Boy almost 14, no sign of puberty - would you be concerned?

[Anonymous]

My son did not have any signs of puberty until age 14.5. I just looked back at pictures our of curiosity (it was all a blur as that was 2020 and we were quarantined at home).

He's now almost 17 and still growing.

I don't think 14 is that late for puberty. My son attends a boys' school and there were a TON of super tiny boys in his class at age 14. Now at 17 they're all much taller, etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Agreed on talking to his ped as a more reasonable way to assuage one's concerns generally, but on the other hand, I would be willing to bet a fair amount of money that no ped is going to be like, "oh your not yet 14 year old is 5'3" and has no visible signs of puberty (based on a parent, rather than doctor's, assessment), definitely time to FTFO."


Kid is 14 next week and pediatrician appointment is a few days later, as indicated in OP, but thanks for being condescending.


How do you view those first two facts as playing in? I don't. Of course ask, but the kid is not yet even 14 and is as tall as me, a grown adult person.

Honestly, I am somewhat sorry to have been snappy, but on the other hand, as someone married to a short guy (5'5") and the mom of two boys who are likely to be short, I am pretty sick of people on DCUM pathologizing and having massive anxiety about shortness within the range of normal. It's ridiculous. If someone acted this way about a kid being slightly overweight, they would get jumped all over.

Did you actually pay attention to my OP? It’s not about height but about the onset of puberty. Height is relevant because both his parents are VERY tall. So this isn’t like your experience. Yes, it would be very odd and something would be wrong if I, I woman who is not far off 6’ had a 5’5” adult son with my similarly (very) tall husband.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Agreed on talking to his ped as a more reasonable way to assuage one's concerns generally, but on the other hand, I would be willing to bet a fair amount of money that no ped is going to be like, "oh your not yet 14 year old is 5'3" and has no visible signs of puberty (based on a parent, rather than doctor's, assessment), definitely time to FTFO."


Kid is 14 next week and pediatrician appointment is a few days later, as indicated in OP, but thanks for being condescending.


How do you view those first two facts as playing in? I don't. Of course ask, but the kid is not yet even 14 and is as tall as me, a grown adult person.

Honestly, I am somewhat sorry to have been snappy, but on the other hand, as someone married to a short guy (5'5") and the mom of two boys who are likely to be short, I am pretty sick of people on DCUM pathologizing and having massive anxiety about shortness within the range of normal. It's ridiculous. If someone acted this way about a kid being slightly overweight, they would get jumped all over.

I have a DS who is the same age and hasn't started puberty. This isn't about the height, at least for us. It's about physical maturity. We're not worried about final height. Every thread has talked about this - physical maturity.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP's son is the youngest possible age for his grade as well.
This is one reason people redshirt boys with September birthdays.

100% this. Some freshman kids will already be 15 or turning 15 shortly thereafter.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP's son is the youngest possible age for his grade as well.
This is one reason people redshirt boys with September birthdays.

+1

My DS is a late bloomer (AND one of the older kids in his grade due to bday - not redshirted) it would be even worse if he had a late bday and was sent on time.

For the parents asking about redshirting on the elementary forums, I always tell them “go and search ‘puberty’ on the teen forum”….

It isn’t the be all end all, or the most important thing in the grand scheme, but late blooming boys tend to have a very rough time during certain periods- middle school and early high school. It is something to consider.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP's son is the youngest possible age for his grade as well.
This is one reason people redshirt boys with September birthdays.

+1

My DS is a late bloomer (AND one of the older kids in his grade due to bday - not redshirted) it would be even worse if he had a late bday and was sent on time.

For the parents asking about redshirting on the elementary forums, I always tell them “go and search ‘puberty’ on the teen forum”….

It isn’t the be all end all, or the most important thing in the grand scheme, but late blooming boys tend to have a very rough time during certain periods- middle school and early high school. It is something to consider.

OP here. I never considered red shirting him and would never do. He was so academically advanced as a preschooler he had to wait years for the other kids (and the teaching) to catch up with him. He’s still very advanced academically (eg taking calculus in 9th grade). Red shirting him would have just been a waste of a year. That he’s small isn’t an issue, but I am wondering about puberty.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP's son is the youngest possible age for his grade as well.
This is one reason people redshirt boys with September birthdays.

+1

My DS is a late bloomer (AND one of the older kids in his grade due to bday - not redshirted) it would be even worse if he had a late bday and was sent on time.

For the parents asking about redshirting on the elementary forums, I always tell them “go and search ‘puberty’ on the teen forum”….

It isn’t the be all end all, or the most important thing in the grand scheme, but late blooming boys tend to have a very rough time during certain periods- middle school and early high school. It is something to consider.

