How to more efficiently delegate/outsource tasks I don’t want to be doing & enjoy my kids more

[Anonymous]

Hi OP, I'm in a similar situation, although we just have one child and he is 1. My husband works long hours for work (including consistent weekend work) and I work a 9-530 type job that is demanding, but consistent and no longer hours.

We do daycare (although I typically drop off right at 8 and pick up right before 6, could probably do a nanny to save but we just don't want to), house cleaner every 2 weeks, and I also have someone come 2x a week for 1-2 hours to do chores such as laundry folding, neatening, pick up and put away dishes, clean common areas and straighten toys, run errands like dry cleaning or package drop-off, and light organization. This additional service has been a game changer since it's something beyond what a cleaning service would do, but it's all the *extra* stuff that I don't have the energy to do once I put DS down. I like to have that time to relax myself.

We also do Vegetable and Butcher meal service and Little Spoon (only do LS occasionally, but always have a few meals on hand). I usually try and cook 1-2 meals a week myself and prepare our lunch for the week in the crockpot/instant pot on the weekend.

[Anonymous]

I don’t get it

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Hi OP, I'm in a similar situation, although we just have one child and he is 1. My husband works long hours for work (including consistent weekend work) and I work a 9-530 type job that is demanding, but consistent and no longer hours.

We do daycare (although I typically drop off right at 8 and pick up right before 6, could probably do a nanny to save but we just don't want to), house cleaner every 2 weeks, and I also have someone come 2x a week for 1-2 hours to do chores such as laundry folding, neatening, pick up and put away dishes, clean common areas and straighten toys, run errands like dry cleaning or package drop-off, and light organization. This additional service has been a game changer since it's something beyond what a cleaning service would do, but it's all the *extra* stuff that I don't have the energy to do once I put DS down. I like to have that time to relax myself.

We also do Vegetable and Butcher meal service and Little Spoon (only do LS occasionally, but always have a few meals on hand). I usually try and cook 1-2 meals a week myself and prepare our lunch for the week in the crockpot/instant pot on the weekend.

Where did you find the person who does chores 1-2X per week? I would love that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Hi OP, I'm in a similar situation, although we just have one child and he is 1. My husband works long hours for work (including consistent weekend work) and I work a 9-530 type job that is demanding, but consistent and no longer hours.

We do daycare (although I typically drop off right at 8 and pick up right before 6, could probably do a nanny to save but we just don't want to), house cleaner every 2 weeks, and I also have someone come 2x a week for 1-2 hours to do chores such as laundry folding, neatening, pick up and put away dishes, clean common areas and straighten toys, run errands like dry cleaning or package drop-off, and light organization. This additional service has been a game changer since it's something beyond what a cleaning service would do, but it's all the *extra* stuff that I don't have the energy to do once I put DS down. I like to have that time to relax myself.

We also do Vegetable and Butcher meal service and Little Spoon (only do LS occasionally, but always have a few meals on hand). I usually try and cook 1-2 meals a week myself and prepare our lunch for the week in the crockpot/instant pot on the weekend.

Where did you find the person who does chores 1-2X per week? I would love that.

I used Care.com. I created a job posting, but it didn’t result in much. I searched profiles, and found someone, interviewed her, her references checked out and were awesome. Just buy one month with Care.com. You’ll want to search for something like a personal assistant or house manager, and those are terms that refer to the type of general stuff I have her do. I didn’t know this beforehand. It helps SO MUCH.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Hi OP, I'm in a similar situation, although we just have one child and he is 1. My husband works long hours for work (including consistent weekend work) and I work a 9-530 type job that is demanding, but consistent and no longer hours.

We do daycare (although I typically drop off right at 8 and pick up right before 6, could probably do a nanny to save but we just don't want to), house cleaner every 2 weeks, and I also have someone come 2x a week for 1-2 hours to do chores such as laundry folding, neatening, pick up and put away dishes, clean common areas and straighten toys, run errands like dry cleaning or package drop-off, and light organization. This additional service has been a game changer since it's something beyond what a cleaning service would do, but it's all the *extra* stuff that I don't have the energy to do once I put DS down. I like to have that time to relax myself.

We also do Vegetable and Butcher meal service and Little Spoon (only do LS occasionally, but always have a few meals on hand). I usually try and cook 1-2 meals a week myself and prepare our lunch for the week in the crockpot/instant pot on the weekend.

Where did you find the person who does chores 1-2X per week? I would love that.

I used Care.com. I created a job posting, but it didn’t result in much. I searched profiles, and found someone, interviewed her, her references checked out and were awesome. Just buy one month with Care.com. You’ll want to search for something like a personal assistant or house manager, and those are terms that refer to the type of general stuff I have her do. I didn’t know this beforehand. It helps SO MUCH.

