Oh My Lord. He's got a girlfriend.

[Anonymous]

ACK!

Wait, I'm not ready!

[Anonymous]

Okay how old? No matter, it is okay and it is normal. We will get you okay with this...if it is to be okay with,,,

[Anonymous]

Just tell me he's not 11!

[Anonymous]

It's cool. He's 14. I have a paper bag I'm breathing into. I think I just felt my eyebrows go gray.

[Anonymous]

She's 14. It's all good. They are good smart kids with reasonable parents who have paper bags to breathe into.

[Anonymous]

It's alright. 14 is good. Have you had the talk?

[Anonymous]

(Wheeze suck wheeze) yes. We have had the talk. Several talks.

[Anonymous]

Oh man, I'm OLD!

Ok thanks. I think I'm done freaking out and I'm OK.

[Anonymous]

Okay. I am a counselor and have worked with all boys forever. Play this cool with a ton of confidence. Fake it till you make it.

Let him your rules (and don't bend, it is all you got)

Let him know how much you love him and deeply trust him (even if you don't yet)\


And that no MATTER what, you will support him and that you want him to come to YOU.

This means you speak the words sex, condoms, etc. You will feel sick, he will DIE a thousand deaths, but this matters!!!!

I have talked to a million boys, and they always say if they can go to their parents, so many cannot. Be the parent that CAN. it is HARD for you, but man up. You can do this. Your son will never forget it.

Try to keep a conversation going.

Boys like shooting hoops.

Being in the car.

NOT eye contact.

Be a listener, not a talker.

Say things like "Do you want to hear what I think?"

And then shut up.


If you think your kid is in danger you act, but otherwise, keep reinforcing how you are THERE. You CARE. You WANT TO KNOW.

Your kid is learning about relationships...but he alreayd has from you. If you have been a good example, rest assured in that.

[Anonymous]

PUT AN OPEN BOX OF CONDEMS WHERE HE CAN SEE THEM!! Like his bathroom. The reason why you open them is because he may think you are looking and will freak if the box is opened! (sorry, did not read all the other responses, just wanted to chime in).

[Anonymous]

PP here. Read the responses. NICE KIDS HAVE SEX!

FWIW, we enjoyed our sons g'friends and our boys were happy.

[Anonymous]

Thanks, all.

Yeah, I know. When I was a young nice kid I had sex. I think it will be OK. I'll man up, even though I'm his mom.

[Anonymous]

Wide variation in who does what and what is done between BF/GF, hook-ups. To quote one of my kids "unless they're a nerd all the girls have already had sex at _ [school]"

14 is young for sex at some schools. Extremely rare. Later years at parties and afterparties. For kids without in-school sports afterschool there can be lots of hooking up at unsupervised houses.

Very few of my teens friends have had sex.

[Anonymous]

I love these threads where a mom is shocked at something their kids are doing. But, they should ask themselves WHAT THEY DID at the same age. These kids do the same things YOU did, except now they have technology (cell phones, facebook, etc,...) for good or for bad.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I love these threads where a mom is shocked at something their kids are doing. But, they should ask themselves WHAT THEY DID at the same age. These kids do the same things YOU did, except now they have technology (cell phones, facebook, etc,...) for good or for bad.

OP here. I'm not really shocked. I knew it was coming someday. Just...damn. My son's got a girlfriend. How did that happen? Didn't you just learn to make a PB&J and tie your shoes?