Does anyone hate how competitive the world has become?

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:This is not true at all. There are tons of sports that require wealth. Sure it helps if kids have an athletic physique once they go through puberty; however, wealth makes quite a difference in a lot of sports.

Downhill skiing, squash, tennis, golf, hockey, equestrian sports, fencing, ice skating are some examples of sports that require tons of money. My friend taught at a private school in Florida where it accommodated students' sports schedules which included swimming, tennis, equestrian sports, fencing and car racing. All of those kids were super wealthy.

Yes they may require money but it doesn’t necessarily mean the kids will be good. Are you seriously debating this

Are you kidding? You need money to get good in tennis or golf. Even Francis Tiafoe needs serious training that JTCC provided him for FREE due to his family situation. Scott Scheffler wouldn't be the best golfer in the world had his family was poor.

If you have kid A and B with the same athletic ability, but kid A has wealth and kid B is poor, kid A will come out ahead in athletic because kid A gets the best training money can buy.

You’re forgetting about the genetics that are needed to create an elite athlete. You can bring the kid to reach his full potential by hard work, good nutrition and training but without certain genetics his full potential won’t be good enough.

Look at the Olympic sprinters. Do you think money would allow your child to be that fast? The ACTN3 gene, is sometimes referred to as the “athlete gene”. In our muscles, the two main types of muscle fibres are slow-twitch and fast-twitch fibres. These are the easily identified genes that can found on a DNA saliva test.

My family is middle class with a lot of athletes including pro athletes. Nobody needed crazy excessive training, no private coaches.

Both your lies about your family and your lack of understanding about how much training even the kid with great genetics undergo are comical.

Caleb Williams had a QB coach starting in 8th grade, Quincy Wilson has had professional coaching since 6th grade…the list goes on and on…

I don’t know, I think you have a pretty compelling list there of (let me count again) TWO examples of athletes who has professional coaching as kids. I think two gets you fully out of the realm of “anecdote” doesn’t it?

It’s everyone…considering you didnt even list your fake family pro athletes that’s infinitely more than your zero.

Name me one recent pro athlete that fits your description.

DP but are you asking for someone to name a professional athlete who got there not due to expensive private coaching but rather due to having superior genetics even though they were only middle class growing up?

You can’t be serious.

How can you possibly separate the two..even the ones with superior genetics all have private coaching. Everyone…they may get it for free or low cost…but they all get it.

So, yes name one that had no private coaching and turned pro.

I mean… I would think technically anyone who is on a high school team gets some form of private coaching (professional high school coaches are only going to coach the kids they personally select for their team, right?).

Maybe you need to define your terms here.

And if they’re getting extra private coaching for free, that’s because they have superior athletic ability and has nothing whatsoever to do with their family’s wealth or resources, so you are basically proving a PP’s point that if you’re athletic you don’t need money to make it…

I certainly don’t think some random Joe who has literally never been coached before is going to walk onto an NFL team.

I am uncertain as to the point you think you are making.

You don’t think there are kids blessed with great genetics that go nowhere in sports because they didn’t have money or connections to people that could help them? That’s most of them.

One of the best AAU travel teams in the DMV is Team Durant. Every kid on the team has multiple D1 offers. Every kid is actually UMC including the JR kid…and yes the Sidwell, O’Connell and other players.

Go look at the best NHL stars…outside of the Canadians they all come from elite boarding and private schools.

The best HS baseball players are primarily UMC including Ethan Holliday and basically every player on the U18 team that just won the international baseball championship in Panama. SJC has a kid that may go high in the 2026 draft and he is from Great Falls…who BTW has been getting training since a middle schooler. Bryce Eldridge trained at R&D privately for years even though he also had great coaches at Madison.

Once more…just name one player that fits your profile…you can’t even do that. That’s not how things work anymore.

You’re out of your mind. Seriously. Also, LOL to the “outside of the Canadians” comment re: the NHL (and you mean “outside of the Canadians… and the Europeans” anyway, so you know, most of the players in the NHL) but sure, I think ice hockey *in the US* is more of a rich kid sport. Happy?