I’ll also add you may want to search under housekeeping/cleaning services if you use Care, because a lot of people will by default have their profiles under cleaning services (there’s not a personal assistant section to the website). Then just find a cleaning person/housekeeper who may have other skills posted.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Hi OP, I'm in a similar situation, although we just have one child and he is 1. My husband works long hours for work (including consistent weekend work) and I work a 9-530 type job that is demanding, but consistent and no longer hours.

We do daycare (although I typically drop off right at 8 and pick up right before 6, could probably do a nanny to save but we just don't want to), house cleaner every 2 weeks, and I also have someone come 2x a week for 1-2 hours to do chores such as laundry folding, neatening, pick up and put away dishes, clean common areas and straighten toys, run errands like dry cleaning or package drop-off, and light organization. This additional service has been a game changer since it's something beyond what a cleaning service would do, but it's all the *extra* stuff that I don't have the energy to do once I put DS down. I like to have that time to relax myself.

We also do Vegetable and Butcher meal service and Little Spoon (only do LS occasionally, but always have a few meals on hand). I usually try and cook 1-2 meals a week myself and prepare our lunch for the week in the crockpot/instant pot on the weekend.

Where did you find the person who does chores 1-2X per week? I would love that.

I used Care.com. I created a job posting, but it didn’t result in much. I searched profiles, and found someone, interviewed her, her references checked out and were awesome. Just buy one month with Care.com. You’ll want to search for something like a personal assistant or house manager, and those are terms that refer to the type of general stuff I have her do. I didn’t know this beforehand. It helps SO MUCH.

I’ll also add you may want to search under housekeeping/cleaning services if you use Care, because a lot of people will by default have their profiles under cleaning services (there’s not a personal assistant section to the website). Then just find a cleaning person/housekeeper who may have other skills posted.

Agreed. I just found someone to do this for 12 hours a week by searching the elder care section of care. Lots of elder care folks do light housekeeping and some meal prep.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Dramatically lower your standards and simplify.

-Sheets and towels get cleaned monthly.
-House gets cleaned once every two weeks? You do no other cleaning (besides post-dinner kitchen/run dishwasher).
-Holiday planning? Do what sounds fun and no more.
-Throw out half your kids toys. And teach them to clean up after themselves.
-Kids get baths 2x per week.

This is disgusting.

No it's not. Although I do wash my own towels weekly. At the risk of sounding crazy, Americans have been conditioned by companies like Proctor & Gamble/Johnson & Johnson to believe that we are dirty and unhealthy unless we use their products and use them often. We also live in a fast fashion, more is better culture.

I think time will help the situation. Mine are now 8 and 15 and although my living situation hasn't really changed, things are just easier after the toddler and preschool stage.

[Anonymous]

You will just have to prioritize what you care about. I care more about my meals than how clean the floor is, for example. Eating the same food every week or salad every night would definitely make me depressed. I therefore devote my energy to good online grocery shopping and finding a good meal delivery. We eat a lot of Asian and always have cooked rice ready in the rice cooker. Sitr-frying some protein and veggies only takes 10 minutes. For the floor, I gave the task of programming the cleaning robot to my DH. He can just set it to clean the main floor before going to bed. That takes 5 minutes. The floor is not perfectly clean but it is good enough for the little effort we put in.

[Anonymous]

Chef, laundry service and a switch to weekly housecleaner.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Dramatically lower your standards and simplify.

-Sheets and towels get cleaned monthly.
-House gets cleaned once every two weeks? You do no other cleaning (besides post-dinner kitchen/run dishwasher).
-Holiday planning? Do what sounds fun and no more.
-Throw out half your kids toys. And teach them to clean up after themselves.
-Kids get baths 2x per week.

This is disgusting.

No it's not. Although I do wash my own towels weekly. At the risk of sounding crazy, Americans have been conditioned by companies like Proctor & Gamble/Johnson & Johnson to believe that we are dirty and unhealthy unless we use their products and use them often. We also live in a fast fashion, more is better culture.

I think time will help the situation. Mine are now 8 and 15 and although my living situation hasn't really changed, things are just easier after the toddler and preschool stage.

Your sheets literally collect dead skin cells that feed dust mites (and don’t you ever do anything besides sleep in them that could warrant washing?). Plus towels get mildew-y after nearly a month! without washing. These are not conspiracies made up by cleaning companies. And I’m not someone who tries to sanitize every inch of my house, but I do think fabrics need to be washed semi-regularly. We will use towels for 3-4 showers (we have 2 sets so will wash them once a week) and sheets are washed every 10-14 days. This seems manageable even with 3 young kids, but if it wasn’t I would definitely get a chore assistant a couple times per week like a PP mentioned or find a housekeeper who does some laundry.