What is the obsession on DCUM with university rankings and were your kid goes to school?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We sent our kids to public schools in NOVA then to UVA. Saved thousands and thousands of dollars in tuition while the kids got a great education and attended a college that was plenty good enough for us to hold our heads up high at cocktail parties and other DMV social events - and to retire much earlier than the typical DCUM poster.

But hey, continue to argue about whether Northeastern or Emory or Tulane or etc is prestigious and worth the money. Y’all are crazy.

1. You sound bitter
2. Emory is a better school than UVA
3. This board hates Northeastern and Tulane and would never compare than to UVA let alone Emory.
4. UVA parents are always trying to validate their choice by bringing better schools down.

Look, I’m not here to argue whether Emory or Tulane or Northeastern is “better” or worse than UVA. This much is clear, though: none of them is so much better that they are worth twice the price and then some.

My kid got scholarshp, so luckily they could get the F outta VA, and explore other parts of the country (Boston) in earlier age.
It was great choice.

We’re not talking about scholarship kids. Those kids don’t pay ridiculous tuition. But why not name the school that your kid went to instead of UVA? It would be helpful to the discussion.

Northeatsern.
My kid was born and raised in Fairfax/Chantilly whole life.
Kid wanted to go out and explore in college years.
Luckily total price came out to be just little more than UVA, and was a great fit.

Also got into other schools ranked higher like #28 #36 at the time and Northeatern was #47 something like that at the time, but rankingn was not important.

Did your kid actually apply and get into UVA?

Yes Northeastern was harder admit. You don't know this?
UVA and VT were at the bottom of the list.

+1

UVA is not everyone's goal - but the UVA or bust parents do not understand this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We sent our kids to public schools in NOVA then to UVA. Saved thousands and thousands of dollars in tuition while the kids got a great education and attended a college that was plenty good enough for us to hold our heads up high at cocktail parties and other DMV social events - and to retire much earlier than the typical DCUM poster.

But hey, continue to argue about whether Northeastern or Emory or Tulane or etc is prestigious and worth the money. Y’all are crazy.

1. You sound bitter
2. Emory is a better school than UVA
3. This board hates Northeastern and Tulane and would never compare than to UVA let alone Emory.
4. UVA parents are always trying to validate their choice by bringing better schools down.

Look, I’m not here to argue whether Emory or Tulane or Northeastern is “better” or worse than UVA. This much is clear, though: none of them is so much better that they are worth twice the price and then some.

My kid got scholarshp, so luckily they could get the F outta VA, and explore other parts of the country (Boston) in earlier age.
It was great choice.

We’re not talking about scholarship kids. Those kids don’t pay ridiculous tuition. But why not name the school that your kid went to instead of UVA? It would be helpful to the discussion.

Northeatsern.
My kid was born and raised in Fairfax/Chantilly whole life.
Kid wanted to go out and explore in college years.
Luckily total price came out to be just little more than UVA, and was a great fit.

Also got into other schools ranked higher like #28 #36 at the time and Northeatern was #47 something like that at the time, but rankingn was not important.

Did your kid actually apply and get into UVA?

Yes Northeastern was harder admit. You don't know this?
UVA and VT were at the bottom of the list.

+1

UVA is not everyone's goal - but the UVA or bust parents do not understand this.

Queue the Northeastern Hater. In 3,2,1.....

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I must be new here.

Why do so many of you care where our DC or other kids choose to go to college? I just don't understand all the arguments Public vs Private, blah blah blah. Top 10-50 colleges or bust? (You are a fool for spending $50K a year on private school) when my kids public school was free (and our public kid was accepted to the same university as your private school kid}.

What exactly is the point of these posts? Why does it matter? I hope that we all make decisions that we believe are best for our kids.

Because this forum is full of grubby and lowly middle class strivers. They have nothing else but obsessively living through the "prestige" of where their kids go to college. They are convinced a top 25 college is THE golden ticket to their family "making it" and climbing the social status ladder. It's laughably absurd, of course. The richest families I know don't give a flying f*** about any of this. Their kids go wherever they're a fit, be it a large public "party school" or a small and obscure private liberal arts college or Duke or an Ivy. It also demonstrates the parents obsessed with this nonsense were themselves educated at non-selective colleges, as parents with prestige bachelor's degrees know it isn't some golden ticket. Only low-information striver wannabes are convinced this matters.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We sent our kids to public schools in NOVA then to UVA. Saved thousands and thousands of dollars in tuition while the kids got a great education and attended a college that was plenty good enough for us to hold our heads up high at cocktail parties and other DMV social events - and to retire much earlier than the typical DCUM poster.