So…you come back with nothing…other than I am out of my mind because I gave several specific examples across multiple sports.

That’s literally all you have. I thought so.

You can’t give one example. BTW, the European hockey players are all plucked for National Academies at a young age. Same for basketball and soccer…for soccer, you have kids as young as 5 getting tagged for talent.

Ignorance is bliss.

What you are failing to understand is the talented kids *aren’t paying* for their “elite” training. Parents like you, with no athletic ability and no size and no skill but with plenty of money, are paying to “train” your kids at these facilities… because they need your money to train the kids who actually have potential.

IMG academy costs 90K a year. You know who’s not paying that? Most of the kids who are going to turn pro. But the academy (which ultimately is only interested in training those kids) needs funding, and that’s where rich parents like you come in. Then they can lure in the next generation of suckers by touting how many of their alumni turned pro! But that’s not going to be your kid, Dude. If you’re the one seeking out the opportunities, and you’re the one paying for the training, your kid probably doesn’t have it. Sorry.

IMG Academy gives very few scholarships.

James Triantos paid 100% to attend for several years and was a 2nd round draft pick by the Cubs.

Fairly certain James Wood also paid nearly 100%…he wasn’t on any scholarship at SJC before he left.

What about girl athletes?

What options to they have? Any good coaches or faculties or programs left for them?

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:1.5 million for a home is not modest! Just have some perspective on it all - there are lots of kids who go to top schools and do not succeed there and there are lots who go to less sought after schools and do amazing. The things that matter in life, that make it rich and interesting and alive are not bought by travel sports and ivy diplomas.

This is what 1.5m gets you in McLean. I consider this a modest house.

https://www.zillow.com/homedetails/8007-Lewinsville-Rd-Mc-Lean-VA-22102/51747862_zpid/

This would be one of the nicest houses in the town in which I grew up. I’m sure I’m not the only one who could say that. 5 bedrooms, 4 bathrooms, 3K+ square feet is not “modest” by any reasonable understanding of the word.

It was built 60 years ago and doesn’t look very updated. It’s definitely modest for McLean.

well okay, but McLean is not a modest place. It's one of the richest communities in the country. A "modest" house in one of the most expensive and affluent places in the US requires a very high income.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:1.5 million for a home is not modest! Just have some perspective on it all - there are lots of kids who go to top schools and do not succeed there and there are lots who go to less sought after schools and do amazing. The things that matter in life, that make it rich and interesting and alive are not bought by travel sports and ivy diplomas.

This is what 1.5m gets you in McLean. I consider this a modest house.

https://www.zillow.com/homedetails/8007-Lewinsville-Rd-Mc-Lean-VA-22102/51747862_zpid/

This would be one of the nicest houses in the town in which I grew up. I’m sure I’m not the only one who could say that. 5 bedrooms, 4 bathrooms, 3K+ square feet is not “modest” by any reasonable understanding of the word.

It was built 60 years ago and doesn’t look very updated. It’s definitely modest for McLean.

well okay, but McLean is not a modest place. It's one of the richest communities in the country. A "modest" house in one of the most expensive and affluent places in the US requires a very high income.

+1

“Modest for…” isn’t a thing. It’s not a modest house.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It’s just the dc area. Move to the south or Midwest

Not true

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think what’s hard for a lot of us is we grew up in a time when things were less competitive but we grew up in families without a lot of money. So if you had the money, there was a lot of opportunity and you could join a swim club, join a gymnastics team, or get into a good private school as long as you could pay for it.

I remember thinking as a kid that I just needed to make money so I could give my kids those things. But now there is an order of magnitude more of people who are trying to get the same things, and in most places there aren’t more swim clubs being built, more competitive gymnastics programs being opened, or more elite private schools opening. We thought we could just earn more money and that would earn us access, but the finish line has been moved and the bar has been raised along the way.

