Please stop sending sick kids to school!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I keep my kids home for fever, vomiting, unexplained rash, diarrhea, Covid, Strep, and flu. I am not keeping my kid home for congestion or a runny nose.

If your family gets sick for 7-10 days and misses
work due to a cold or if your whole family ends up on meds for a routine illness, perhaps you should talk to your Dr. about your immune system. That’s not normal.

OP here. I agree. Why are we so sick and everyone just considers it no big deal? We definitely don’t get that sick every time but it happens and it sucks.
Of course my youngest brought home Covid too but that had mild symptoms. We were better in days. I do worry about long Covid if we catch it too often but I’m probably alone in that concern too I think.
I’m not being a martyr as someone suggested. I’m just so tired of being sick.

What I’m trying to say is that my approach is admittedly really different from other parents and perhaps I’m the one who (reluctantly) needs to change.
I’m gathering that keeping my kids home to prevent spreading it is overkill.
It clearly makes me resentful but I guess if I send my sick kids back like everyone else, the resentment will lessen.

We are getting X-rays of my son’s tonsils because he snores and gets sick way too much. I have terrible sinus issues and my husband has some minor lung damage that can cause respiratory issues when he gets sick. Colds often are pretty bad for us. I also have a parent with incurable cancer she lives with so that’s stressful. She’s been to the hospital twice from viruses she caught from us. Though we consider ourselves relatively healthy, it seems these colds are affecting us more than others - I was curious about that. Seems like overall - people just don’t care about getting sick all that much. I really didn’t know that.

Thank you to everyone for your input - it’s helpful.

It’s not that other people don’t care about getting sick. It’s that people have to be practical. In the US, most jobs do not have enough paid leave or even the option to take much unpaid leave. And most people can’t afford to get fired from their jobs and don’t have other options for childcare so they need to send their kids to school majority of the time. It’s also because most people don’t get as sick as you and your family seem to from a routine cold. In my family when we have a cold, we do not feel great—we have congestion and we feel tireder than usual. But we’re not getting awful sinus infections or respiratory issues and we don’t have anyone we come into contact w who gets seriously ill and needs hospitalizations as a result of us having a cold. So I understand how you feel but know that most people both can’t afford to take off time from work every time someone in the family gets a mild illness and also most people don’t get as sick as your family unfortunately does.

I cannot imagine you don't have a job with paid leave. The issue is you'd rather use it for vacation or fun stuff vs. sick kids.

And, if you cared about those who have unpaid leave or minimum wage jobs, you'd keep your kids home sick so you don't infect their kids and cause them to lose time off work.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sorry, we can’t afford to miss more school when the kids are simply congested.

Yes, you can and its called parenting.

In many jobs, no you can't. You will get fired. You can't stay home for every cold.

That is not the school’s problem. Don’t have kids unless you have plans for sick days and backup plans.

That doesn't make any sense. OP isn't saying these kids are violating the school policy and being sent home sick.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My high school students are passing around several different viruses, as far as I can tell. Covid is definitely in the mix, and I know that because two students are now out with it. There also seems to be a remarkably nasty cold hitting several of my classes. I’d say 1/5 of my students are showing some type of symptom, and yet they are in class.

I can’t enforce anything, but I sure wish at the very least they would be wearing a mask when they tell me they have sore throats. I’m just counting the days before I’m out sick at this point. I just hope it’ll be minor because I can’t let my classes fall too far behind.

You say you don't want your class to fall behind, but guess what? All those sick kids are also at school because they don't want to fall behind either.

I can help them if they are home. I can do virtual office hours. I can edit their documents and send feedback. There’s a lot I can do to keep kids from falling behind. I’m doing it right now for the responsible kids staying home. (Yes, they are being responsible.) The ones in class are just keeping this little Petri dish of a classroom active.

If I get sick, I can’t help the ones at home or the ones in class.

I’m a big fan of doing what’s best for the group, not what’s best for me.

Off topic - sorry
Your students are so lucky to have you.
In case you are wondering - your students do appreciate what you do. And so do their parents!!

- Mom of a high schooler who adores his teachers

Thank you! It’s nice to hear kind words. (That’s rare on DCUM!)

