'Secret ingredient': was I wrong?

[Anonymous]

Be careful what you wish for….

I knew a couple where the husband, when they got married, brought a book of the “Smith Family Recipes” that the women in his family put together and tried to insist his wife cook ONLY those recipes because they were “tried and true”. Luckily she (rightfully) told him if he wanted to eat his family recipes every night, he was welcome to take over all of the cooking.

[Anonymous]

Both of you need more to do if this is how you are behaving.

[Anonymous]

I think you handled it well.

This secret recipe mentality is outdated because you can Google anything and people are proud to share recipes. But I don’t really think your situation is truly about sharing recipes what about her secretive weird attitude about who is and who is not family and worthy.

You know where I will be googling? Is that Buffalo chicken chimichanga dish mentioned upthread.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'd have said "I'll trade you for Rob's favorite christmas cookies."

+1. You should have traded for a couple of her recipes. Information is power in that family.

[Anonymous]

Life is short, be gracious and kind!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I still long for my Sicilian grandmother's meatballs. She never revealed her secret ingredients.

I will never understand this mentality. Wouldn’t you want your family to cherish your recipes once you’re gone? We don’t have any of my grandmothers legendary recipes but that’s not because grandma didn’t want to share. She always cooked by approximation and no one bothered to take notes till it was too late.

[Anonymous]

Funny that your MIL will share with female blood relatives but not your husband—or has he even thought to ask?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:MIL prides herself on her secret dishes/family recipes and does not share recipes with anyone not in the family--as in ME, who is only a "married-in." OK, whatever. It's not like there aren't 8,000 recipes out there freely available for any dish you could think up, so I don't get the secrecy.

She was at my house last weekend, and I served mashed potatoes. I use a little bit of cream cheese and a very little bit of Lawry's seasoned salt, in addition to the traditional salt/pepper/butter/cream. I also use mainly russet potatoes, but throw in a few Yukon Golds; the result is light and fluffy with a buttery taste and a touch more yellow color. They're good, but they're just mashed potatoes, and there are a million ways to make them that are tasty. So I don't think I make them perfect, or anything.

Anyway, everyone kept complimenting them, and MIL kept asking "what's your secret," which kind of got to me. The same woman who literally will not give me the recipe for her son's favorite Christmas cookies is now asking what my secret is? So I just smiled and shrugged and said, "You're probably just tasting extra butter."

Was I wrong?

I think your MIL's secret recipes are she opens a box, bag or can and dumps it in and then adds some seasoning. But I am a cynic like that........

[Anonymous]

I don't know anyone who keeps their recipes secret, this is so funny. I asked my MIL for her enchilada sauce recipe so I could make them for DH and she sent me a pic of the box, lol

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Life is short, be gracious and kind!

...you talking to MIL? You know, the woman who doesn't share FAMILY recipes with "married-in" members of the...wait for it...family?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Life is short, be gracious and kind!

...you talking to MIL? You know, the woman who doesn't share FAMILY recipes with "married-in" members of the...wait for it...family?

Yes she can be kind too! but one can only control their self of course. “Sticking it to MIL” is not the path to happiness in life. It achieves nothing of value

[Anonymous]

The whole 'secret recipe' thing is overrated. It's just food. It's not that amazing or deep.

Every time someone gets weird/smug about recipes I think 'don't lord over others about it while we play along as a courtesy- it's good but not 'beg you for recipe' good'. I think you gave her a taste of her medicine in a more polite way so no harm/no foul. Doubt she will gain insight though. People who do this seem to have little else going on in life.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Life is short, be gracious and kind!

...you talking to MIL? You know, the woman who doesn't share FAMILY recipes with "married-in" members of the...wait for it...family?

Yes she can be kind too! but one can only control their self of course. “Sticking it to MIL” is not the path to happiness in life. It achieves nothing of value

Enabling MIL to continue to treat her own DIL like an outsider also achieves nothing of value. So there's that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Am I the only one thinking about Phoebe and her grandma's chocolate chip cookies from Neslay Tolouse?

Ha! Nope!! I was about to post the exact same thing and thought I better scroll through all the replies first in case someone already did!!!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Life is short, be gracious and kind!

...you talking to MIL? You know, the woman who doesn't share FAMILY recipes with "married-in" members of the...wait for it...family?

Yes she can be kind too! but one can only control their self of course. “Sticking it to MIL” is not the path to happiness in life. It achieves nothing of value

Oh, I don't know. It engenders a feeling of schadenfreude.