You probably focused too much on buying a home in the “best” school pyramid and/or that private school, unaware that living in such a place would make other things harder.

We couldn’t afford buying in those places, so we moved outside the beltway.

Lo and behold, we were able to join a swim club relatively easily, my kids made their sports teams, and they are getting a fine education at their public school and will get to go to college. None of those things are the fanciest, but does it matter? They are getting all of the benefits of the swim club and being on teams. That is far better than not having them at all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think what’s hard for a lot of us is we grew up in a time when things were less competitive but we grew up in families without a lot of money. So if you had the money, there was a lot of opportunity and you could join a swim club, join a gymnastics team, or get into a good private school as long as you could pay for it.

I remember thinking as a kid that I just needed to make money so I could give my kids those things. But now there is an order of magnitude more of people who are trying to get the same things, and in most places there aren’t more swim clubs being built, more competitive gymnastics programs being opened, or more elite private schools opening. We thought we could just earn more money and that would earn us access, but the finish line has been moved and the bar has been raised along the way.

You probably focused too much on buying a home in the “best” school pyramid and/or that private school, unaware that living in such a place would make other things harder.

We couldn’t afford buying in those places, so we moved outside the beltway.

Lo and behold, we were able to join a swim club relatively easily, my kids made their sports teams, and they are getting a fine education at their public school and will get to go to college. None of those things are the fanciest, but does it matter? They are getting all of the benefits of the swim club and being on teams. That is far better than not having them at all.

But they’re mediocre

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:I said this before, and I'll say this again. In order to make a varsity team in expensive neighborhoods such as Langley, McLean, Potomac, kids, on average, are from either UMC or UC families, with extensive training when they were young.

You can, of course, point out a few exceptions here and there, but exceptions are not the norm.

So wealthier kids are more likely to make the teams at wealthier schools in wealthier neighborhoods than poor kids who can’t afford to live in those neighborhoods and therefore don’t attend those schools? Shut the front door! What an amazing insight!

Don't shoot the messenger because I am just pointing out the reality of it. How many students from Langley (Virginia) or Churchill (Potomac, MD) HS are starters on the tennis or golf varsity teams that come from low-income families, and have zero experience prior to the tryouts? Exceptions are not the norm.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You probably focused too much on buying a home in the “best” school pyramid and/or that private school, unaware that living in such a place would make other things harder.

We couldn’t afford buying in those places, so we moved outside the beltway.

Lo and behold, we were able to join a swim club relatively easily, my kids made their sports teams, and they are getting a fine education at their public school and will get to go to college. None of those things are the fanciest, but does it matter? They are getting all of the benefits of the swim club and being on teams. That is far better than not having them at all.

It's like saying because my kid can't play soccer for UVA because it is so competitive so he/she will play for Radford University instead. Radford is several levels below UVA in both academics and athletics.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I said this before, and I'll say this again. In order to make a varsity team in expensive neighborhoods such as Langley, McLean, Potomac, kids, on average, are from either UMC or UC families, with extensive training when they were young.

You can, of course, point out a few exceptions here and there, but exceptions are not the norm.

So you live a life of competition in a house you overpaid for and looks bad and is cramped, and your kids can't even do activities they love unless they strive from 5yo on? What is the point of doing this?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I said this before, and I'll say this again. In order to make a varsity team in expensive neighborhoods such as Langley, McLean, Potomac, kids, on average, are from either UMC or UC families, with extensive training when they were young.

You can, of course, point out a few exceptions here and there, but exceptions are not the norm.

So you live a life of competition in a house you overpaid for and looks bad and is cramped, and your kids can't even do activities they love unless they strive from 5yo on? What is the point of doing this?

DP here. DH always says you play to your field. If you are surrounded by smart kids from good families whose parents are successful, you rise up with those kids. We would rather our kids be average at the top.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I said this before, and I'll say this again. In order to make a varsity team in expensive neighborhoods such as Langley, McLean, Potomac, kids, on average, are from either UMC or UC families, with extensive training when they were young.

