S/O Dating a "State Department" employee
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Anonymous
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Aka dating someone in the Agency.
Anyone (as an outsider or insider) have experience dating someone with this job? I briefly did and heard some horror stories about cheating, etc. My impression was that most were single and had great difficulties maintaining a healthy balance in life. |
Anonymous
| Is he in the foreign service? You know they move every 2-3 yrs and don't get much control over assignments. |
Anonymous
Read more carefully... |
Anonymous
Cue music: Wa, wah, waaaah! 
Most spy work is boring. If someone is a cheater, they'd be a cheater no matter what their profession. |
Anonymous
| Never dated anyone in it but my dad worked in the state department and he fits this bill. Very dishonest, will straight up admit to your face that he lied to you about something, and super cheap. He was a monster of a husband and we grew to love the years when he was away. When he came back after 3 years the relationship just fell apart- I have never met anyone with poorer interpersonal skills. Everything had to be his way, there was no room for my mom's opinion. She finally left when I was 16 and we all cut off contact with him. Because he wouldnt pay for college and I was drowning in student loans we were forced to get back in touch with him, but it;s not a close relationship to say the least. He is always moaning about how my mother left him and hoping to get back together with her, meanwhile my mother would not go there in a million years. He has been through a string of women since them, never really gotten too close and doesnt have any close friends. Now he is single and alone- his closest friend is his mother. I would feel bad for him if he weren't such a P.O.S. This is a man who has a trust fund and makes 6 figures and thinks Chipotle is an expensive meal- everything with him is shoddy and a struggle. SO if others in the state department are like him, then yes, stay far away. |
Anonymous
Lol. Understood that the work is boring. My suspicion is that the men attracted to such a job are more egotistical than the typical DC guy (and that is saying something!) The stories I've heard about cheating or gross escapades especially when they are on assignment abroad were cringe worthy. |
Anonymous
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Like I said I don't think the cheating is limited to the profession. I knew someone who used work for one of those big management consulting groups. She said people acted like it was college hopping room to room when people were staying over night for work.
So the people that do the egregious cheating would be doing that no matter what their profession. An egomaniac/womanizer can't really hide it. People are pretty obvious. Get to know him. If he seems like a straight shooter than he probably is. |
Anonymous
| People in the IC, in my experience, are actually quite honest. We tend to avoid positions that put us in compromising positions. |
Anonymous
| I think you're overthinking it, OP. People with any perceived power/prestige sometimes allow it to go to their heads. Lots of asshole lawyers out here, but also lots of awesome people who are lawyers too. This is akin to asking are people in zip code 20003 likely cheaters because it's on Cap Hill. |
Anonymous
You have as many issues as he does if you think generalizing like this is instructive. |
Anonymous
State Dept. employees are not spies. They are bureaucrats. Paper pushers. Cable senders. |
Anonymous
yes - though it is easier to date within the Agency. I have never dated NCS though - only DI and S&T. The only gf's that knew when I was an employee were those that were employees as well. I wasn't provided cover (DI) but I had a shell 'economics and strategy consulting' business that I registered, created a simple website and business cards and none of my gf's on the outside ever questioned it (I never really did an extended tour oconus which is why it worked). |
Anonymous
agree with the first part, disagree with the second. Opportunity and options is a huge part of propensity to cheat. I have have an acquaintance who plays in MLB and he's a really good and stand up guy but you just get so much pussy thrown in your face and you are constantly on the road and never home that it's tough not to slip. |
Anonymous
| If you like moving every three years, then you'll be fine. Also, you will experience a big let down once you rejoin life here in the states from being a big somebody who gets to go to the A-list parties (even meeting the queen) to just being the spouse of another civil servant. They treat diplomats like rock stars in many countries. |
Anonymous
He is nit a State Dept employee... |