Does anyone hate how competitive the world has become?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think what’s hard for a lot of us is we grew up in a time when things were less competitive but we grew up in families without a lot of money. So if you had the money, there was a lot of opportunity and you could join a swim club, join a gymnastics team, or get into a good private school as long as you could pay for it.

I remember thinking as a kid that I just needed to make money so I could give my kids those things. But now there is an order of magnitude more of people who are trying to get the same things, and in most places there aren’t more swim clubs being built, more competitive gymnastics programs being opened, or more elite private schools opening. We thought we could just earn more money and that would earn us access, but the finish line has been moved and the bar has been raised along the way.

You probably focused too much on buying a home in the “best” school pyramid and/or that private school, unaware that living in such a place would make other things harder.

We couldn’t afford buying in those places, so we moved outside the beltway.

Lo and behold, we were able to join a swim club relatively easily, my kids made their sports teams, and they are getting a fine education at their public school and will get to go to college. None of those things are the fanciest, but does it matter? They are getting all of the benefits of the swim club and being on teams. That is far better than not having them at all.

I think what you wrote is true for a lot of people. But I actually live out of DC/VA now in a mid-size city that unfortunately grew at a pace far faster than it has built new things. We don’t really have fancy schools or neighborhoods here on the scale of northern VA or parts of MD close to DC. That’s why this thread hits so close to home for me. If even second-rate, sort of dumpy cities have become crazy competitive just to access a pool and a sports team, that says a lot about the world.

I have a friend who moved to what I would consider a dreamy place. She lives by water in a slow paced area with lots of nature. She is constantly complaining about the lack of options and how her kids are falling behind in both academics and everything. There just aren’t as many opportunities. She said the soccer was worse than rec soccer in VA. It is just for kids to run around. She hates it and misses the DMV.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think what’s hard for a lot of us is we grew up in a time when things were less competitive but we grew up in families without a lot of money. So if you had the money, there was a lot of opportunity and you could join a swim club, join a gymnastics team, or get into a good private school as long as you could pay for it.

I remember thinking as a kid that I just needed to make money so I could give my kids those things. But now there is an order of magnitude more of people who are trying to get the same things, and in most places there aren’t more swim clubs being built, more competitive gymnastics programs being opened, or more elite private schools opening. We thought we could just earn more money and that would earn us access, but the finish line has been moved and the bar has been raised along the way.

You probably focused too much on buying a home in the “best” school pyramid and/or that private school, unaware that living in such a place would make other things harder.

We couldn’t afford buying in those places, so we moved outside the beltway.

Lo and behold, we were able to join a swim club relatively easily, my kids made their sports teams, and they are getting a fine education at their public school and will get to go to college. None of those things are the fanciest, but does it matter? They are getting all of the benefits of the swim club and being on teams. That is far better than not having them at all.

I think what you wrote is true for a lot of people. But I actually live out of DC/VA now in a mid-size city that unfortunately grew at a pace far faster than it has built new things. We don’t really have fancy schools or neighborhoods here on the scale of northern VA or parts of MD close to DC. That’s why this thread hits so close to home for me. If even second-rate, sort of dumpy cities have become crazy competitive just to access a pool and a sports team, that says a lot about the world.

I have a friend who moved to what I would consider a dreamy place. She lives by water in a slow paced area with lots of nature. She is constantly complaining about the lack of options and how her kids are falling behind in both academics and everything. There just aren’t as many opportunities. She said the soccer was worse than rec soccer in VA. It is just for kids to run around. She hates it and misses the DMV.

"why can't kids just play soccer for fun"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I said this before, and I'll say this again. In order to make a varsity team in expensive neighborhoods such as Langley, McLean, Potomac, kids, on average, are from either UMC or UC families, with extensive training when they were young.

You can, of course, point out a few exceptions here and there, but exceptions are not the norm.

So wealthier kids are more likely to make the teams at wealthier schools in wealthier neighborhoods than poor kids who can’t afford to live in those neighborhoods and therefore don’t attend those schools? Shut the front door! What an amazing insight!

Don't shoot the messenger because I am just pointing out the reality of it. How many students from Langley (Virginia) or Churchill (Potomac, MD) HS are starters on the tennis or golf varsity teams that come from low-income families, and have zero experience prior to the tryouts? Exceptions are not the norm.

You missed the point. Next you’ll be amazing us all with your incredible observation that the athletes who represented China in the Olympics are all Chinese.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I said this before, and I'll say this again. In order to make a varsity team in expensive neighborhoods such as Langley, McLean, Potomac, kids, on average, are from either UMC or UC families, with extensive training when they were young.