But hey, continue to argue about whether Northeastern or Emory or Tulane or etc is prestigious and worth the money. Y’all are crazy.

1. You sound bitter
2. Emory is a better school than UVA
3. This board hates Northeastern and Tulane and would never compare than to UVA let alone Emory.
4. UVA parents are always trying to validate their choice by bringing better schools down.

Look, I’m not here to argue whether Emory or Tulane or Northeastern is “better” or worse than UVA. This much is clear, though: none of them is so much better that they are worth twice the price and then some.

Do you realize that you are talking to (some) people who live in houses with 5 bathrooms for 4 people? Who spend more on cars than college?
Who have a second home because it's more convenient than booking a hotel? Some people have enough money that they don't need to be efficient with it. I thank them for helping keep tuition relatively lower for others.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We sent our kids to public schools in NOVA then to UVA. Saved thousands and thousands of dollars in tuition while the kids got a great education and attended a college that was plenty good enough for us to hold our heads up high at cocktail parties and other DMV social events - and to retire much earlier than the typical DCUM poster.

But hey, continue to argue about whether Northeastern or Emory or Tulane or etc is prestigious and worth the money. Y’all are crazy.

Well, I would have done that too but UVA only takes the top 5% of the class and in some high schools, that’s still a 4.5. It wasn’t an option for my kid. So maybe be grateful your kids got into UVA and gave you the freedom you have now.

Wrong.

https://admission.virginia.edu/admission/statistics

86%
of enrolling students had reported rank in top tenth of class


(not all applicants reported rank)

-----

Another source claims
"An impressive 89.6% of the University of Virginia’s class of 2025 graduated in the top 10% of their high school class"

This includes hooked kids. Athletes, diversity, first gen.
Look, if my white 4.2 1490 kid got into UVA, he would have gone. It is not an option for about 90% of Virginia high schoolers.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I must be new here.

Why do so many of you care where our DC or other kids choose to go to college? I just don't understand all the arguments Public vs Private, blah blah blah. Top 10-50 colleges or bust? (You are a fool for spending $50K a year on private school) when my kids public school was free (and our public kid was accepted to the same university as your private school kid}.

What exactly is the point of these posts? Why does it matter? I hope that we all make decisions that we believe are best for our kids.

Because this forum is full of grubby and lowly middle class strivers. They have nothing else but obsessively living through the "prestige" of where their kids go to college. They are convinced a top 25 college is THE golden ticket to their family "making it" and climbing the social status ladder. It's laughably absurd, of course. The richest families I know don't give a flying f*** about any of this. Their kids go wherever they're a fit, be it a large public "party school" or a small and obscure private liberal arts college or Duke or an Ivy. It also demonstrates the parents obsessed with this nonsense were themselves educated at non-selective colleges, as parents with prestige bachelor's degrees know it isn't some golden ticket. Only low-information striver wannabes are convinced this matters.

+1

Well said. Some people are terribly misinformed, to boot.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We sent our kids to public schools in NOVA then to UVA. Saved thousands and thousands of dollars in tuition while the kids got a great education and attended a college that was plenty good enough for us to hold our heads up high at cocktail parties and other DMV social events - and to retire much earlier than the typical DCUM poster.

But hey, continue to argue about whether Northeastern or Emory or Tulane or etc is prestigious and worth the money. Y’all are crazy.

Well, I would have done that too but UVA only takes the top 5% of the class and in some high schools, that’s still a 4.5. It wasn’t an option for my kid. So maybe be grateful your kids got into UVA and gave you the freedom you have now.

Wrong.

https://admission.virginia.edu/admission/statistics

86%
of enrolling students had reported rank in top tenth of class


(not all applicants reported rank)

-----

Another source claims
"An impressive 89.6% of the University of Virginia’s class of 2025 graduated in the top 10% of their high school class"

This includes hooked kids. Athletes, diversity, first gen.
Look, if my white 4.2 1490 kid got into UVA, he would have gone. It is not an option for about 90% of Virginia high schoolers.

Not everyone feels this way.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We sent our kids to public schools in NOVA then to UVA. Saved thousands and thousands of dollars in tuition while the kids got a great education and attended a college that was plenty good enough for us to hold our heads up high at cocktail parties and other DMV social events - and to retire much earlier than the typical DCUM poster.

But hey, continue to argue about whether Northeastern or Emory or Tulane or etc is prestigious and worth the money. Y’all are crazy.

1. You sound bitter
2. Emory is a better school than UVA
3. This board hates Northeastern and Tulane and would never compare than to UVA let alone Emory.
4. UVA parents are always trying to validate their choice by bringing better schools down.

