Not on Facebook

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:They work in the tech industry.

This. Or they have a close friend or family member who does. If you actually knew how Facebook worked, you wouldn't be on there either. Consider: Facebook lost $10 billion dollars in ONE QUARTER in 2022 because Apple started asking iPhone users if they want to allow apps to track them. When asked, users largely say no, which eliminates a major, profitable revenue stream for Facebook.

Now ask yourself what Facebook does that you don't get asked about. Or ask yourself how Facebook is dealing with that loss of revenue. Do you think Zuckerberg was like "Oh, okay -- I guess people don't like being tracked that way. We'll just make less money and respect their privacy."

Come on. Facebook is trash, y'all should know better.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:They lurk on FB by going on via their spouse’s or parent’s account. My husband does this. Several of my friends do this. I think it’s weird.

+1

[Anonymous]

They are on the Dark Web. They are using @orn sites. A lot. Or they have a stash of @orn on their hard drives, which they don't want found.

FB owns Instagram. If FB is trash, what is Insta?

Are posting videos on TikTok better? What about a YouTube channel that spews nothing but hate?

I am 53. I use FB to stay in touch with friends and family who live in another city. They enjoy seeing me happy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They lurk on FB by going on via their spouse’s or parent’s account. My husband does this. Several of my friends do this. I think it’s weird.

Why do you let him use your account then?

Also, I’m not on FB and I don’t do this even though my DH has an account. Is it really that hard to imagine that someone just doesn’t want to be on FB?

If I know people IRL who do this, then why dispute it? It’s a fact.

Consider that you might be the outlier, pp.

I guess I don’t even understand what they are doing on FB with someone else’s account? Just looking at stuff? Or are they like stalking people? And if the latter, how do they do that with a spouse’s or parent’s account— my parents have FB accounts but I can’t imagine they are connected to people I’d want to try and find out about? What is the point of using someone else’s FB account?

They do it so people can’t find them on FB.

And they do it so they can claim to shun social media.

My husband added my FB account to his phone so he can see the kids-related school and sports stuff, but I swear he’s more up to date on where people vacation and who is socializing than I am.

I know tons of women who do the same through their husband’s FB.

And I have a friend who has zero online presence who uses their mom’s FB account to basically stalk people. Her mom is my FB friend, but I know my friend sees my posts through her mom’s account.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They lurk on FB by going on via their spouse’s or parent’s account. My husband does this. Several of my friends do this. I think it’s weird.

Why do you let him use your account then?

Also, I’m not on FB and I don’t do this even though my DH has an account. Is it really that hard to imagine that someone just doesn’t want to be on FB?

If I know people IRL who do this, then why dispute it? It’s a fact.

Consider that you might be the outlier, pp.

I guess I don’t even understand what they are doing on FB with someone else’s account? Just looking at stuff? Or are they like stalking people? And if the latter, how do they do that with a spouse’s or parent’s account— my parents have FB accounts but I can’t imagine they are connected to people I’d want to try and find out about? What is the point of using someone else’s FB account?

They act like they aren’t on FB, but they really are via their spouse’s account. So they can see all the posts. They just don’t post themselves. Or they post their vacation pics but it looks like their partner did it.

My best guess is they don’t want to be searchable under their name and/or they like to brag about not being on FB…but they really are.

So weird.

If you know more than one person who does this, I think there is something weird going on in your social circle. I agree it's deeply weird, but I don't think it's a widespread thing.

I also question if you actually know this or just think you do, because I have a hard time imagining someone telling anyone that they do this unless it's like a one-off thing. Like they aren't on FB but when a friend from college got married, they use their spouse's account to go view the photos or something. Which I would not consider strange. But if people are using a spouse's account regularly, I just can't imagine them sharing that with you. It sounds like obsessive behavior.

I think it’s more widespread than you think. I know women from my kids’ schools, from work, relatives, etc.

I know a lot of teachers who don’t have FB accounts but use their husband’s account. Ditto for people with certain jobs in government.

Do most men you know have FB pages or is it the wife? A lot of men use their wife’s account (sometimes there is a job related reason).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:They are on the Dark Web. They are using @orn sites. A lot. Or they have a stash of @orn on their hard drives, which they don't want found.