You can, of course, point out a few exceptions here and there, but exceptions are not the norm.

So wealthier kids are more likely to make the teams at wealthier schools in wealthier neighborhoods than poor kids who can’t afford to live in those neighborhoods and therefore don’t attend those schools? Shut the front door! What an amazing insight!

She’s truly brilliant but can afford Larlos tennis lessons so he can play number 8 on Langley

Having money does not guarantee that your kids will make HS varsity teams in wealthy areas, but not having money guarantees that your kids will likely NOT make HS varsity teams due to lack of training. There are sports where not having money for training will hurt you, no matter how talented you are.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I said this before, and I'll say this again. In order to make a varsity team in expensive neighborhoods such as Langley, McLean, Potomac, kids, on average, are from either UMC or UC families, with extensive training when they were young.

You can, of course, point out a few exceptions here and there, but exceptions are not the norm.

So wealthier kids are more likely to make the teams at wealthier schools in wealthier neighborhoods than poor kids who can’t afford to live in those neighborhoods and therefore don’t attend those schools? Shut the front door! What an amazing insight!

She’s truly brilliant but can afford Larlos tennis lessons so he can play number 8 on Langley

Having money does not guarantee that your kids will make HS varsity teams in wealthy areas, but not having money guarantees that your kids will likely NOT make HS varsity teams due to lack of training. There are sports where not having money for training will hurt you, no matter how talented you are.

More importantly, not having money will guarantee that your kid won’t make varsity at the wealthy high schools because you can’t afford to live in the wealthy neighborhoods that feed those high schools.

Poor athletic talented kids will make varsity at poor high schools, get recruited, and eventually turn pro, while rich little Larlo is still going to be bragging at 40 about how he was a multi sport athlete because he played golf and water polo…

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Having money does not guarantee that your kids will make HS varsity teams in wealthy areas, but not having money guarantees that your kids will likely NOT make HS varsity teams due to lack of training. There are sports where not having money for training will hurt you, no matter how talented you are.

More importantly, not having money will guarantee that your kid won’t make varsity at the wealthy high schools because you can’t afford to live in the wealthy neighborhoods that feed those high schools.

Poor athletic talented kids will make varsity at poor high schools, get recruited, and eventually turn pro, while rich little Larlo is still going to be bragging at 40 about how he was a multi sport athlete because he played golf and water polo…

Maybe in football. They will likely get CTE from playing football, go broke five years after playing football, get arrested for domestic violence, and go to prison.

Meanwhile, Larlo is working for Blackstone in his 40's because he played golf or water polo in HS...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I said this before, and I'll say this again. In order to make a varsity team in expensive neighborhoods such as Langley, McLean, Potomac, kids, on average, are from either UMC or UC families, with extensive training when they were young.

You can, of course, point out a few exceptions here and there, but exceptions are not the norm.

So you live a life of competition in a house you overpaid for and looks bad and is cramped, and your kids can't even do activities they love unless they strive from 5yo on? What is the point of doing this?

DP here. DH always says you play to your field. If you are surrounded by smart kids from good families whose parents are successful, you rise up with those kids. We would rather our kids be average at the top.

If everyone is average at the top, then there are not opportunities for all these average kids, isn't that what people are saying regarding sports?

The ones at the so-called top are average because they only paid to get there. If everyone had the same opportunities, those at the so-called top would not be there. We have a lot of poseurs here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I said this before, and I'll say this again. In order to make a varsity team in expensive neighborhoods such as Langley, McLean, Potomac, kids, on average, are from either UMC or UC families, with extensive training when they were young.

You can, of course, point out a few exceptions here and there, but exceptions are not the norm.

So wealthier kids are more likely to make the teams at wealthier schools in wealthier neighborhoods than poor kids who can’t afford to live in those neighborhoods and therefore don’t attend those schools? Shut the front door! What an amazing insight!

She’s truly brilliant but can afford Larlos tennis lessons so he can play number 8 on Langley

Having money does not guarantee that your kids will make HS varsity teams in wealthy areas, but not having money guarantees that your kids will likely NOT make HS varsity teams due to lack of training. There are sports where not having money for training will hurt you, no matter how talented you are.

More importantly, not having money will guarantee that your kid won’t make varsity at the wealthy high schools because you can’t afford to live in the wealthy neighborhoods that feed those high schools.

Poor athletic talented kids will make varsity at poor high schools, get recruited, and eventually turn pro, while rich little Larlo is still going to be bragging at 40 about how he was a multi sport athlete because he played golf and water polo…

Most of the poor high schools have terrible sports teams. Nobody recruits from terrible teams and good players will do anything possible to get out of there.