Look, I’m not here to argue whether Emory or Tulane or Northeastern is “better” or worse than UVA. This much is clear, though: none of them is so much better that they are worth twice the price and then some.

My kid got scholarshp, so luckily they could get the F outta VA, and explore other parts of the country (Boston) in earlier age.
It was great choice.

We’re not talking about scholarship kids. Those kids don’t pay ridiculous tuition. But why not name the school that your kid went to instead of UVA? It would be helpful to the discussion.

Northeatsern.
My kid was born and raised in Fairfax/Chantilly whole life.
Kid wanted to go out and explore in college years.
Luckily total price came out to be just little more than UVA, and was a great fit.

Also got into other schools ranked higher like #28 #36 at the time and Northeatern was #47 something like that at the time, but rankingn was not important.

Did your kid actually apply and get into UVA?

Yes Northeastern was harder admit. You don't know this?
UVA and VT were at the bottom of the list.

+1

UVA is not everyone's goal - but the UVA or bust parents do not understand this.

We are not a UVA family but UVA is a tremendous value and there is merit to shooting for UVA instead of wasting all the time, money, and stress on some further away Ivy League college (or whatever) because it's ranked higher and you think it will impress strangers. For 99% of applicants, the Ivy obsession was a complete waste of time, money and stress. Why bother? UVA families seem far happier and carefree and astute after it all shakes out. Even if you win the admissions lottery (and you probably won't) and your kid gets into Penn, is the education and experience they receive worth it over UVA? It's really not.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I must be new here.

Why do so many of you care where our DC or other kids choose to go to college? I just don't understand all the arguments Public vs Private, blah blah blah. Top 10-50 colleges or bust? (You are a fool for spending $50K a year on private school) when my kids public school was free (and our public kid was accepted to the same university as your private school kid}.

What exactly is the point of these posts? Why does it matter? I hope that we all make decisions that we believe are best for our kids.

I went to an elite college. Lots of amazing peers and many amazing professors. A few terrible profs and bad required classes in and out of major. About 1/4 of my classes were a total waste for one reason or another. Did I get a $200K education? Absolutely not. Did I get a $200K degree and make connections and get a job that paid that back and a lot more? Yes.

And I don't mean hobnobbing at country clubs. I hated the concept of networking and "golf" and "tennis"; I was committed to earning my way on my own efforts, and wanted to believe the world was fair. I got some bad grades because I refused to cheat or accept giveaways from profs like many classmates did.

But just casually knowing someone who knew someone who was hiring for upwardly mobile roles, set my life trajectory.

I got an amazing job for a new grad, from career fair in college because a friend's older friend worked there and invited me to apply, even after I applied my filter of avoiding "evil" companies.
I got an interview at a rising star company because a friend from HS and college was visiting and told me their friend from college had a friend from college who was hiring, and gave me the hiring manager's info.
A classmate friend married a classmate whose family member was someone you know from the news, and gave me that person's cell phone number to apply for a job at their young growing company.

That's why elite colleges are important to people. Even people who don't know those details, who only know "PYSH is elite" are indirectly getting their impression from facts like what I mentioned above. People who go to those schools arecon average more successful than people who don't, all else equal.

Are things different now? Can you rise above your station thanks to the Internet and Twitter and whatever to find opportunities and compete in your merit? Maybe.

But if you stop accepting the legacy kids and rich 1%s, these type of opportunities are diminished. Is your first gen roommate’s dad going to get you a summer job? If the rich and powerful are no longer at the school, the chance for connections and social mobility are also minimized.

You may be right...but none of those practices have been stopped anywhere as of today at the top national universities (MIT being the exception with no legacy preference). The top 1% and more importantly the top 0.1% are way, way, way over-represented at the top schools. Actually, even MIT with no legacy bump still ranks in the top 10 for wealthiest student bodies.

It will always be that way. When universities cost $80K+/year, only those with full/close to full FA and those that can easily be full pay will be represented. Most people smartly say, I'm not going into $200K+ debt for a degree, when I can attend a state school/private with merit for $40K/year.

The T20 schools have always been largely wealthy student bodies even 30-40 years ago.

[Anonymous]

I think ultimately a lot of it is insecurity. The most obsessed parents have spent their entire parenting years aiming for their kids to have the BEST of everything. Now they finally come up against something where that is completely out of their control. They want guarantees for their kids' future and they think a prestigious college and STEM degree are the way to get that. But they can't just write a check and make it happen.