I woke up with a sore throat. I’m masking up and going in, hoping this doesn’t get worse. We are so short on subs right now, so if I become miserable or feverish a coworker will have to cover. We are already sharing the load of a vacancy, so I really don’t want to do that to them. Fingers crossed!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sorry, we can’t afford to miss more school when the kids are simply congested.

Yes, you can and its called parenting.

Tell you don't have kids and a job without telling me you don't have kids and a job.

NP, but lots of people have kids and a job and still manage to keep their kids home when they are sick! Some people plan their careers in a way so that they be there for their kids when they need them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I keep my kids home for fever, vomiting, unexplained rash, diarrhea, Covid, Strep, and flu. I am not keeping my kid home for congestion or a runny nose.

If your family gets sick for 7-10 days and misses
work due to a cold or if your whole family ends up on meds for a routine illness, perhaps you should talk to your Dr. about your immune system. That’s not normal.

OP here. I agree. Why are we so sick and everyone just considers it no big deal? We definitely don’t get that sick every time but it happens and it sucks.
Of course my youngest brought home Covid too but that had mild symptoms. We were better in days. I do worry about long Covid if we catch it too often but I’m probably alone in that concern too I think.
I’m not being a martyr as someone suggested. I’m just so tired of being sick.

What I’m trying to say is that my approach is admittedly really different from other parents and perhaps I’m the one who (reluctantly) needs to change.
I’m gathering that keeping my kids home to prevent spreading it is overkill.
It clearly makes me resentful but I guess if I send my sick kids back like everyone else, the resentment will lessen.

We are getting X-rays of my son’s tonsils because he snores and gets sick way too much. I have terrible sinus issues and my husband has some minor lung damage that can cause respiratory issues when he gets sick. Colds often are pretty bad for us. I also have a parent with incurable cancer she lives with so that’s stressful. She’s been to the hospital twice from viruses she caught from us. Though we consider ourselves relatively healthy, it seems these colds are affecting us more than others - I was curious about that. Seems like overall - people just don’t care about getting sick all that much. I really didn’t know that.

Thank you to everyone for your input - it’s helpful.

It’s not that other people don’t care about getting sick. It’s that people have to be practical. In the US, most jobs do not have enough paid leave or even the option to take much unpaid leave. And most people can’t afford to get fired from their jobs and don’t have other options for childcare so they need to send their kids to school majority of the time. It’s also because most people don’t get as sick as you and your family seem to from a routine cold. In my family when we have a cold, we do not feel great—we have congestion and we feel tireder than usual. But we’re not getting awful sinus infections or respiratory issues and we don’t have anyone we come into contact w who gets seriously ill and needs hospitalizations as a result of us having a cold. So I understand how you feel but know that most people both can’t afford to take off time from work every time someone in the family gets a mild illness and also most people don’t get as sick as your family unfortunately does.

I cannot imagine you don't have a job with paid leave. The issue is you'd rather use it for vacation or fun stuff vs. sick kids.

And, if you cared about those who have unpaid leave or minimum wage jobs, you'd keep your kids home sick so you don't infect their kids and cause them to lose time off work.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I keep my kids home for fever, vomiting, unexplained rash, diarrhea, Covid, Strep, and flu. I am not keeping my kid home for congestion or a runny nose.

If your family gets sick for 7-10 days and misses
work due to a cold or if your whole family ends up on meds for a routine illness, perhaps you should talk to your Dr. about your immune system. That’s not normal.

OP here. I agree. Why are we so sick and everyone just considers it no big deal? We definitely don’t get that sick every time but it happens and it sucks.
Of course my youngest brought home Covid too but that had mild symptoms. We were better in days. I do worry about long Covid if we catch it too often but I’m probably alone in that concern too I think.
I’m not being a martyr as someone suggested. I’m just so tired of being sick.

What I’m trying to say is that my approach is admittedly really different from other parents and perhaps I’m the one who (reluctantly) needs to change.
I’m gathering that keeping my kids home to prevent spreading it is overkill.
It clearly makes me resentful but I guess if I send my sick kids back like everyone else, the resentment will lessen.