The hope is you get connected to someone that can connect you to the sports privates. In the DMV, the WCAC teams for most sports…as well as STA, Landon, Georgetown Prep as well (though those are harder to gain acceptance).

The scenario you outlined is now almost extinct.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I said this before, and I'll say this again. In order to make a varsity team in expensive neighborhoods such as Langley, McLean, Potomac, kids, on average, are from either UMC or UC families, with extensive training when they were young.

You can, of course, point out a few exceptions here and there, but exceptions are not the norm.

So wealthier kids are more likely to make the teams at wealthier schools in wealthier neighborhoods than poor kids who can’t afford to live in those neighborhoods and therefore don’t attend those schools? Shut the front door! What an amazing insight!

She’s truly brilliant but can afford Larlos tennis lessons so he can play number 8 on Langley

Having money does not guarantee that your kids will make HS varsity teams in wealthy areas, but not having money guarantees that your kids will likely NOT make HS varsity teams due to lack of training. There are sports where not having money for training will hurt you, no matter how talented you are.

More importantly, not having money will guarantee that your kid won’t make varsity at the wealthy high schools because you can’t afford to live in the wealthy neighborhoods that feed those high schools.

Poor athletic talented kids will make varsity at poor high schools, get recruited, and eventually turn pro, while rich little Larlo is still going to be bragging at 40 about how he was a multi sport athlete because he played golf and water polo…

Most of the poor high schools have terrible sports teams. Nobody recruits from terrible teams and good players will do anything possible to get out of there.

The hope is you get connected to someone that can connect you to the sports privates. In the DMV, the WCAC teams for most sports…as well as STA, Landon, Georgetown Prep as well (though those are harder to gain acceptance).

The scenario you outlined is now almost extinct.

Herndon sent a kid to Princeton baseball this year. Seems like better ROI than Langley/McLean pyramids. 🤷‍♀️

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I said this before, and I'll say this again. In order to make a varsity team in expensive neighborhoods such as Langley, McLean, Potomac, kids, on average, are from either UMC or UC families, with extensive training when they were young.

You can, of course, point out a few exceptions here and there, but exceptions are not the norm.

So wealthier kids are more likely to make the teams at wealthier schools in wealthier neighborhoods than poor kids who can’t afford to live in those neighborhoods and therefore don’t attend those schools? Shut the front door! What an amazing insight!

She’s truly brilliant but can afford Larlos tennis lessons so he can play number 8 on Langley

Having money does not guarantee that your kids will make HS varsity teams in wealthy areas, but not having money guarantees that your kids will likely NOT make HS varsity teams due to lack of training. There are sports where not having money for training will hurt you, no matter how talented you are.

More importantly, not having money will guarantee that your kid won’t make varsity at the wealthy high schools because you can’t afford to live in the wealthy neighborhoods that feed those high schools.

Poor athletic talented kids will make varsity at poor high schools, get recruited, and eventually turn pro, while rich little Larlo is still going to be bragging at 40 about how he was a multi sport athlete because he played golf and water polo…

Most of the poor high schools have terrible sports teams. Nobody recruits from terrible teams and good players will do anything possible to get out of there.

The hope is you get connected to someone that can connect you to the sports privates. In the DMV, the WCAC teams for most sports…as well as STA, Landon, Georgetown Prep as well (though those are harder to gain acceptance).

The scenario you outlined is now almost extinct.

DCPS is a great microcosm of this. With the exception of football, JR wins nearly every DCPS sports championship, followed by Walls. JR basketball is ranked top 30 in the country.

These two schools have the highest median incomes in DCPS by far.

JR used to be the best in football before CTE and other injury risk scared UMC players away. Now, frankly, they are terrible.

That said, SJC and Gonzaga are so incredible at football they no longer play Dunbar or other DCPS teams because the injury risk to DCPS players is so massive.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I said this before, and I'll say this again. In order to make a varsity team in expensive neighborhoods such as Langley, McLean, Potomac, kids, on average, are from either UMC or UC families, with extensive training when they were young.

You can, of course, point out a few exceptions here and there, but exceptions are not the norm.

So wealthier kids are more likely to make the teams at wealthier schools in wealthier neighborhoods than poor kids who can’t afford to live in those neighborhoods and therefore don’t attend those schools? Shut the front door! What an amazing insight!

