Mimosas at Birthday Party

[Anonymous]

OP here again. Goodness! The few threads I've started in the past have gotten like, five posts total

FWIW, here is my thinking in regard to alcohol. It is never necessary but can be a festive touch and, yes, make conversation a little easier. I would never allow minors to drink in my home (though I also think important to model responsible behavior with alcohol so their first experience isn't at a high school or college party) and I expect any adult to know their own comfort level and limits.

I do hope parents, as well as kids, will have a good time at parties we host. I totally respect that a bunch of folks may not want alcohol (and have strong views about it generally) but wanted that option available to those who wanted to/were able to enjoy.

Thanks, all. Like I said the last time chiming in, this has all been instructive.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Literally every home or park birthday party that I attend has some sort of booze for the parents. It's what makes 25 screaming elementary school children tolerable. Anyone who gave me attitude for this would be crossed off the list for future parties. Our lifestyles just won't mesh well, so no point in spending time with them.

Oh my god! Like, literally! Like, cross them off. Literally, like oh my god!

Settle down, PP. Maybe have a drink.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here again. Goodness! The few threads I've started in the past have gotten like, five posts total

FWIW, here is my thinking in regard to alcohol. It is never necessary but can be a festive touch and, yes, make conversation a little easier. I would never allow minors to drink in my home (though I also think important to model responsible behavior with alcohol so their first experience isn't at a high school or college party) and I expect any adult to know their own comfort level and limits.

I do hope parents, as well as kids, will have a good time at parties we host. I totally respect that a bunch of folks may not want alcohol (and have strong views about it generally) but wanted that option available to those who wanted to/were able to enjoy.

Thanks, all. Like I said the last time chiming in, this has all been instructive.

Don't worry, OP. People on DCUM LOVE to be passive aggressively judgy about alcohol. It's a little serotonin boost for them. If you really want to get a response, post about having a drink while you're pregnant. It's like stepping on an anthill.

*sips mimosa*

[Anonymous]

Interesting to see this thread. I have teenagers and starting at about middle school, my spouse and I made a point of discussing who was the designated driver in front of our kids on the way to a any all-family gatherings and then one of us doesn't drink. Same if we go out as a family to dinner at a restaurant or say a sporting event where alcohol might be served. Because we don't want our kids having the impression it's okay to have a couple drinks and then gage how you feel and drive anyway. I do believe most (not all) adults can do this pretty well. But teens should not be doing this. They don't have the experience or judgment and it should be black and white. Had a drink? Do not drive. Ever. Your friend has been drinking but says they are fine? Do not get in the car with them.

We seem to be in the minority on this and lots of people keep on drinking and driving and modeling that for their kids while probably saying something completely different to them.

My point is drink up at the party now while they are in kindergarten. Guilt free!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would appreciate mimosas at a kid's party! Some people are judgmental about alcohol being anywhere in the vicinity of kids though.

I think it's more judgement about serving alcohol to people who you know are driving away from your home with children in their car.

oh bull. you tryiing to tell me these people don't have a beer when they go out to dinner and then ... DRIVE HOME!

I think the differences are a couple:

At an all-class birthday party you don't know the drinking habits of the adults. Someone previously said I assume all adults drink responsibly and don't drive drunk. Why would you ever assume that? Um, clearly people drive impaired all the time. So no, I wouldn't feel comfortable serving booze over a multi-hour party to adults I don't even know and then having them drive home with their kids.

If people drink at dinner and then drive home, that is fully their choice. In this scenario, you are serving them the alcohol. No you wouldn't be held liable in most states if anything happened, but it's not great either.

I didn’t say I assume all adults drink responsibly and don’t drive drunk. I said if you’re at MY home, I expect you to drink responsibly no matter who is present.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm in NYC and I don't remember the last kids party I went to that didn't serve alcohol for the parents.

Should add that driving is not really a concern in this situation so perhaps that's the reason?

[Anonymous]

I went to a 5yo birthday party once where mimosas were served and the mom of the birthday girl got so drunk she vomited and was incredibly embarrassing (dancing around, yelping like a sorority girl, etc). Her husband kept trying to put her upstairs to bed, but she kept showing up bottle in hand. The rest of the adults kept trying to keep the kids occupied and away from it all. It was awful.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would appreciate mimosas at a kid's party! Some people are judgmental about alcohol being anywhere in the vicinity of kids though.

I think it's more judgement about serving alcohol to people who you know are driving away from your home with children in their car.

oh bull. you tryiing to tell me these people don't have a beer when they go out to dinner and then ... DRIVE HOME!

I think the differences are a couple:

At an all-class birthday party you don't know the drinking habits of the adults. Someone previously said I assume all adults drink responsibly and don't drive drunk. Why would you ever assume that? Um, clearly people drive impaired all the time. So no, I wouldn't feel comfortable serving booze over a multi-hour party to adults I don't even know and then having them drive home with their kids.

If people drink at dinner and then drive home, that is fully their choice. In this scenario, you are serving them the alcohol. No you wouldn't be held liable in most states if anything happened, but it's not great either.

I didn’t say I assume all adults drink responsibly and don’t drive drunk. I said if you’re at MY home, I expect you to drink responsibly no matter who is present.

