Son is quitting cello
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Anonymous
| My 10 yo is quitting cello. He's been taking lessons for 4 years and is really quite good. However, he's lately lost his love of the instrument; it's really hard to get him to practice and I'm broke. I've spent lots of hours driving and lots of money on lessons and I know this is not "wasted." He will have this in him forever. But I feel very sad that we are letting this go. |
Anonymous
|
I know it is hard when a child gives up something like that. Our dd gave up her musical instrument which she was quite good at to pursue another interest she like more.
Have you asked your son if there's another instrument or activity that he'd like to try? I believe that specialization is not always called for - trying lots of things may be better for your son - I know it's that way for ours. DS likes a broad array of things, DD specialized quickly with a passion for 1 thing. Good luck. FWIW my sister picked up the violin again as an adult and learned a completely new genre of music, plays and performs with an adult group and loves it now. |
Anonymous
| Mine have quit for right now, too. It sucks. I commiserate. |
Anonymous
|
It's hard. I quit piano after more than 10 years of practice, recitals and competitions, and my mother was heartbroken. I've never taking it up since, even though it's always in the back of my mind. When the passion is gone, it's gone. However your son can take up something else! And as you said, your time and money were not wasted. He did stick to it for 4 years and learned some perseverance. |
Anonymous
| "taken it up" |
Anonymous
| I allowed my DD to quit piano after 8 years. I was heartbroken, but it became a battle to get her to practice, and it just wasn't worth it anymore. I'm still sad about it. I've left the keyboard up in the event she just wants to start playing, but it's been 6 months and she hasn't touched it. I don't want to put it away, because then it's really over. But I know I need to, it's really hard to know I won't hear her play anymore. She was good. |
Anonymous
| If it helps, I gave up piano at age 16 and took it back up at age 34. After two years, I surpassed my old level. It's still incrediblely easier, however, to releaen music I haven't played in 20 years, than to pick up new pieces. So it wasn't a waste at all! |
Anonymous
I guess I'm more concerned about this since he new interest, whatever it will be, is just around the corner. OP, success in one thing probably means he will work to succeed in something else. |
Anonymous
| My daughter is 12 years old and takes cello through her school strings program. I never would have paid for it as an extracurricular because I know how she and her brother start something with excitement and then in a year or two their interest fizzles and I feel like I have wasted my money. But, surprisingly she loves it and is quite good at it. She is the only 6th grader playing cello this year and she feels special. So far, so good. |
Anonymous
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OP here. He has other activities and interests. I'm not worried about that. The being broke part factors in because if I weren't broke, I would probably just keep paying for lessons and push him through til his interest reignited (hoping that it would- this happened with my daughter and her instrument). Right now though, I just can't justify the expense when he's not loving it and resisiting practicing. It's just not worth it.
Also, thanks to all the commiserators! Makes me feel a little better. I will miss the beautiful sounds of cello practice. A lot. |
Anonymous
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I'm sorry for your troubles.
My kids are younger- oldest is 8- but I can't imagine being this upset myself about something like this (I can't imagine having that much ownership over their activity that I'd be that upset). I don't mean this as a criticism, but I am curious, is that just the way I am or is it because my kids are little? For instance, the oldest has been dancing for 5 years now and I'd be bummed in some ways but not really... |
Anonymous
I'm PP 11:01. I am sad/disappointed, not upset. She had/has a talent for music and it's ashamed for it to go to waste (at this time), the other part is selfish - I really enjoyed listening to her play. Like I mentioned, she was really good, but just lost the passion and the spark for it. |
Anonymous
| Yeah. It's a me + cello thing mostly. Most of their other activities, I can take or leave. I think it was that he loved it so much for a while and was REALLY good at it and it gave us both such pleasure. I'm sad to let that go. |
Anonymous
why do you think? Forced to practice too much? These are kids after all. |
Anonymous
IDK. I definitely reinforced practicing every day as a habit from a young age. It was not an issue for many years- just a part of our day. Also, I have found with all my kids that if they don't practice consistently, they don't enjoy it because they don't improve and they keep having to go over the same things at their lessons. Mastery fosters enjoyment and practice leads to mastery. |