She’s truly brilliant but can afford Larlos tennis lessons so he can play number 8 on Langley

Having money does not guarantee that your kids will make HS varsity teams in wealthy areas, but not having money guarantees that your kids will likely NOT make HS varsity teams due to lack of training. There are sports where not having money for training will hurt you, no matter how talented you are.

More importantly, not having money will guarantee that your kid won’t make varsity at the wealthy high schools because you can’t afford to live in the wealthy neighborhoods that feed those high schools.

Poor athletic talented kids will make varsity at poor high schools, get recruited, and eventually turn pro, while rich little Larlo is still going to be bragging at 40 about how he was a multi sport athlete because he played golf and water polo…

Most of the poor high schools have terrible sports teams. Nobody recruits from terrible teams and good players will do anything possible to get out of there.

The hope is you get connected to someone that can connect you to the sports privates. In the DMV, the WCAC teams for most sports…as well as STA, Landon, Georgetown Prep as well (though those are harder to gain acceptance).

The scenario you outlined is now almost extinct.

Herndon sent a kid to Princeton baseball this year. Seems like better ROI than Langley/McLean pyramids. 🤷‍♀️

Herndon isn’t poor, is it? Gonzaga sent a kid…and the rest are all prep school kids for Princeton. STA sent a kid the year prior.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I said this before, and I'll say this again. In order to make a varsity team in expensive neighborhoods such as Langley, McLean, Potomac, kids, on average, are from either UMC or UC families, with extensive training when they were young.

You can, of course, point out a few exceptions here and there, but exceptions are not the norm.

So wealthier kids are more likely to make the teams at wealthier schools in wealthier neighborhoods than poor kids who can’t afford to live in those neighborhoods and therefore don’t attend those schools? Shut the front door! What an amazing insight!

She’s truly brilliant but can afford Larlos tennis lessons so he can play number 8 on Langley

Having money does not guarantee that your kids will make HS varsity teams in wealthy areas, but not having money guarantees that your kids will likely NOT make HS varsity teams due to lack of training. There are sports where not having money for training will hurt you, no matter how talented you are.

More importantly, not having money will guarantee that your kid won’t make varsity at the wealthy high schools because you can’t afford to live in the wealthy neighborhoods that feed those high schools.

Poor athletic talented kids will make varsity at poor high schools, get recruited, and eventually turn pro, while rich little Larlo is still going to be bragging at 40 about how he was a multi sport athlete because he played golf and water polo…

Most of the poor high schools have terrible sports teams. Nobody recruits from terrible teams and good players will do anything possible to get out of there.

The hope is you get connected to someone that can connect you to the sports privates. In the DMV, the WCAC teams for most sports…as well as STA, Landon, Georgetown Prep as well (though those are harder to gain acceptance).

The scenario you outlined is now almost extinct.

Herndon sent a kid to Princeton baseball this year. Seems like better ROI than Langley/McLean pyramids. 🤷‍♀️

Herndon isn’t poor, is it? Gonzaga sent a kid…and the rest are all prep school kids for Princeton. STA sent a kid the year prior.

LOL. You must be new to DCUM.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I said this before, and I'll say this again. In order to make a varsity team in expensive neighborhoods such as Langley, McLean, Potomac, kids, on average, are from either UMC or UC families, with extensive training when they were young.

You can, of course, point out a few exceptions here and there, but exceptions are not the norm.

So wealthier kids are more likely to make the teams at wealthier schools in wealthier neighborhoods than poor kids who can’t afford to live in those neighborhoods and therefore don’t attend those schools? Shut the front door! What an amazing insight!

She’s truly brilliant but can afford Larlos tennis lessons so he can play number 8 on Langley

Having money does not guarantee that your kids will make HS varsity teams in wealthy areas, but not having money guarantees that your kids will likely NOT make HS varsity teams due to lack of training. There are sports where not having money for training will hurt you, no matter how talented you are.

More importantly, not having money will guarantee that your kid won’t make varsity at the wealthy high schools because you can’t afford to live in the wealthy neighborhoods that feed those high schools.

Poor athletic talented kids will make varsity at poor high schools, get recruited, and eventually turn pro, while rich little Larlo is still going to be bragging at 40 about how he was a multi sport athlete because he played golf and water polo…

Most of the poor high schools have terrible sports teams. Nobody recruits from terrible teams and good players will do anything possible to get out of there.

The hope is you get connected to someone that can connect you to the sports privates. In the DMV, the WCAC teams for most sports…as well as STA, Landon, Georgetown Prep as well (though those are harder to gain acceptance).

The scenario you outlined is now almost extinct.