You can, of course, point out a few exceptions here and there, but exceptions are not the norm.

So you live a life of competition in a house you overpaid for and looks bad and is cramped, and your kids can't even do activities they love unless they strive from 5yo on? What is the point of doing this?

DP here. DH always says you play to your field. If you are surrounded by smart kids from good families whose parents are successful, you rise up with those kids. We would rather our kids be average at the top.

Exactly. Because when you die there is a prize at the end for who was at the top.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I said this before, and I'll say this again. In order to make a varsity team in expensive neighborhoods such as Langley, McLean, Potomac, kids, on average, are from either UMC or UC families, with extensive training when they were young.

You can, of course, point out a few exceptions here and there, but exceptions are not the norm.

So you live a life of competition in a house you overpaid for and looks bad and is cramped, and your kids can't even do activities they love unless they strive from 5yo on? What is the point of doing this?

DP here. DH always says you play to your field. If you are surrounded by smart kids from good families whose parents are successful, you rise up with those kids. We would rather our kids be average at the top.

If everyone is average at the top, then there are not opportunities for all these average kids, isn't that what people are saying regarding sports?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I said this before, and I'll say this again. In order to make a varsity team in expensive neighborhoods such as Langley, McLean, Potomac, kids, on average, are from either UMC or UC families, with extensive training when they were young.

You can, of course, point out a few exceptions here and there, but exceptions are not the norm.

So wealthier kids are more likely to make the teams at wealthier schools in wealthier neighborhoods than poor kids who can’t afford to live in those neighborhoods and therefore don’t attend those schools? Shut the front door! What an amazing insight!

She’s truly brilliant but can afford Larlos tennis lessons so he can play number 8 on Langley

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I said this before, and I'll say this again. In order to make a varsity team in expensive neighborhoods such as Langley, McLean, Potomac, kids, on average, are from either UMC or UC families, with extensive training when they were young.

You can, of course, point out a few exceptions here and there, but exceptions are not the norm.

So you live a life of competition in a house you overpaid for and looks bad and is cramped, and your kids can't even do activities they love unless they strive from 5yo on? What is the point of doing this?

DP here. DH always says you play to your field. If you are surrounded by smart kids from good families whose parents are successful, you rise up with those kids. We would rather our kids be average at the top.

If everyone is average at the top, then there are not opportunities for all these average kids, isn't that what people are saying regarding sports?

My kid plays 3 varsity sports and gets straight As. He isn’t exactly average. He is average among the top kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think what’s hard for a lot of us is we grew up in a time when things were less competitive but we grew up in families without a lot of money. So if you had the money, there was a lot of opportunity and you could join a swim club, join a gymnastics team, or get into a good private school as long as you could pay for it.

I remember thinking as a kid that I just needed to make money so I could give my kids those things. But now there is an order of magnitude more of people who are trying to get the same things, and in most places there aren’t more swim clubs being built, more competitive gymnastics programs being opened, or more elite private schools opening. We thought we could just earn more money and that would earn us access, but the finish line has been moved and the bar has been raised along the way.

You probably focused too much on buying a home in the “best” school pyramid and/or that private school, unaware that living in such a place would make other things harder.

We couldn’t afford buying in those places, so we moved outside the beltway.

Lo and behold, we were able to join a swim club relatively easily, my kids made their sports teams, and they are getting a fine education at their public school and will get to go to college. None of those things are the fanciest, but does it matter? They are getting all of the benefits of the swim club and being on teams. That is far better than not having them at all.

I think what you wrote is true for a lot of people. But I actually live out of DC/VA now in a mid-size city that unfortunately grew at a pace far faster than it has built new things. We don’t really have fancy schools or neighborhoods here on the scale of northern VA or parts of MD close to DC. That’s why this thread hits so close to home for me. If even second-rate, sort of dumpy cities have become crazy competitive just to access a pool and a sports team, that says a lot about the world.