Is this conveyed to everyone coming in? How does that go? At al all-class birthday party for 5 year olds do they sign something at the door?

[Anonymous]

I wouldn't serve alcohol at a kid party (too afraid of being judged, I guess), but I would be happy to attend one!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I went to a 5yo birthday party once where mimosas were served and the mom of the birthday girl got so drunk she vomited and was incredibly embarrassing (dancing around, yelping like a sorority girl, etc). Her husband kept trying to put her upstairs to bed, but she kept showing up bottle in hand. The rest of the adults kept trying to keep the kids occupied and away from it all. It was awful.

This is so sad (and horrible)--obviously someone with a real problem.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would appreciate mimosas at a kid's party! Some people are judgmental about alcohol being anywhere in the vicinity of kids though.

I think it's more judgement about serving alcohol to people who you know are driving away from your home with children in their car.

oh bull. you tryiing to tell me these people don't have a beer when they go out to dinner and then ... DRIVE HOME!

I think the differences are a couple:

At an all-class birthday party you don't know the drinking habits of the adults. Someone previously said I assume all adults drink responsibly and don't drive drunk. Why would you ever assume that? Um, clearly people drive impaired all the time. So no, I wouldn't feel comfortable serving booze over a multi-hour party to adults I don't even know and then having them drive home with their kids.

If people drink at dinner and then drive home, that is fully their choice. In this scenario, you are serving them the alcohol. No you wouldn't be held liable in most states if anything happened, but it's not great either.

I didn’t say I assume all adults drink responsibly and don’t drive drunk. I said if you’re at MY home, I expect you to drink responsibly no matter who is present.

Is this conveyed to everyone coming in? How does that go? At al all-class birthday party for 5 year olds do they sign something at the door?

If you read my post, I said I wouldn’t serve alcohol at an all-class party. And no, I don’t lecture my guests when they arrive. They are free to grab a beer or glass of wine (or more likely we are serving them). If someone seemed impaired, I would pull them aside if they had driven if they didn’t have a spouse to drive them home. But this hasn’t happened in my home. Does this happen to you? I’m curious about this line of questioning. I’ve never been lectured at someone’s home.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would appreciate mimosas at a kid's party! Some people are judgmental about alcohol being anywhere in the vicinity of kids though.

I think it's more judgement about serving alcohol to people who you know are driving away from your home with children in their car.

oh bull. you tryiing to tell me these people don't have a beer when they go out to dinner and then ... DRIVE HOME!

I think the differences are a couple:

At an all-class birthday party you don't know the drinking habits of the adults. Someone previously said I assume all adults drink responsibly and don't drive drunk. Why would you ever assume that? Um, clearly people drive impaired all the time. So no, I wouldn't feel comfortable serving booze over a multi-hour party to adults I don't even know and then having them drive home with their kids.

If people drink at dinner and then drive home, that is fully their choice. In this scenario, you are serving them the alcohol. No you wouldn't be held liable in most states if anything happened, but it's not great either.

Genuine question; do you serve alcohol at evening parties? We've hosted some fundraisers and the like where we don't know everyone but have served alcohol.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Literally every home or park birthday party that I attend has some sort of booze for the parents. It's what makes 25 screaming elementary school children tolerable. Anyone who gave me attitude for this would be crossed off the list for future parties. Our lifestyles just won't mesh well, so no point in spending time with them.

How do you fit that many people in your trailer?

Do you mean my NYC coop across the street from the park? Darling, it’s the UC that drinks the most.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Literally every home or park birthday party that I attend has some sort of booze for the parents. It's what makes 25 screaming elementary school children tolerable. Anyone who gave me attitude for this would be crossed off the list for future parties. Our lifestyles just won't mesh well, so no point in spending time with them.

How do you fit that many people in your trailer?

Do you mean my NYC coop across the street from the park? Darling, it’s the UC that drinks the most.

Esp mimosas at a kids party. Seems to positively correlate with wealth.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would appreciate mimosas at a kid's party! Some people are judgmental about alcohol being anywhere in the vicinity of kids though.

I think it's more judgement about serving alcohol to people who you know are driving away from your home with children in their car.

oh bull. you tryiing to tell me these people don't have a beer when they go out to dinner and then ... DRIVE HOME!

I think the differences are a couple:

At an all-class birthday party you don't know the drinking habits of the adults. Someone previously said I assume all adults drink responsibly and don't drive drunk. Why would you ever assume that? Um, clearly people drive impaired all the time. So no, I wouldn't feel comfortable serving booze over a multi-hour party to adults I don't even know and then having them drive home with their kids.

If people drink at dinner and then drive home, that is fully their choice. In this scenario, you are serving them the alcohol. No you wouldn't be held liable in most states if anything happened, but it's not great either.

Genuine question; do you serve alcohol at evening parties? We've hosted some fundraisers and the like where we don't know everyone but have served alcohol.

Yes I do. I don't have any kind of evening adult parties where I don't know the people invited. Probably I would serve it but the thought would cross my mind it could be problematic. I think it's much more expected at an adult social gathering though and at a morning kids birthday party not expected and easy to skip.