Herndon sent a kid to Princeton baseball this year. Seems like better ROI than Langley/McLean pyramids. 🤷‍♀️

Herndon isn’t poor, is it? Gonzaga sent a kid…and the rest are all prep school kids for Princeton. STA sent a kid the year prior.

LOL. You must be new to DCUM.

Why…is Herndon poor? I have to imagine it’s higher income than say most DCPS high schools or schools like Einstein in Silver spring and most PG County schools.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I said this before, and I'll say this again. In order to make a varsity team in expensive neighborhoods such as Langley, McLean, Potomac, kids, on average, are from either UMC or UC families, with extensive training when they were young.

You can, of course, point out a few exceptions here and there, but exceptions are not the norm.

So wealthier kids are more likely to make the teams at wealthier schools in wealthier neighborhoods than poor kids who can’t afford to live in those neighborhoods and therefore don’t attend those schools? Shut the front door! What an amazing insight!

She’s truly brilliant but can afford Larlos tennis lessons so he can play number 8 on Langley

Having money does not guarantee that your kids will make HS varsity teams in wealthy areas, but not having money guarantees that your kids will likely NOT make HS varsity teams due to lack of training. There are sports where not having money for training will hurt you, no matter how talented you are.

More importantly, not having money will guarantee that your kid won’t make varsity at the wealthy high schools because you can’t afford to live in the wealthy neighborhoods that feed those high schools.

Poor athletic talented kids will make varsity at poor high schools, get recruited, and eventually turn pro, while rich little Larlo is still going to be bragging at 40 about how he was a multi sport athlete because he played golf and water polo…

Most of the poor high schools have terrible sports teams. Nobody recruits from terrible teams and good players will do anything possible to get out of there.

The hope is you get connected to someone that can connect you to the sports privates. In the DMV, the WCAC teams for most sports…as well as STA, Landon, Georgetown Prep as well (though those are harder to gain acceptance).

The scenario you outlined is now almost extinct.

Herndon sent a kid to Princeton baseball this year. Seems like better ROI than Langley/McLean pyramids. 🤷‍♀️

Herndon isn’t poor, is it? Gonzaga sent a kid…and the rest are all prep school kids for Princeton. STA sent a kid the year prior.

LOL. You must be new to DCUM.

Why…is Herndon poor? I have to imagine it’s higher income than say most DCPS high schools or schools like Einstein in Silver spring and most PG County schools.

Just search the FCPS schools forum.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I said this before, and I'll say this again. In order to make a varsity team in expensive neighborhoods such as Langley, McLean, Potomac, kids, on average, are from either UMC or UC families, with extensive training when they were young.

You can, of course, point out a few exceptions here and there, but exceptions are not the norm.

So wealthier kids are more likely to make the teams at wealthier schools in wealthier neighborhoods than poor kids who can’t afford to live in those neighborhoods and therefore don’t attend those schools? Shut the front door! What an amazing insight!

She’s truly brilliant but can afford Larlos tennis lessons so he can play number 8 on Langley

Having money does not guarantee that your kids will make HS varsity teams in wealthy areas, but not having money guarantees that your kids will likely NOT make HS varsity teams due to lack of training. There are sports where not having money for training will hurt you, no matter how talented you are.

More importantly, not having money will guarantee that your kid won’t make varsity at the wealthy high schools because you can’t afford to live in the wealthy neighborhoods that feed those high schools.

Poor athletic talented kids will make varsity at poor high schools, get recruited, and eventually turn pro, while rich little Larlo is still going to be bragging at 40 about how he was a multi sport athlete because he played golf and water polo…

Most of the poor high schools have terrible sports teams. Nobody recruits from terrible teams and good players will do anything possible to get out of there.

The hope is you get connected to someone that can connect you to the sports privates. In the DMV, the WCAC teams for most sports…as well as STA, Landon, Georgetown Prep as well (though those are harder to gain acceptance).

The scenario you outlined is now almost extinct.

Herndon sent a kid to Princeton baseball this year. Seems like better ROI than Langley/McLean pyramids. 🤷‍♀️

Herndon isn’t poor, is it? Gonzaga sent a kid…and the rest are all prep school kids for Princeton. STA sent a kid the year prior.

LOL. You must be new to DCUM.

Why…is Herndon poor? I have to imagine it’s higher income than say most DCPS high schools or schools like Einstein in Silver spring and most PG County schools.

Just search the FCPS schools forum.

Yeah…not that interested…let’s just say after looking at the school website, the school isn’t poor. The facilities are quite nice. Also median income in Herndon is $135k.

It may be poor compared to Langley…but it’s not poor at all.