15 year old got period and being influenced by the many “I’m sick and can’t function on period”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Daughter 15 bday today! Yeah! And got her period. Exciting and mixed emotions for her. However the message I gave her was that it’s exciting time and life moment but having period shouldn’t change your day to day. You can swim, laugh, cheer all the usual stuff.
She got super upset and said I don’t understand.
I see this so often especially thnx to social media- teens how act like life stops and they are “sick” for a week ewxh Month.
I told her there’s no reason to believe she’ll have any problems and I’m here to help.
But how can I avoid playing into that period nonsense- while still being understanding.
What did most of you do or how did it go when your daughter got period?
Mine is a drama Queen - so that is our baseline.

Yours is not a "drama queen" we know because you called your own 15 year old daughter who you supposedly love that.

This is a you problem you created this not social media.

You don't like social media fine she's 15 cut it off. Fixed it for you now grow up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Daughter 15 bday today! Yeah! And got her period. Exciting and mixed emotions for her. However the message I gave her was that it’s exciting time and life moment but having period shouldn’t change your day to day. You can swim, laugh, cheer all the usual stuff.
She got super upset and said I don’t understand.
I see this so often especially thnx to social media- teens how act like life stops and they are “sick” for a week ewxh Month.
I told her there’s no reason to believe she’ll have any problems and I’m here to help.
But how can I avoid playing into that period nonsense- while still being understanding.
What did most of you do or how did it go when your daughter got period?
Mine is a drama Queen - so that is our baseline.

My kid is 15 and got her period at 13. She tried to use various types of tampons and is still not comfortable. She can not swim when she has her period. Last summer she even tried a pair of swim period bottoms and they lasted less than an hour on a “ light” day. She just isn’t there yet.

[Anonymous]

Its brand new to her, she's going to be dramatic the first time. She will get used to it. I don't know any teens who talk like that about their periods, and I have a 15 year old with lots of female friends.

[Anonymous]

It's new, scary and some get bad cramps. Cut her slack.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wow , you sound awful.

Agree. I hope this is a troll. If not, I'm glad her daughter has access to social media so maybe she can learn some things about managing her discomfort.

It almost certainly is, and from the writing, likely a male troll.

[Anonymous]

Damn, she got her first period on her birthday and that’s how you acted?

My daughter cried and threw up from being upset on the day she got hers for the first time. I told her it sucks and I understand but it gets better and told her we would order any kind of take out she wanted for dinner. She laid in bed on an iPad for two days moping.

It’s two years later and she doesn’t miss a beat. She goes to sports tournaments and out with friends. She has it now and played games all weekend. No issues. But ok the rare occasion she had cramps and wants to stay home from school I let her without hesitation.

Please, give your kid a minute to adjust. I got an IUD as an adult just to stop it. Periods suck so stop with toxic positivity.

[Anonymous]

^ oh yeah and it’s over two years later and she is not comfortable with a tampon. So don’t say swimming isn’t an issue. It’s a huge one.

[Anonymous]

I’ll be another voice saying every period is different. My teenager has painful cramps I didn’t experience at the same age - have some compassion and help your kid learn to manage this, especially when it’s new to them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wait, this is her very first period? If so, maybe give her a minute? My DD got hers at 11 and pretty much rolls with it with no complaints, but she absolutely refuses to try tampons, so when she gets it during the summer, she won’t go to the pool or the beach at all while she has it. That part is frustrating to me because it’s been three years now it sometimes affects the whole family. But whatever, it’s a lot to get used to. Give them time.

I have a 10yo swimmer who got her period last June. Period swimwear is the way to go for the younger set.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Not everyone’s experience with menstruation is the same, OP. In addition to debilitating cramps, I had frequent diarrhea and vomiting during my periods. I was lucky that our school nurse had the same severe reaction and told my parents that I needed to see a doctor because Midol wasn’t cutting it.

Me too, but not until I was about 29. Since then, the first 24-48 hours are a nightmare of cramps, diarrhea and occasionally vomiting. I'm 51 now and it's just letting up now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Daughter 15 bday today! Yeah! And got her period. Exciting and mixed emotions for her. However the message I gave her was that it’s exciting time and life moment but having period shouldn’t change your day to day. You can swim, laugh, cheer all the usual stuff.
She got super upset and said I don’t understand.
I see this so often especially thnx to social media- teens how act like life stops and they are “sick” for a week ewxh Month.
I told her there’s no reason to believe she’ll have any problems and I’m here to help.
But how can I avoid playing into that period nonsense- while still being understanding.
What did most of you do or how did it go when your daughter got period?
Mine is a drama Queen - so that is our baseline.

TikTok is full of these videos. And after your daughter watches one video, TikTok will constantly suggest worse ones. And more of them each day.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I wonder is OP is a troll. DD bday today and she gets her first period. What are the odds? And she has a "I'll tell you what to think" type mom?

To your first point, I got my period on my 11th birthday. It happens.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Not everyone’s experience with menstruation is the same, OP. In addition to debilitating cramps, I had frequent diarrhea and vomiting during my periods. I was lucky that our school nurse had the same severe reaction and told my parents that I needed to see a doctor because Midol wasn’t cutting it.

This! And it changes over our lifetimes, too.

I got cramps so bad, and aspirin and tylenol did NOTHING. Thank god Advil became available shortly thereafter. It's the only thing that worked for me. That and the pill. Those got me through three decades of hating menstruation.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Maybe try kindness. I couldn’t do anything for a good 24 hours when I was her age. I was literally sick and throwing up each month.

+1 I had to lie down (still do to this day) immediately after starting my period. I am nauseous, vomiting, have diarrhea, and debilitating cramps. I also experience blood pressure drops to the point I have nearly fainted. It is scary as hell and there is no way I can do anything on day 1. It improved after childbirth but now that my kids are older it is going back to how it used to be before kids. Don’t minimize her experience and expect everyone to be the same.

[Anonymous]

My lifelong experience with my period is that it absolutely limits my energy levels for at least a couple days a month, and also increases irritability and moodiness for 3-4 days a month. So actually, yes, it impacts my life for about a week every month and pretending it doesn’t dies not help me.

What does help is an acknowledgment, from myself and those closest to me, that this is happening and being realistic about what it means. If I’m irritable due to my period starting in a couple days, let’s not have a serious discussion about our family budget that day— let’s save it for a few days later. And if I’m on day 1 or 2 of my period, I’m going to go to bed earlier and will bow out of certain activities for which I don’t have energy.

Exercise is important, but I am more likely to do yoga or shorter workouts around my period, since I’m tired and experience muscle soreness and abdominal cramps. I take greater care with my diet, too, making sure I’m getting plenty of protein and iron.

Even professional female athletes have started paying attention to how their period impacts training and performance, and will adjust diet and training schedules to accommodate it. This was a story during the women’s World Cup in 2019.

Teaching young women that their period has no impact on them at all, that you can just ignore it, is part of this weird misogyny where women and girls are expected to downplay or ignore normal female experiences like menstruation, pregnancy, post-partum, and menopause, as though they aren’t happening, because men don’t experience them and we’re supposed to act like men. But these things do happen, we should practice care and awareness.