FB owns Instagram. If FB is trash, what is Insta?

Are posting videos on TikTok better? What about a YouTube channel that spews nothing but hate?

I am 53. I use FB to stay in touch with friends and family who live in another city. They enjoy seeing me happy.

Lol wut

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:They are on the Dark Web. They are using @orn sites. A lot. Or they have a stash of @orn on their hard drives, which they don't want found.

FB owns Instagram. If FB is trash, what is Insta?

Are posting videos on TikTok better? What about a YouTube channel that spews nothing but hate?

I am 53. I use FB to stay in touch with friends and family who live in another city. They enjoy seeing me happy.

Contrary to this PP's belief, your options are not Facebook or "the Dark Web", porn sites, TikTok, Instagram, and hate-spewing YouTube channels.

As a rule, I avoid all of the above. they all seem bad!

Also, are people aware that you can "stay in touch" with friends and family by simply texting or emailing them? They even have the technology for sending photos through these means of communication. What a world!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They are on the Dark Web. They are using @orn sites. A lot. Or they have a stash of @orn on their hard drives, which they don't want found.

FB owns Instagram. If FB is trash, what is Insta?

Are posting videos on TikTok better? What about a YouTube channel that spews nothing but hate?

I am 53. I use FB to stay in touch with friends and family who live in another city. They enjoy seeing me happy.

Contrary to this PP's belief, your options are not Facebook or "the Dark Web", porn sites, TikTok, Instagram, and hate-spewing YouTube channels.

As a rule, I avoid all of the above. they all seem bad!

Also, are people aware that you can "stay in touch" with friends and family by simply texting or emailing them? They even have the technology for sending photos through these means of communication. What a world!

Imagine this. There are people on the dark web, even though you’re not, and there are people that prefer Facebook to communicate over text.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They have serious jealousy issues and their therapist advised them to get off social media.

This is frankly an insane projection. I'm not on Facebook, have no "jealousy issues", and my therapist and I mostly talk about the challenges I've had in dealing with my aging parents. I am not on Facebook because I did it for a while and found it boring, and then discovered all this questionable stuff Facebook does with my data and decided I'd prefer not to hadn't them information in that way.

You are weird.

So are you saying that every single person that goes to therapy only talks about their ailing parents? There are so many articles about social media and jealousy. How do you not know that’s a thing

[Anonymous]

My father was one of 7 children. My maternal grandfather was one of five children. Do the math. LoL. I have a very large extended family. FB is the easiest way to stay in touch.

[Anonymous]

1) They'r hiding things,
2) They feel like they cannot "keep up"
3) They think they look cool for not indulging

[Anonymous]

Most have moved on to insta (owned by same organization as FB), Snap, or tiktok.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They have serious jealousy issues and their therapist advised them to get off social media.

This is frankly an insane projection. I'm not on Facebook, have no "jealousy issues", and my therapist and I mostly talk about the challenges I've had in dealing with my aging parents. I am not on Facebook because I did it for a while and found it boring, and then discovered all this questionable stuff Facebook does with my data and decided I'd prefer not to hadn't them information in that way.

You are weird.

So are you saying that every single person that goes to therapy only talks about their ailing parents? There are so many articles about social media and jealousy. How do you not know that’s a thing

Just because social media and jealousy is a thing dies not mean that if someone you know is not on Facebook, they have a “jealousy problem” and their therapist ordered them to get off.

You are making the leap from “there is a correlation between social media and jealousy” to “if you aren’t on social media, it must be because you can’t handle the jealousy it incites.” It’s a logical error.

Most people I know with limited or no social media presence are happier and don’t seem to have issues with jealousy. Maybe they are just smarter and so secure in themselves that they don’t worry about missing out by not going on Facebook.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What does this say about a person?

Absolutely nothing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:1) They'r hiding things,
2) They feel like they cannot "keep up"
3) They think they look cool for not indulging

I wish you all understood how insecure and petty these posts make you sound.

It’s like when someone stops drinking alcohol and everyone gossips about it and assumes they had a problem or their spouse made them. But actually it’s just a healthy life choice. Same with Facebook— some people have just realized it’s a waste of time and quit. None of us had Facebook 20 years ago. It’s actually fine to live without it.