several years ago was definitely more obscene at some schools than others, and it doesn’t necessarily correlate with wealth. To name some names: Potomac had parents who were covered in labels. Like, men wearing Burberry shirts that have the trademark pattern on the elbows or collar. Sorry, my DH has and wears several Burberry suits and they don’t have the trademark pattern on them anywhere; that’s a choice a person makes, not just a reflection that they spend money on high quality clothes.

Many if not all private schools are going to have wealthy families but they aren’t necessarily going to have SO many visible or flashy individuals.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Ok,
Seems like thread only talks about moms?


We are a wealthy family. High 7 figure income.


My wife wears many of the items you mention here on a daily basis to her DC based political job. It’s just part of her normal every day look. Cartier bracelets, Van Cleef necklace or so, some sort of Gucci shoes and maybe even an Chanel/Dior bag among other stuff.

So when we went to open houses, this is “normal” everyday clothing for her. It is not special and she is not trying any harder than any other day of her normal life. What she is wearing is basically a blouse and maybe designer jeans.


What “we” saw as annoying was women dressed up like they were going to a gala. High heels, fancy dress, and of course a full face of a makeup, eyeliner like they were going to a fancy Xmas party. And what’s worse is when you see a women with a full face of heavy makeup on a Saturday morning tour.


Also, the truly rich people, more so than us, are probably the ones wearing Nike sneakers and nothing designer at all. Or possible wearing something high style that is unbranded from the outside that may be worth 10k and you would never know it by liking. But the wealthy “in” crowd can figure what you are wearing.


Kid if like truly wealthy people would never buy a LV bag with LV all over it like college teens do to show off they have a LV bag, they would buy some designer bag with no outside branding worth 15k.

When she gets really dressed I

And she has the 20k bags, 30k plus Cartier/Van Cleef/ other designers you have heard of jewelry that she never wears except some formal event of some sort. All the stuff mentioned above she wears routinely is her basic “cheap” stuff

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The conspicuous consumption we observed several years ago was definitely more obscene at some schools than others, and it doesn’t necessarily correlate with wealth. To name some names: Potomac had parents who were covered in labels. Like, men wearing Burberry shirts that have the trademark pattern on the elbows or collar. Sorry, my DH has and wears several Burberry suits and they don’t have the trademark pattern on them anywhere; that’s a choice a person makes, not just a reflection that they spend money on high quality clothes.

Many if not all private schools are going to have wealthy families but they aren’t necessarily going to have SO many visible or flashy individuals.

Sad thing is if you go shop at designer stores, many of the items have their label on them. So do not. Yes, many of my clothes are designer and have no labels on the outside. But many of the ones I like and fit well do have labels. I don’t really care if you approve of me wearing them as I’m not wearing them to be flashy. For me this is my typical/baseline style level. I like the way the clothes fit and how they feel. I am not wearing them to be flashy to you nor do I care what you think of me wearing these clothes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We’ve attended a few open houses and tours lately. This is our first experience with DC private schools.

Many of the other moms are wearing conspicuous designer items. I’ve seen more Chanel flats, Gucci bags, Van Cleef bracelets/necklaces, Hermes belts, and Cartier love bracelets in the past few weeks than I’ve ever seen in my life.

Is this typical for these types of parents, or are they just dressing like this for the open houses to signal wealth and status?

I would get used to this if you are going private. Keep in mind a Cartier love bangle is literally attached to one’s wrist. You need a special screwdriver to take it off! Also, “love bangle stacks” are very common and popular at local area privates.

I don't know why this feels kind of icky to me, but I also have mild claustrophobia

It’s not just you, I would absolutely freak out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s sort of funny. DCUM spends so much time telling you “real” rich people don’t wear expensive brands or drive expensive cars. It must be jarring to have that narrative so throughly rebuked.

Is it being rebuked, though? Or is OP attending open houses with a bunch of UMC women wanting to signal wealth with accessories like that basic-as-hell Cartier love bracelet?

Ok this is the comment I was waiting for 🤭🤭. I can’t even afford them but I absolutely hate that knock off Kate Spade aka Cartier love bracelet.

[Anonymous]

Guys, clothes aren’t that expensive. Even really expensive clothes. This isn’t a big deal.

Some people drive cars that are worth 40 or 50k more than other cars that also drive around the same way and people don’t freak out at them. Nobody is giving the moms and insanely hard time for driving a Volvo so why all the animosity about a $5k handbag or whatever?

I don’t think it’s a big deal if people wear labels. If I don’t have a Chanel bag but I spent $50k buying my kid a children’s hunter, does that make me a better person? You’re just harping on the handbag because it’s visible and you know the price tag.

If someone wants a $5k handbag it’s not hurting me. I don’t understand why people feel attacked.

[Anonymous]

I’m old and my kids are old so I’m not sure if the maret vibe is different in the lower & middle schools, but I’ve always appreciated that it’s generally very low key. In the old days of bounce house or trampoline park type parties where parents might hang around, dressing up would be wearing jeans instead of yoga pants. I rarely wear make up and don’t feel out of place. It’s been a few years since I’ve worked and open house, but typically we’d Al wear jeans and a maret shirt. There are some who are more stylish and might wear labels, but they’re the outliers.

Maybe try the Maret open house and see if that’s still the vibe?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We’ve attended a few open houses and tours lately. This is our first experience with DC private schools.

Many of the other moms are wearing conspicuous designer items. I’ve seen more Chanel flats, Gucci bags, Van Cleef bracelets/necklaces, Hermes belts, and Cartier love bracelets in the past few weeks than I’ve ever seen in my life.

Is this typical for these types of parents, or are they just dressing like this for the open houses to signal wealth and status?

“If you’re seeing it, it’s for you.”

Honestly OP, I wouldn’t recognize a single item you listed.

This. I don’t know what this stuff is. Don’t care one way or another