Friend of several years changed her number and cut me out of her life

[Anonymous]

So I dont know what to do...my really good friend of 20plus years just changed her phone number and isnt calling me anymore. I can be kind of crass sometimes and when she called to tell me she got into a top ranked graduate school, I said "wow, how many hand jobs did you have to give to get in?"

She politely ended the call. I tried to call her and her phone is disconnected...

She knowa Im crass and I just dont get why this is such a big deal..I just cant believe.shed be so extreme as to cut me off...

Thoughts?

[Anonymous]

Probably the end of the line for her. Can't say I blame her either.

[Anonymous]

Seriously, why would someone want to be friends with you?

[Anonymous]

No clue, but you made me laugh!

[Anonymous]

Your peanut butter and jealous was too much for her.

[Anonymous]

That's a really gross thing for you to say. I can how it could be the straw that broke the camel's back.

[Anonymous]

Lesson learned, right OP?

Try treating your friends with kindness.

[Anonymous]

That was cruel. I'd email or mail an apology asap

[Anonymous]

You may be overthinking this. People don't change their phone number for one cray cray friend. Unless you have been stalking her, or there is other drama with you two, the most likely explanation is that she has a new phone number and she simply hasn't given it to you yet.

Seriously, you think she's going to change her digits (major PITA) for YOU!?! You sound a bit self absorbed IMO.

[Anonymous]

I would imagine that there had been a lot of similar comments that happened long before that one. That was a big deal for her and you couldn't give it the respect it deserved. It was probably her last straw.

[Anonymous]

It's weird that this woman would ditch you over a tasteless crack but maybe you also hurt her feelings when you reacted that way to her news. But changing her number just to avoid YOU seems like a very strong message. Are you sure that there isn't something wrong with her phone?

[Anonymous]

I have a friend of 20+ years I'm debating cutting off because she is making such a mess of her life--dating a felon, among other things. (I am definitely not the friend of the OP, not going to grad school again, LOL)

She has complained that several of her local friends have cut her off, and it's ok, because "they weren't supportive of her choices." She wants everyone to be supportive of her, but does not want to be supportive of them.

I'm trying to be there for her, but if she says one more crappy thing about my "gluten free diet" that's allowed me to lose 50 pounds, it may be the end. Seriously. While I'm supposed to listen to the huge wrecked up drama she's created out of her life?

Maybe this could be a part of it, OP?
Maybe it was the last straw for your friend?

[Anonymous]

You would definitely not be my friend. That was a horrible thing to say to her. She worked hard to get into grad school. Shame on you. Grow up, OP!

[Anonymous]

OP,

Being occasionally crass actually means that you are disrespecting your friends. The example you cited is terrible. You accused her of being a prostitute and not being intellectually deserving of her achievement.
How insensitive, jealous and vulgar scan you get?

After a while, you won't have any true friends left, and the acquaintances that stay will do so for the shock and entertainment factor. They will not be there for you when you really need help.

[Anonymous]

Um, really? That's not just crass, you basically said you didn't think she was good enough to get into the program. A friend would have said "Congrats, that's awesome!". I'm pretty sure I'd have dropped you too.