The term ‘push present’

[Anonymous]

It is some dowry she earns, like a breeding cow. Double points if she pushes out a boy.

(Gag me)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If it's traditional in your culture, then by all means, carry on. If it's not traditional, as in most of the US, asking for a push present is tacky and greedy. It's like a payment for having a baby. So transactional and gross.

I think it’s reasonably traditional in the US to buy a durable gift like jewelry to commemorate the birth of a child.

The baby IS the gift.

The ultimate gift, to both parents.

That is how I see it anyway.

[Anonymous]

Lol. I hope you guys also don’t expect presents for graduations, birthdays, or anniversaries.

I’ve never heard so much negativity about getting or giving a gift.

The term is weird and I wouldn’t use it. But the gift seems totally benign. You guys are oddly negative and worried about what other people do.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Lol. I hope you guys also don’t expect presents for graduations, birthdays, or anniversaries.

I’ve never heard so much negativity about getting or giving a gift.

The term is weird and I wouldn’t use it. But the gift seems totally benign. You guys are oddly negative and worried about what other people do.

Most people are referring to the word- just like you are.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Lol. I hope you guys also don’t expect presents for graduations, birthdays, or anniversaries.

I’ve never heard so much negativity about getting or giving a gift.

The term is weird and I wouldn’t use it. But the gift seems totally benign. You guys are oddly negative and worried about what other people do.

Most people are referring to the word- just like you are.

Clearly not, “like a dowry” “the baby is the present!” (Which is ironic since this is the sort of vapid saccharine thing an instagram influencer would say too) “gold digger”

I mean seriously. Does it really matter to you if a present is given at a birthday or an anniversary or to recognize a child birth? Sheesh.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Babymoons, push presents, weddings that go on for days. All about social media and the incredible narcissism of our society

Whaaat? Some people just want to go on a vacation before sleepless nights start? We weren’t afforded that luxury unfortunately, but would have appreciated the option.

I think the consensus in here is the present isn’t so bad but the name is.

And “weddings that go on for days”… you mean Indian weddings? Or what here? I hope we didn’t have you at our wedding - hardly any of it made it to social media, but I’d hate to find out we had a bitter Betty in the group who participated in fun activities before and after the day of the wedding. Sheesh.

You seem bitter, judgy, and unhappy. Is your cat giving you the silent treatment again?

I’m pretty sure they weren’t talking about cultural practices from other countries. No need to be offended.

[Anonymous]

It's gross and the whole phenomenon is gross.

The best present a DH can give his wife is to be a hands-on dad, in the early days and beyond. Take initiative, do the work, stay up, and support mom.

But I suppose the women using these terms and asking for a "push present" are the same women who think that a big ring will make them happy. It's just so odd and misplaced.

[Anonymous]

You guys are assuming that women are forcing men to buy these gifts.

My Dh picked out a diamond pendant all on his own and gave it to me in the hospital. He gave it after all the excitement had died down and it was just the 3 of us cuddling the baby.

I guess I should have given it back because the baby is the gift and show how ungrateful I was.

[Anonymous]

These threads are so, so tired. People will say they hate the name, but they really hate the practice too. Even though, as someone pointed out, women have received gifts to comemorate the births of their children for years and years and years.

I have received beautiful jewelry at my college and law school graduations, milestone birthdays, our engagement, and our wedding. I also purchased a few nice pieces for myself for major life events. I like jewelry. And I like the lovely pieces commemorating the births of my kids. I don’t see how it’s any different.

[Anonymous]

I see no issue commemorating one of the most important days of your life with a nice piece of jewelry and calling it a push present. Hey, I’ve got an engagement ring and a husband so I don’t think I have room to judge someone who has a baby and a pretty necklace.

And the petty and ridiculous class comments are so over the top. Give it a rest and stop comparing yourself to other people in an effort to feel less miserable.

[Anonymous]

calling it a 'push present' makes it seem like a 'thing'. It's like if i suddenly invented 'colonsocopy cartier' - it's tacky and striver-y and lame to try to create 'branding' that standardizes the expectation of material gifting.

[Anonymous]

I also dislike the term “bump”. When did that start and when will it go away?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I for some reason find this term to be so tacky and cheesy. Am I alone?

No you are not alone - it's a more recent trashy term that only low-class bumpkins use.

It's grotesque and only people who do gender reveals and name their daughter Raygun do this. Ignore.

Haaaaa raygun best name ever

Let’s make it popular for all those trying to be unique.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:calling it a 'push present' makes it seem like a 'thing'. It's like if i suddenly invented 'colonsocopy cartier' - it's tacky and striver-y and lame to try to create 'branding' that standardizes the expectation of material gifting.

I assume you have the same concerns about “engagement ring” and “birthday present”. Basically the same as colonoscopy Cartier. Though to be honest as a man approaching this age, a cartier watch with every colonoscopy would be awesome.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:calling it a 'push present' makes it seem like a 'thing'. It's like if i suddenly invented 'colonsocopy cartier' - it's tacky and striver-y and lame to try to create 'branding' that standardizes the expectation of material gifting.

I agree that material gifting is not necessary and shouldn’t feel obligatory in this instance. Also agree that the commercialization of every life event has gotten out of hand likely due, to some extent, to social media.

I do think, though, that having a child would be considered by most to be a life event like a graduation, engagement or anniversary (where jewelry is commonly gifted) than a stand alone medical event.