We are getting X-rays of my son’s tonsils because he snores and gets sick way too much. I have terrible sinus issues and my husband has some minor lung damage that can cause respiratory issues when he gets sick. Colds often are pretty bad for us. I also have a parent with incurable cancer she lives with so that’s stressful. She’s been to the hospital twice from viruses she caught from us. Though we consider ourselves relatively healthy, it seems these colds are affecting us more than others - I was curious about that. Seems like overall - people just don’t care about getting sick all that much. I really didn’t know that.

Thank you to everyone for your input - it’s helpful.

It’s not that other people don’t care about getting sick. It’s that people have to be practical. In the US, most jobs do not have enough paid leave or even the option to take much unpaid leave. And most people can’t afford to get fired from their jobs and don’t have other options for childcare so they need to send their kids to school majority of the time. It’s also because most people don’t get as sick as you and your family seem to from a routine cold. In my family when we have a cold, we do not feel great—we have congestion and we feel tireder than usual. But we’re not getting awful sinus infections or respiratory issues and we don’t have anyone we come into contact w who gets seriously ill and needs hospitalizations as a result of us having a cold. So I understand how you feel but know that most people both can’t afford to take off time from work every time someone in the family gets a mild illness and also most people don’t get as sick as your family unfortunately does.

I cannot imagine you don't have a job with paid leave. The issue is you'd rather use it for vacation or fun stuff vs. sick kids.

And, if you cared about those who have unpaid leave or minimum wage jobs, you'd keep your kids home sick so you don't infect their kids and cause them to lose time off work.

What planet do you live on where you can’t imagine people that don’t have paid leave? For any reason? My DH is a contractor. No paid leave. A good friend is a contractor. No paid leave.

And…how much leave do you imagine people get? If you start a new job, you might get 2-3 weeks. No one is using that because the 3 year old has the sniffles.

And those of y’all telling people to take LWOP…at some places of employment, it isn’t *just* you simply don’t get paid. It could trigger allllll sorts of issues/downstream actions. And no one is dealing with all of that because someone has the sniffles.

[Anonymous]

Post on Care.com or Sitter City for a sitter who’s willing to watch a mildly sick child while you attend your doctor’s appointment. State the child’s symptoms clearly on the job posting. Have your kid mask; have the sitter mask. Pay well. We did this just yesterday.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If every time a kid has a runny nose, they don’t go to school, the classroom would probably be empty all winter.

Rational people understand this.
If you have unlimited time off or are a SAHP and it’s your desire to keep your kid home for every sniffle, have at it. But those of us who send kids to school with no fever/Covid neg and a runny nose are doing nothing wrong.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I keep my kids home for fever, vomiting, unexplained rash, diarrhea, Covid, Strep, and flu. I am not keeping my kid home for congestion or a runny nose.

If your family gets sick for 7-10 days and misses
work due to a cold or if your whole family ends up on meds for a routine illness, perhaps you should talk to your Dr. about your immune system. That’s not normal.

OP here. I agree. Why are we so sick and everyone just considers it no big deal? We definitely don’t get that sick every time but it happens and it sucks.
Of course my youngest brought home Covid too but that had mild symptoms. We were better in days. I do worry about long Covid if we catch it too often but I’m probably alone in that concern too I think.
I’m not being a martyr as someone suggested. I’m just so tired of being sick.

What I’m trying to say is that my approach is admittedly really different from other parents and perhaps I’m the one who (reluctantly) needs to change.
I’m gathering that keeping my kids home to prevent spreading it is overkill.
It clearly makes me resentful but I guess if I send my sick kids back like everyone else, the resentment will lessen.

We are getting X-rays of my son’s tonsils because he snores and gets sick way too much. I have terrible sinus issues and my husband has some minor lung damage that can cause respiratory issues when he gets sick. Colds often are pretty bad for us. I also have a parent with incurable cancer she lives with so that’s stressful. She’s been to the hospital twice from viruses she caught from us. Though we consider ourselves relatively healthy, it seems these colds are affecting us more than others - I was curious about that. Seems like overall - people just don’t care about getting sick all that much. I really didn’t know that.

Thank you to everyone for your input - it’s helpful.