OP here. I never considered red shirting him and would never do. He was so academically advanced as a preschooler he had to wait years for the other kids (and the teaching) to catch up with him. He’s still very advanced academically (eg taking calculus in 9th grade). Red shirting him would have just been a waste of a year. That he’s small isn’t an issue, but I am wondering about puberty.

I have a very similar kid. Doctor isn't worried at all. Go see an endocrinologist if you are concerned. That's your best option. There is a huge range of sizes starting 9th/HS.

[Anonymous]

Honestly, I’d be concerned if he has absolutely zero signs of puberty at 14th birthday because that is genuinely quite delayed. The outward signs (voice, growth, etc) usually don’t show up for quite awhile AFTER the first signs appear…so it could be awhile yet. That scenario is quite a bit different than some of the other posters where the kid hasn’t had a growth spurt yet (but has started puberty, just not very far along).

Still, it isn’t that uncommon by any means. There is such a range. I’m sure at this age the ped will address it, and may order some tests.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP's son is the youngest possible age for his grade as well.
This is one reason people redshirt boys with September birthdays.

100% this. Some freshman kids will already be 15 or turning 15 shortly thereafter.

That is absurd and not developmentally appropriate.

[Anonymous]

Haven’t read all the responses but likely a constitutional growth delay. My friend’s 14.5 year old had it, measured as an 11.5 year old during the bone (growth plate) scan. Mom and dad are tall and the kid is predicted by the endocrinologist to be over six feet tall. Fwiw the kid is a rising sophomore now and went from 4’11.5” as a rising freshman to 5’.4.5” as a rising sophomore.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The first thing I noticed about DS regarding puberty was his eyebrows. One day, he came down for breakfast, and I kept looking at him. There was something different about him, and I couldn't quite put my finger on it. Then it hit me: his eyebrows were darker (fair skin and reddish hair), and fuller. Prior to, his eyebrows were like a child's: thinner and lighter.

Funny that you mention that because I noticed that on my almost 12 year old. It was like an overnight change. He also has reddish hair

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP's son is the youngest possible age for his grade as well.
This is one reason people redshirt boys with September birthdays.

+1

My DS is a late bloomer (AND one of the older kids in his grade due to bday - not redshirted) it would be even worse if he had a late bday and was sent on time.

For the parents asking about redshirting on the elementary forums, I always tell them “go and search ‘puberty’ on the teen forum”….

It isn’t the be all end all, or the most important thing in the grand scheme, but late blooming boys tend to have a very rough time during certain periods- middle school and early high school. It is something to consider.

OP here. I never considered red shirting him and would never do. He was so academically advanced as a preschooler he had to wait years for the other kids (and the teaching) to catch up with him. He’s still very advanced academically (eg taking calculus in 9th grade). Red shirting him would have just been a waste of a year. That he’s small isn’t an issue, but I am wondering about puberty.

Maybe you should ask your son to figure out what’s going on. He sounds smarter than you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP's son is the youngest possible age for his grade as well.
This is one reason people redshirt boys with September birthdays.

+1

My DS is a late bloomer (AND one of the older kids in his grade due to bday - not redshirted) it would be even worse if he had a late bday and was sent on time.

For the parents asking about redshirting on the elementary forums, I always tell them “go and search ‘puberty’ on the teen forum”….

It isn’t the be all end all, or the most important thing in the grand scheme, but late blooming boys tend to have a very rough time during certain periods- middle school and early high school. It is something to consider.

OP here. I never considered red shirting him and would never do. He was so academically advanced as a preschooler he had to wait years for the other kids (and the teaching) to catch up with him. He’s still very advanced academically (eg taking calculus in 9th grade). Red shirting him would have just been a waste of a year. That he’s small isn’t an issue, but I am wondering about puberty.

oh FFS.

[Anonymous]

OP here. I never considered red shirting him and would never do. He was so academically advanced as a preschooler he had to wait years for the other kids (and the teaching) to catch up with him. He’s still very advanced academically (eg taking calculus in 9th grade). Red shirting him would have just been a waste of a year. That he’s small isn’t an issue, but I am wondering about puberty.

OP, ask his doctor. I assume you are not examining his genitalia. You seem overly anxious, but talking to his ped can likely put your mind at ease.

FWIW, my son just turned 14 and has some signs of puberty - e.g., he has to shave, his voice changed - even though he only 5'4". However, although many of his friends clearly have gone through puberty (tall, muscle mass), he certainly has friends around his height that do not appear to have started. However, of course, I am not examining them for their Tanner stage.

[Anonymous]

OP here. I never considered red shirting him and would never do. He was so academically advanced as a preschooler he had to wait years for the other kids (and the teaching) to catch up with him. He’s still very advanced academically (eg taking calculus in 9th grade). Red shirting him would have just been a waste of a year. That he’s small isn’t an issue, but I am wondering about puberty.


I’m sorry your description is obnoxious. Hopefully he has some humility unlike you.