We didn't get into that obsession because I'm realistic enough to know that my kids aren't in that level academically (strong students but not the top 5-10% of their HS). And, that's all for the best because we can't afford those schools anyway. So one goes to Virginia Tech (not engineering) and one goes to a mid-range LAC where the price is similar to VT. Both are getting plenty of opportunities and ultimately it's up to them what they do with those. Same as it was for DH and I at the not-top-tier public universities we went to. I firmly believe that it comes down to what you do at college not the specific name on the diploma (with the caveat that yes, brand matters when it comes to careers like IB and elite consulting firms, neither of which are target careers for my kids).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I must be new here.

Why do so many of you care where our DC or other kids choose to go to college? I just don't understand all the arguments Public vs Private, blah blah blah. Top 10-50 colleges or bust? (You are a fool for spending $50K a year on private school) when my kids public school was free (and our public kid was accepted to the same university as your private school kid}.

What exactly is the point of these posts? Why does it matter? I hope that we all make decisions that we believe are best for our kids.

Because this forum is full of grubby and lowly middle class strivers. They have nothing else but obsessively living through the "prestige" of where their kids go to college. They are convinced a top 25 college is THE golden ticket to their family "making it" and climbing the social status ladder. It's laughably absurd, of course. The richest families I know don't give a flying f*** about any of this. Their kids go wherever they're a fit, be it a large public "party school" or a small and obscure private liberal arts college or Duke or an Ivy. It also demonstrates the parents obsessed with this nonsense were themselves educated at non-selective colleges, as parents with prestige bachelor's degrees know it isn't some golden ticket. Only low-information striver wannabes are convinced this matters.

Well, I'm a world-renowned Ph.D. in my field, but I must confess I'm obsessed with my kids' colleges. I can't help it. It is fascinating

[Anonymous]

I’m the UVA poster and I’m being misunderstood. I’m not saying UVA is the be all and end all. Not at all. What I’m really saying is that NO college is the be all and end all when you have to compromise your financial future to make it happen.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I must be new here.

Why do so many of you care where our DC or other kids choose to go to college? I just don't understand all the arguments Public vs Private, blah blah blah. Top 10-50 colleges or bust? (You are a fool for spending $50K a year on private school) when my kids public school was free (and our public kid was accepted to the same university as your private school kid}.

What exactly is the point of these posts? Why does it matter? I hope that we all make decisions that we believe are best for our kids.

Because this forum is full of grubby and lowly middle class strivers. They have nothing else but obsessively living through the "prestige" of where their kids go to college. They are convinced a top 25 college is THE golden ticket to their family "making it" and climbing the social status ladder. It's laughably absurd, of course. The richest families I know don't give a flying f*** about any of this. Their kids go wherever they're a fit, be it a large public "party school" or a small and obscure private liberal arts college or Duke or an Ivy. It also demonstrates the parents obsessed with this nonsense were themselves educated at non-selective colleges, as parents with prestige bachelor's degrees know it isn't some golden ticket. Only low-information striver wannabes are convinced this matters.

Well, I'm a world-renowned Ph.D. in my field, but I must confess I'm obsessed with my kids' colleges. I can't help it. It is fascinating

+1 I have zero interest in the prestige/ranking aspect but have found the whole college search process really interesting. I think it's really boring to fixate on the highly-ranked schools everyone's heard of. What I love is discovering the interesting things at schools I've never heard of!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I must be new here.

Why do so many of you care where our DC or other kids choose to go to college? I just don't understand all the arguments Public vs Private, blah blah blah. Top 10-50 colleges or bust? (You are a fool for spending $50K a year on private school) when my kids public school was free (and our public kid was accepted to the same university as your private school kid}.

What exactly is the point of these posts? Why does it matter? I hope that we all make decisions that we believe are best for our kids.

Because this forum is full of grubby and lowly middle class strivers. They have nothing else but obsessively living through the "prestige" of where their kids go to college. They are convinced a top 25 college is THE golden ticket to their family "making it" and climbing the social status ladder. It's laughably absurd, of course. The richest families I know don't give a flying f*** about any of this. Their kids go wherever they're a fit, be it a large public "party school" or a small and obscure private liberal arts college or Duke or an Ivy. It also demonstrates the parents obsessed with this nonsense were themselves educated at non-selective colleges, as parents with prestige bachelor's degrees know it isn't some golden ticket. Only low-information striver wannabes are convinced this matters.

https://www.insider.com/college-admissions-scandal-full-list-people-sentenced-2019-9#parent-homayoun-zadeh-was-sentenced-to-6-weeks-in-prison-33

Looks to me it's the rich people who are obssed with prestige schools, and going the furthest distance.
They are mostly White, too.

[Anonymous]

Agree to the above. My kid is going to a top 100 school, not elite any means. But I love school, love learning about colleges, big or small, good or not so good, etc. I find it all interesting and like to know where kids are going just to hear about other places