It’s not that other people don’t care about getting sick. It’s that people have to be practical. In the US, most jobs do not have enough paid leave or even the option to take much unpaid leave. And most people can’t afford to get fired from their jobs and don’t have other options for childcare so they need to send their kids to school majority of the time. It’s also because most people don’t get as sick as you and your family seem to from a routine cold. In my family when we have a cold, we do not feel great—we have congestion and we feel tireder than usual. But we’re not getting awful sinus infections or respiratory issues and we don’t have anyone we come into contact w who gets seriously ill and needs hospitalizations as a result of us having a cold. So I understand how you feel but know that most people both can’t afford to take off time from work every time someone in the family gets a mild illness and also most people don’t get as sick as your family unfortunately does.

I cannot imagine you don't have a job with paid leave. The issue is you'd rather use it for vacation or fun stuff vs. sick kids.

And, if you cared about those who have unpaid leave or minimum wage jobs, you'd keep your kids home sick so you don't infect their kids and cause them to lose time off work.

There’s a huge difference between keeping home a sick kid, one who has a fever, one o who is lethargic, positive for Covid or strep, etc. But you don’t take a leave for two weeks when your kid has a runny nose! So many kids do not resolve their congestion or runny noses within a day or two. If that was the case it would be a completely different story.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If every time a kid has a runny nose, they don’t go to school, the classroom would probably be empty all winter.

Rational people understand this.
If you have unlimited time off or are a SAHP and it’s your desire to keep your kid home for every sniffle, have at it. But those of us who send kids to school with no fever/Covid neg and a runny nose are doing nothing wrong.

+1 and most schools are saying this is fine (and has always been fine)

OP is welcome to look for a school with a super strict policy. Don't ruin it for the rest of us.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If every time a kid has a runny nose, they don’t go to school, the classroom would probably be empty all winter.

Rational people understand this.
If you have unlimited time off or are a SAHP and it’s your desire to keep your kid home for every sniffle, have at it. But those of us who send kids to school with no fever/Covid neg and a runny nose are doing nothing wrong.

I’m a stay at home mom and I’m not gonna keep my kid home when they have congestion or runny nose. If they are truly sick absolutely, but as many posters have noted cold symptoms don’t resolve themselves overnight. My child has asthma and allergies and is coughing or having a runny nose most of the fall. I’m sure a stranger may think they’re sick, but that’s not the case.

[Anonymous]

Yea no- If you feel this way homeschool your kid. We can’t afford to have my kid home every time she has a stuffy nose (which is all the time).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Post on Care.com or Sitter City for a sitter who’s willing to watch a mildly sick child while you attend your doctor’s appointment. State the child’s symptoms clearly on the job posting. Have your kid mask; have the sitter mask. Pay well. We did this just yesterday.

Good for you!

[Anonymous]

Daycare/Preschool worker here:

There are two types of colds. Your average run-of-the-mill some mucus and congestion. This type has some runny nose but it is not constant and requires only periodic nose wiping.

The second kind is with the constant thick yellow and green mucus that drips into their mouth. I think everybody here can picture that. This type involves constant monitoring and wiping from staff. Usually when it’s this bad kids don’t feel 100% and because of their constant runny nose can’t participate in all of the activities (nobody wants mucus mixed in with the Play-Doh!).

We don’t expect parents to stay home and keep their kids out with their average cold. That is unrealistic and unsustainable.

But we do expect and will not receive children who require constant wiping. It’s unsanitary and there’s just not enough manpower to keep up with the wiping and consequent hand washing for both the child and staff.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Daycare/Preschool worker here:

There are two types of colds. Your average run-of-the-mill some mucus and congestion. This type has some runny nose but it is not constant and requires only periodic nose wiping.

The second kind is with the constant thick yellow and green mucus that drips into their mouth. I think everybody here can picture that. This type involves constant monitoring and wiping from staff. Usually when it’s this bad kids don’t feel 100% and because of their constant runny nose can’t participate in all of the activities (nobody wants mucus mixed in with the Play-Doh!).

We don’t expect parents to stay home and keep their kids out with their average cold. That is unrealistic and unsustainable.

But we do expect and will not receive children who require constant wiping. It’s unsanitary and there’s just not enough manpower to keep up with the wiping and consequent hand washing for both the child and staff.

+1. My DC's former daycare teacher explained it as "if your child will require extra care throughout the day, it is better for them to stay home". My child has a runny nose often and takes a solid week to fully recover from a cough. If he is happy, playful, running around, I feel fine sending him